A neurobiology graduate student was working on his dissertation, and went to a brain store to get some brains to complete his lab study. He sees a sign remarking on the quality of professional brains offered at this particular store, and questions the proprietor about the cost of these brains.
"How much does it cost for engineer brain?" he asks.
"$3 an ounce," the shopkeeper says.
"That's not too bad," the biology student says, considering his budget. "How much does it cost for programmer brain?"
"$12 an ounce," the man says.
The student thinks about the cross-section he needs to make his study rigorous and asks, "OK, how much for a fundamentalist right-wing politician's brain?"
The proprietor lifts an eyebrow and proclaims, "$1,800 an ounce."
"Why is that kind of brain so much more?" the shocked student asks.
"Listen, pal," the busy shopkeeper says. "Do you have any idea how many fundamentalist right-wing politicians we have to harvest to get one ounce of brain?!"
2006-09-01 21:01:56 · 19 answers · asked by Woody 3 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
good one! hopefully that starbuck is still open! need more coffee!
2006-09-01 21:08:51 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
1. Any similarity between you and a human is purely coincidental!
2. Are you always so stupid or is today a special occasion?
3. As an outsider, what do you think of the human race?
4. I’d like to kick you in the teeth, but why should I improve your looks?
5. At least there’s one thing good about your body. It isn’t as ugly as your face!
6. Brains aren’t everything. In fact, in your case they’re nothing
7. Careful now, don’t let your brains go to your head!
8. I like you. People say I’ve no taste, but I like you.
9. Did your parents ever ask you to run away from home?
10. If I had a face like yours. I’d sue my parents!
11. Don’t feel bad. A lot of people have no talent!
12. Don’t get insulted, but is your job devoted to spreading ignorance?
13. Keep talking, s omeday you’ll say something intelligent!
14. Don’t you love nature, despite what it did to you?
15. Don’t think, it may sprain your brain!
16. Fellows like you don’t grow from trees; they swing from them.
17. He has a mechanical mind. Too bad he forgot to wind it up this morning.
18. He has a mind like a steel trap-always closed!
19. You are a man of the world-and you know what sad shape the world is in.
20. He is always lost in thought-it’s unfamiliar territory.
21. He is dark and handsome. When it’s dark, he’s handsome.
22. He is known as a miracle comic. if he’s funny, it’s a miracle!
23. He is listed in Who’s Who as What’s That?
24. He is living proof that man can live without a brain!
25. He is so short, when it rains he is always the last one to know.
26. He is the kind of a man that you would use as a blueprint to build an id iot.
27. How come you’re here? I thought the zoo is closed at night!
28. How did you get here? Did someone leave your cage open?
29. How much refund do you expect on your head now that it’s empty.
30. How would you like to feel the way you look?
31. Hi! I’m a human being! What are you?
32. I can’t talk to you right now; tell me, where will you be in the next 10 years?
33. I don’t want you to turn the other cheek; it’s just as ugly.
34. I don’t know who you are, but whatever you are, I’m sure everyone will agree with me.
35. I don’t know what makes you so stupid, but it really works.
36. I could make a monkey out of you, but why should I take all the credit?
37. I can’t seem to remember your name, and please don’t help me!
38. I don’t even like the people you’re trying to imitate, if you are at all.
39. I know you were born silly, b ut why did you have a relapse?
40. I know you’re a self-made man. It’s nice of you to take the blame!
41. I know you’re not as stupid as you look. Nobody could be!
42. I’ve seen people like you, but I had to pay admission!
43. Why are you so stupid today? Anyway, I think that’s very typical of you.
44. Do u practice being this ugly?
2006-09-07 16:58:13 · answer #2 · answered by ravi_khanna234 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
thats very funny :) i think only woody can say things funny like this
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2006-09-01 22:50:21 · answer #3 · answered by merdad b 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Booo! Coulda been a good joke though. Had to get all political on us.
2006-09-01 21:03:59 · answer #4 · answered by Alex 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i bet ur brain costs a whole lot more, cos its almost brand new, considering u never use it much!
2006-09-01 21:44:26 · answer #5 · answered by psycho 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
haha nice it might have been better if you said it was never used lol ♥
2006-09-03 07:14:28 · answer #6 · answered by ♥ The One You Love To Hate♥ 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
HAHAHAHAHAAA!!! That's a good one! I'm gonna pass that one around...
2006-09-01 21:06:22 · answer #7 · answered by redgoddess60 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
very funny
2006-09-01 22:46:45 · answer #8 · answered by Julies 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
haha
2006-09-07 15:23:57 · answer #9 · answered by chris m 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
good one
2006-09-07 12:54:28 · answer #10 · answered by Aeris_141 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋