How would you react if your teenager told you to go to hell?

Answer 1

Will you? if not, then don't worry about it and consider where it came from.

Answer 2

Laugh. I then would say something wise...."i'm living in hell right this moment!" and laugh some more....

chances are you wont ever be told to go to hell again.

I haven't dealt with that issue because I suppose I only practice adultism when it's my last straw. Anotherwards sometimes you have to let your teen make decisions for him/herself. Whether or not you think it's a good idea or not. Weigh the pro's and con's with your teen-without raising your voice.

Teens happen to be rebellious because they are simply trying to find themselves....parent's feel they have to be in control.

It's like fighting two negatives without finding the positive.
Be more understanding....even if you don't really understand....but I bet deep down inside of you, you remember the day or days you were a teen too.

Think about it. Growing up especially these days are very hard.
What mattered to you as a teen may be totally different than what your teen is going through, but the bottom line is the same.

Good luck!

Answer 3

Ignore it. There isn't a teenager alive that hasn't said, or thought about saying, this to their parents.

Remember how confusing it was to be a teenager, all the hormones throwing wild parties in your body? How about remembering how annoying it was to be at a stage when some of your friends' parents seemed to be better than your own, and how resentful that made you of your own parents?

Your teenager will one day be old enough to realise how awful and hurtful these comments are, but until then, just let them appear to roll off your back, then break down in tears when (s)he isn't around.

Good luck!

Answer 4

It would depend on the circumstances. In many situations, I would expect an apology for the rudeness. I expect my children to express themselves courteously even when they disagree with me.

That said, if they had been or were under great stress I might find "go to hell" a contained reaction rather than taking a swing at me or worse. I think we need to extend our children the same kind of respect and understanding the we expect for ourselves. There have been times in my life when stress has mounted high and I've needed to let off steam. I'm not proud of how I've handled every situation in my life. If it's my fault, I apologize, even with my kids.

My mother tells a story about my sister when she was four. A neighbor was in for coffee. My mother called my sister in from playing outside to put her jacket away. My sister stamped in, picked up the jacket, looked my mother in the eye and said 'I hate you." and stomped upstairs to put the jacket away. The neighbor reacted, "Are you going to let her get away with that?" "With what?", my mother asked. "She's four. The only way she knows how to tell me that she doesn't like my decision is to tell me she hates me. Five minutes from now she'll run over, give me a hug and tell me that she loves me. Just what is she getting away with?"

I have watched instances where a teenager has told a parent they hate them or "you don't love me" or something similar. Then comes the pathetic carrying on by the parent, "How can you say that? I'm your mother/father. Look what I've sacrificed for you. You owe me some respect. blah... blah... blah." If my kids don't tell me they "hate me" or that I don't love them once in a while, I figure I'm not doing my job. Not all my decisions are going to be popular and I know it. I also know that they're not always eloquent in telling me they don't like my decisions. I usually let it go with something like, "Well, I'm sorry you hate me." or "I'm sorry you feel that way, but the answer is still no."

I think we are our children's most important examples. I don't think that zero tolerance is the best policy except under the most extreme circumstances. They need to see from our example that problems need to be seen from all sides and that we should always attempt to be fair in handling them. I say, step back, chose your battles carefully and cut your child some slack when it's appropriate.

Answer 5

Scare your kid. Disappear for a couple days (assuming your kid is old enough to be home alone) to a relatives house or something. Don't tell your kid where you are going. Have friends call and looking for you. Have your kid realize what life would be like without you around. 48 hours of your kid wondering what in the world happened to you will help your kid gain a little perspective. Then when you reappear days later the two of you need to have a huge heart to heart to get to whatever issues are beneath all that anger.

Answer 6

If I had a teenager and he or she told me that my first reaction would be to show them what hell was and then knock hell out of them. If I told my mom this I would not be here now.

Answer 7

They tell you to go to hell--say only if you comin and then Break their f@#$ing neck. A child is never to old to get an a@# whooping or a beat down because when they get older and they realize that those a@# whoopings and beat downs kept them out of trouble, they'll thank you. I totally agree with horrorfan. Most teenagers are pricks!

Answer 8

I would just walk away. I will get sad but the teenager doesn't really mean it. I'm a teenager and i have never told my mom to go to hell,thats so against my religion, but i have told her she gets on my nerves. My older sister told her she hated her. You see, this only happens when we're mad though. If the teenager is mad, don't blame the kid, they are a lil pissed at the moment so sometimes we say things we don't mean to say. Sometimes i get really mad at my parents and i think things but i know i will regret saying them outloud so i keep them to myself and i get over it n i realize how much they mean to me.

Answer 9

Something I've realized as an adult and talking to my mom is that if I am upset about something in my life, she is still a safe place to just vent. Your teen may be upset about something completely different, but you are safe to him/her. Setting ground rules in return is good, but is this an ongoing issue or is this the first time? If it's the first time, you may just want to take a time out for yourself, and check in on him/her in a bit to make sure everything's ok and see if they're ready to talk.

Answer 10

i wouldn't be in that position if i did have a kid.
1. i would listen to my kid, unlike most parents always think there right
2. Get all the facts of my kids point of view for something
3. If he/she did tell me to go to hell i wouldn't yell or ground them, that's just going to make it worse
i would want to find out why they feel this way and talk it over like civilized people without yelling or smacking

Answer 11

for one thing u dont allow ur teenager to run ur life~ u as a parent must take control, u show the teenager who the parent is, or better yet get sum help! before this goes further