2006-09-02 10:06:10 · 10 answers · asked by peaches_18 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
We've been swinging for several years now and we can tell you several different things that can help you out if you're looking to get into the lifestyle.
First - the other poster was right. You have to be 100% committed, in love, and trusting of each other. This is not something you are doing because you want to go have sex with someone else. This is also not something to do because your spouse wants to do it so you're going along. It has to be a complete agreement between the two of you.
Second - several of the other posters have thrown up websites and different places for you to put your profile up. It is a good idea to check these sites out, it may not be the best way to get started. These website will help you understand a lot of the rules, guidelines and other helpful tips that you will need as you get started. But, it can often be difficult to weed out people based off of a computer profile and pictures.
Third - Create rules for the two of you. This will help establish comfort levels for the two of you so you will both know what is OK and what is not. For example, we have met couples who have said that they did not want to kiss on the mouth (very "PRETTY WOMAN"-ish) because they thought that was too personal. Another very common rule is that any swapping must be done in the same room. Some of the rules we recommend are A) Condoms always, B) No playing alone (wife without hubby or vice-versa, C) No pain, D) No "Taking one for the team" (wife is with ugly other man so hubby can be with sexy other woman).
Fourth - Be prepared for bisexuality. For women who are swingers, it is a very common occurance. Most of the women are bi, but not all of them so don't feel it's a requirement. There are also some men who are bi in the lifestyle. Although not as many as the women, they are out there. Just don't be judgemental.
Fifth - Learn the lingo. There are several terms out there like "Soft Swap", "Full Swap", "BBW", "DSM", and "Bareback" that you will need to learn so you're not confused. (FYI - NEVER do bareback. That's sex without a condom). Some of the websites above will help you out with the lingo.
Sixth - NO MEANS NO. If either of you get into a situation you feel uncomfortable in or if something isn't right. When you say "NO" or "STOP", the other person is expected to comply. If not, then take appropriate actions as necessary.
Finally - Our recomendation would be to go to a swingers club to meet people. If you need help finding one in your area, go to www.nasca.com. They have club listings for the entire country. The reason we recommend a club rather then a website is because if you find that you're not interested in a couple, it's easier to walk away in a club setting then it is if you are somewhere else.
If you need any additional help or have any questions, please feel free to ask. We've helped several people with their questions and we'd be happy to help you too.
2006-09-05 10:58:34 · answer #1 · answered by B 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
OMG, the ignorance out there is astounding. "No morals", "Marriage needs help", etc. Gimme a break. For all of y'all's information, swinging REQUIRES that you have a 100% solid marriage as well as a profound committment to honesty and integrity. A deeper committment than, I'm sorry to say, many non-swingers currently understand. If you're going to swing, you have to live by the Golden Rule, which is the basis for all morality.
Do yourselves a favour and whatever you do, do NOT hook up with anyone you find on Y! Answers. Or anywhere ELSE on Y! for that matter. First check out www.swingersboard.com for information about swinging, tips on writing profiles, how to meet couples, how to find success and how to avoid failure at swinging... If you can think of a question, it's been asked at least twice already there. You just have to search for it.
Then, when you're ready, try posting a profile somewhere like www.swinglifestyle.com You can then search for other couples in your own area (or other areas, if you prefer to travel). Best of luck.
2006-09-02 23:50:54 · answer #2 · answered by intuition897 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow I don't agree with this kind of arrangements, but I don't judge either. May you have a happy life.
2006-09-02 17:11:35 · answer #3 · answered by Geneddly 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Free site: http://www.swinglifestyle.com
2006-09-05 12:00:23 · answer #4 · answered by Just David 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I like intuitions answer
2006-09-03 05:16:49 · answer #5 · answered by Anarchy99 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not her, but I like youre offer!
2006-09-02 17:08:31 · answer #6 · answered by Jerdy 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No morals, huh?
2006-09-02 17:13:14 · answer #7 · answered by JW 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should go to www.aff.com
2006-09-02 17:09:35 · answer #8 · answered by Chris 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
taz_a95672@yahoo.com lets talk about it
2006-09-02 17:08:29 · answer #9 · answered by rick a 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
your marriage need help.
I don't see the point in it????
2006-09-02 17:08:45 · answer #10 · answered by babydoll 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋