2006-09-01 08:42:45 · 44 answers · asked by confused 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
For the past 10 months i have been dating a muslim guy and who is 3 years younger than me i.m approaching 30, when he talks about marriage he wants me to convert but only if it's from my heart! which is bizarre as it's not something i would ever have considered and would not do. Is there any other way we can be together, without either of us giving up our family backgrounds and our roots?
2006-09-01 08:46:50 · update #1
I think you'd only have to convert if you are NOT a Christian or Jew.
2006-09-01 08:50:44 · answer #1 · answered by Lotus Phoenix 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The trouble is that if you are not converted in to Muslim your marriage will be not 100% official in the eyes of orthodox Muslims. But I am married to Muslim for 14 years and still christian. Just because my husband don't really mind. The most important that I do have something to believe. And, by the way, Muslims accept Jesus
2006-09-01 08:54:12 · answer #2 · answered by Everona97 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just be clear with him that it will never happen and that you do want to marry him.
Its written that a Muslim man can only marry a non if the non converts, but he needs an ultimatum. He can still rspect his religion without you converting.
And if its love then he needs to think about what really matters.
2006-09-01 08:49:30 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes you can marry without you converting i was married to a Muslim for years but the thing is hes obviously putting you under pressure already you need to think long and hard about the life your marrying into. religion to them isn't going to the mosque now and then every aspect of their life is ruled by Islam I'm not trying to put you off but you WILL be under constant pressure to live by Muslim standards and traditions even if you don't convert .they do have respect for women but in a completely different way
and its to hard to explain on here. but when it comes down to basics theres only you who can judge what you can be happy with
2006-09-08 16:01:58 · answer #4 · answered by keny 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Culture and beliefs and how strongly we hold them form the basis of our value systems and thus will affect the long term nature of any and all relationships. Thus the answer to your question is difficult in that it may not matter if the two of you agree that it does not.
However looking at your question, it does matter to him and to you for differing reason. I believe that if you are to have a lasting and fulfilled relationship openness is the foundation stone and thus I would suggest that you discuss this openly and the real importance that each of you attach to this.
To put simply, you can walk with a stiletto on one foot and a sneaker on the other but it is uncomfortable and leads to stress that may eventually lead to disharmony and injury to the individual. remember in marriage you become like one entity and thus unity and equity in values is critical.
2006-09-06 22:05:40 · answer #5 · answered by insane2mad 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The institution of marriage is meant to unite man and woman into one. If you are going to be one, there is no way you can avoid becoming a muslim or he avoids becoming a non-muslim. It is if both of you are one that your marriage can workout. Without this, any arrangements would suffer at the very moment you would have enjoyed it most.
2006-09-07 02:16:44 · answer #6 · answered by Andrew O 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I converted to Islam 3 years ago.
The reason your boyfriend says " it has to be from your heart" is that...to convert you have to accept that there is only one true God, and Mohamed is his last prophet.
why not explain to your boyfriend how you feel, or research Islam and see then how you feel.
Without sounding stereotypical , it may be that he is afraid his parents would object and this would cause a problem for him, *** we are taught as Muslims to obey our parents above anything else.
2006-09-06 12:25:37 · answer #7 · answered by Autumns' eve 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Personal view: i loved a muslim gal, but coz me being a hindu, i was refused contact wid her, frm my family. i felt as if i was pushed and dragged in the religion war. but today i realise, when i am old enough to think, that religion is somethin that is rooted in an individual, frm the very 1st day, which actually moulds him or her in the later stage of life. so if u were to change today coz u love him, believe me, it mite not go far.
Plz note, this is me personal view, it mite to be of any concern to ur goodself, plz do not get offended wid my words, i do not mean any hard feelins...
-peace-
2006-09-06 13:38:47 · answer #8 · answered by the_lovable_rogue_31 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I was ask to change my religion by a jewish guy who wanted to marry me,I told him as I was an
Atheist out of choice and wouldn't convert for anybody to any religion.It is a bad start to a marriage when a partner asks to do something like that.Your boyfriend is probably trying to avoid confrontation with his people,that's why he asked you to do that deed .My advice DON' T DO IT .
Good luck , whatever you decide to do !
2006-09-06 07:53:06 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't know what the 'rules' are on this, but if he is very religious, he might not be comfortable marrying a non-muslim. Maybe you should talk to him about it, and see how he feels. And make sure he knows that you wouldn't want to convert.
2006-09-01 11:33:58 · answer #10 · answered by guest 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Go to an official, get married, live a happy life. Who says you have to convert?
Is this guy going to take the kids, go visit the in-laws in Pakistan and never return? Haven't you seen 'Not Without My Daughter' starring Sally Fields?
This is America, you can marry any guy you want (unless you're a guy!)... Just make sure what happens in America, stays in America!
2006-09-01 08:49:35 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋