well my best friend keeps on telling me to party with her and her friends and get high. The first time I drank was when I was 12 but she started drinking when she was 7 or 9 and i'm tired of telling her excuses. how can i tell her without making an excuse and losing her as a friend. I'm sure there's many ways but I can't think of an exact one to tell her.
2006-09-01 20:49:50 · 20 answers · asked by Undecidable2006 1 in Food & Drink ➔ Beer, Wine & Spirits
Just come straight out and tell her you think it is dumb.
Maybe she will feel that you are not her best friend for a while,.All relationships go through those hiccups and maybe after a while as she sinks into the morass , you won't want to be her friend any more.
What she is doing is dumb, dumb, dumb. Trouble is you mostly have to live life to see it. You however have been blessed with a brain at a young age and are using it.
Be very proud of yourself and sorry for her.
2006-09-01 21:04:17 · answer #1 · answered by Christine H 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Three things to live by-1-DO NOT LIE!! 2-DO NOT STEAL!! 3-DO NOT DISRESPECT OTHERS!!! You are 13 and I am sure you know Right from Wrong!! Image if the roles were reversed/trade places! How would you want a so call friend to tell you??? You will go through your whole life having MANY AQUINTECES OR AS SOME SAY FRIENDS!! WHEN IT COMES RIGHT DOWN TO IT, YOU WILL BE ABLE TO HOLD UP ONLY ONE HAND AND BE ABLE TO SAY 'I HAVE 2 OR 3 TRUE FRIENDS!! A TRUE FRIEND WILL NOT BE YOUR JUDGE AND JURY.... THEY WILL NEVER JUDGE YOU (no one is perfect) A TRUE FRIEND MAY NOT LIKE HEARING THE TRUTH NO MORE THAN YOU DO, MAY GET UPSET. A TRUE FRIEND DOES NOT JUDGE AND CAN ONLY LISTEN AND HOPEFULLY LEARN OR NOT. NO ONE CAN FORCE YOU TO DO ANYTHING YOU DO NOT WANT TO DO IT'S CALLED NO!!! A TRUE FRIEND TAKES THE GOOD WITH THE BAD AND HOPEFULLY YOU'LL BE LUCKY ENOUGH TO 4 OR 5 TRUE FRIENDS IN YOUR LIFETIME. PEOPLE MAY SAY THEY HAVE A BEST FRIEND..GUESS WHAT NO ONE EVER HAS A TRUE BEST FRIEND,MAYBE A FEW REALLY GOOD FRIENDS OK!! NO ONE IS BETTER THAN ANYONE ELSE IN THIS WORLD AND NO ONE NOT EVEN THE POPE IS PERFECT.. COULD YOU IMAGEN EVERYONE PERFECT??? HOW BORING THIS LIFE WOULD BE. SO, AFTER THE LECTURE HERE, JUST BE TRUTHFUL TO YOURSELF AND YOUR SO CALLED FRIEND. A TRUE FRIEND LAUGHS,CRYS,JOKES,DOES NOT JUDGE,GETS UPSET--WHO DOESNT?? BE YOURSELF,TELL THE TRUTH AND HOPE IN A FEW DAYS/WEEKS(HA,HA)ALL WILL BE WELL AGAIN, SOMEONE WHO CAN GIVE THE TRUTH AND TAKE THE TRUTH HONESTLY AND FORGIVES NOT JUDGES IS A REAL FRIEND!!! TREAT OTHERS AS YOU WISH TO BE TREATED AND YOU HAVE A GREAT LIFE WITH MANY FRIENDS. REMEMBER, YOU KNOW RIGHT FROM WRONG AND THE WORDS YES AND NO. ONLY YOU WILL KNOW WHEN THE TIME IS RIGHT TO SAY TO YOUR FRIEND (I SUGGEST WHEN THEY ARE SOBER OK?) HOW YOU REALLY FEEL AND IF THEY ARE A TRUE FRIEND IN A FEW DAYS ALL WILL BE WELL. GOOD LUCK!!! P.S. ALWAYS REMEMBER THIS, IF YOU CAN LOOK AT YOURSELF IN A MIRROR AND BE TOTALLY HONEST AND SAY=== I AM PROUD OF WHO I AM TODAY THEN YOU HAVE FOUND THE POT OF GOLD AT THE END OF THE RAINBOW, JUST EVERY DAY IS GOOD, BECAUSE YOU ARE..
2006-09-01 21:43:04 · answer #2 · answered by space4ever 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If this person won't respect your decision not to drink or use drugs, she is not your friend at all. Real friends never want their friends to do things both know are harmful.
In addition to knowing these things are dangerous to your health and safety, you might consider some state laws that will automatically revoke a driver's license until at least age 21 for underage drinking or drug convictions, or prevent you from even applying until then.
Drugs and alcohol also make you more vulnerable to sexual abuse,.pregnancy, and sexually transmitted diseases.
Why even make an excuse? If you care about her, simply tell her you are not willing to do things that are both illegal and dangerous and that you are worried about her. Let her know you want to spend time with her doing things that don't involve drugs and alcohol, but not those that do. She will need to decide if she care more about you or about the partying.
Of course, you really need to let an adult know what's going on. I know that's a really hard thing to do, but how will you feel if you remain silent and your friend is raped or gets AIDS or dies?
You wouldn't have even asked this if you didn't already know in your heart what is right. Be strong- you are worth it!
2006-09-01 21:00:24 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
You have to be yourself, because in the end - you WILL lose her as a friend, but not because of anything you did.
Do not let other ppl push you into doing anything you're not ready for. I did stuff for popularity in high school, and it turned out with me having a "bad reputation" long after I hung with that lot! But, I knew I was moving when I turned 18, I can't get hungup in a small town ...
At our 5 yr highschool reunion - the girl I told you about (above) didn't go... We all were 23yrs and beautiful, making good $ - and then we go to a pub later..
There she is; looking "used" as! As our barmaid. We all shivered.
This is a pivitol point in your life. Trust me, life is longer & the world is smaller than you think...
Trust your instincts, because I know you feel stuff... And go with that, and you'll never regret it. Even if you FEEL LIKE being outrageous - do it on your own terms, girlfriend, - ya hear me?!
Best bet: Play in your own playground, not someone else's hostile one, you understand? It's not about what you do, but who you are. Do you know yet? If you don't - go & find out, don't be afraid to make mistakes but don't be a fool, either...
let them work for the honour of YOUR friendship. Turn it 180 degrees. Guess what? It's not "uncool" to get good grades & follow the rules. You're still YOU! But you got a job right now, and that's to educate yourself. I might not be able to give you "mum & dad" advice but I was you once. So, now you know :)
I wish you all the best, feel free to write if you want a "big sister" type to talk to, I live in Sydney (former NYC local) - I been around a bit, so it's up to you - LOL! :p
Love,
Buggy
2006-09-01 21:10:46 · answer #4 · answered by lauraleebug 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Look young man, please go and tell her directly in the face
that it is very wrong morally and spiritually (belief in God) to
take drugs and beer together at your age.
It will kill both of you, if you don't stop now. Once you're
addicted to it, there's no way to turn around. You know, very
few addicted persons have turn over into a new leaf.
You should not make excuses even if you have to lose her as
a friend. You tell her that drugs and booze kills and you don't
want to die this way with her. Do you understand ?
2006-09-01 22:43:30 · answer #5 · answered by steplow33 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am finished with school and guess what my best friend and myself don't have contact at all, we just lost touch, we did everything together, my point is most friends only stay in your life for a certain period, and in the long run they disappear. Just by stating this question you have proof-en that you have a strong personallity. Give youre friend a choice, either she stops al this noncesnce she is busey with and you can stay friends, or she stops putting pressure on you to participate in this noncence otherwise she leaves you no choice but to break of this friendhip. Just remember a real friend cares about you, and have youre best interest at heart.
2006-09-01 21:03:42 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
well see, if she wont just accept your answer "no" then think about it she's not really your friend all she wants to do is help you mess up your life as hers is and tell her the ramifications of her actions if she continues. one thing she could get rapped with messing around with the wrong person, get locked up, or end up in rehab for months or years maybe. all you could do is try to tell her to calm down just a little but of course she's not going to listen but you know just watch after her and let her call you what she want because you know what that's all she could do. i had the same problem and i got hooked fast and it was hard to get off so just remind her she has a life waiting for her ahead, don't loose it now on drugs and wanting to be cute and getting high.
2006-09-01 21:02:16 · answer #7 · answered by wondering 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If your best friend doesn't understand your strength to say no to those things and the difference of your character maybe you should consider changing your criteria on what the "best friend" is supposed to be and offer you.
Don't give in that kind of temptation.
And there's no easy way of telling a friend to leave you alone at this age. If you can't find the strength to get rid of her then start avoiding her and her friends.
2006-09-01 20:54:13 · answer #8 · answered by Vette 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You are wise not to want to drink and get high. You must not ruin your life because you have a friend who has definitely screwed up hers. Now, no one has the right to influence you badly and make you do what is destructive to you. She is not a good friend if she tries. You are cool, not her. I would stop hanging around with her. But if you are really her friend, you should tell her that instead of trying to make you follow her example, she should follow yours. People who are at her stage often try to bring others down with them, don't follow.
2006-09-01 20:56:12 · answer #9 · answered by cpinatsi 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
initially, maximum alcohol tastes astounding, you're able to desire to not have discovered what you like yet. this is why there are maximum of kinds of alcohol; beer, wine, vodka, whiskey, etc. next alcohol is barely undesirable for you in great parts. as a remember of actuality, one or 2 darkish beers or glasses of pink wine has been shown to be sturdy on your well-being. finally, alcohol could make you look like a fool in case you drink too lots, yet each and every each and every now and then you certainly could desire to pass out and characteristic a sturdy time. besides if each and every person is eating, then no person seems silly using fact each and every person is appearing like a fool.
2016-10-01 05:08:49 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋