My mom has recently started talkin to her ex boyfriend again who I have always had somethin against. As I grew older i realized that she needs to be happy as well and to not just make us kids happy. The biggest problem is no longer the attention I dont get due to this guy, but when she is with him she lies to me and chooses him over us. For example, she said she didnt want to drive anywhere due to the bad weather, but 5 min later she calls this guy and asks him if he wants to do anythin tonite. An hour later shes drivin to go meet him somewhere 20 min farther than where my sister and I wanted to go. Please help. Im losing my best friend, someone whom I have become so close to over the last 3 years. We havent talked in a week and its killing me, but I want her to realize that her lying and choosing him over us hurts.
2006-09-01 18:54:25 · 16 answers · asked by J-Eight 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
tell her this
2006-09-01 18:57:06 · answer #1 · answered by alli 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I have started to answer this question 5 times. You have a very complex problem. There are several way to address it, so I opt for the simplest. Everyone has the right to make a mess of their life. Apparently your Mother and Father did just that. Oh no, they are not the only people who have, look at the divorce rate. Very high. However they definitely don't have the right to screw your and your sister's lives up. They are and will do just that. It is probably not their intent to but happen it will. IF YOU LET IT!
You at your age are probably more mature than both of your parents. Stay that way. Don't let the examples they have set be an excuse for you to follow in their footsteps. This goes for you sister also.
Your mom is probably not going to quit the boyfriend thing. I will tell you Mr. Wonderful does not care about your welfare at all. All he cares about is a good time. Apparently she is prone to do the same.
Do not let anything that has happened affect your morals.
I realize, this advise is not the quick fix you would like. But there is none. In the long haul if you stick to your morals. It will be OK.
2006-09-01 20:22:30 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You know how you keep wanting to be with your multiple cheating bf? Well your mom has this same problem (you probably learned it from her) she doesn't want to be alone and she will sell her soul to be a man and dump her daughters at the drop of a hat. This is what a maladjusted woman does (maybe it comes from being dumbed by your dad) You are a big girl now I take it (in college) Get yourself together and make a better life for yourself and don't repeat what she does. (ie dump the looser bf and become someone that a worthwhile guy would want)
2006-09-01 19:12:35 · answer #3 · answered by lily 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Look, my mother used to pull that kind of crap with me, when I was young enough to fall for it. Here's the thing, she will never stop treating you badly, or lying to you, until you stop letting her!
You have to say no! You cannot let her get away with it. If she is anything like my mom, the second things go bad with her boyfriend, she wil come running back to you. If you let her take advantage of you, it will go on for the rest of your lives. You have to let her know that you are not a disposable friend.
2006-09-08 11:57:55 · answer #4 · answered by mari 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Give her space maybe she feels like she raised you and now it's time to party. See how her relationship pass or fail with this fellow and be there when she needs you. Let her have some fun she wants to get her swirve on and when you have kids you'll see how many things you'll have to give up. I think she just wants to have a little fun so you should let her.
2006-09-07 18:48:57 · answer #5 · answered by No 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She sure isn't behaving like a best friend. But it sounds like she is going through a hard time and can't get her priorities straight. Do you know any of her other friends or family that is close. Maybe you could talk to them.
2006-09-01 19:06:38 · answer #6 · answered by Mr. Bodhisattva 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
guess even mother's have needs and sometimes uses bad judgement because she is lonely . kids are great but sometimes a mother needs a man in her life. kids can be a drain and she probably was wanting a nite for fun. reguardless if it was dangerous. hopefully she won't do that everynite .
2006-09-09 18:11:41 · answer #7 · answered by terri e 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
try telling her how much you mean to her first. second, try telling her how you feel about her going out with her ex-boyfriend. third, ask her what would she choose to live with forever? you and your siblings or her boyfriend? if she doesn't choose you and your siblings, then I apologize because she didn't choose you D,= but usually the mother would choose kids, because no mother could replace her children like that, if she is.... then I think she's a bad friend =/
2006-09-01 19:03:36 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Let her know how you feel , I'm sure she doesn't know what she is doing to you. Being a single mom is hard. Your always trying to fill that hole in your life up.
2006-09-01 19:09:08 · answer #9 · answered by baby_star78 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
i was in this same situation when i was 16,and its a hard thing to go thourgh,see if maybe u ,ur mom,sis ,and her boyfriend can all do sumtin together as a family,maybe u can get to know this guy more and maybe if u bond w/him u and ur mom will bond even tighter.u gotta give a lil to get a lil. good luck.
2006-09-01 19:04:52 · answer #10 · answered by ? 1 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Talk to her tell her how you FEEL. IT seems like you have have a good relationship, be honest and tell her how you miss her.
2006-09-01 19:39:10 · answer #11 · answered by angelsmommy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋