How do you give space?

Question

Ok, I know my boyfriend loves me. I KNOW he does, but here lately he has been saying that he needs a little space. I am not the kind of person that needs space so it is hard on me. I dont even really know what 'space' is. How can I do this and still be able to spend time with him and he be happy too. See I am not from this town so I dont have many friends, and he is my BEST friend, so I like to be with him, but if he needs space he deserves it, so I need help.

I know he is into me, and i know he loves me too! I am just kinda scared that he might not love me as much if he goes without me. I know that i HAVE to do it... but what do I do since I dont know anyone?

And this is a VERY small town... we dont have 'salsa dancing, pottery, reading to the blind' type things... People around here ride around, hunt, fish and drink beer... VERY country town... pop.3000

Answer 1

When a guy tells you he needs space it usually means he needs time to deal with something. In most cases they are personal feelings which he has no control upon. It could be concerning you or concerning something or somebody else.

All he needs is some time to sort his feelings out. Respect his request and allow him to go when he desires and come when he wants. Show him that you value his choices. In time hopefully not long he will get back to normal. Hope it helps.

Answer 2

First of all, everybody needs space. Even you, believe it or not! It depends on how long u 2 have been together, how he's been acting, how much time do you spend together? If he's up to no good, all will show up eventually. Just give him enough rope to "hang himself" so to speak and if he is just coming up with an excuse time will tell. Honey, if you are new to town YOU NEED to make some friends. Find someone and go shopping, get a manicure, etc. Then if he keeps on and wants more and more space especially at night or on weekend, go out with new found friends- it will be hard, but force yourself to do this. Thenn if it doesn't work out, you will have a support system in place and people to go out with all set up. Never make "that one person" your whole world as it is not healthy. YOU are most important even more so than him and when he sees you are not so clingy he will take a second look, have respect for you, and not take you for granted. If he is on the up and up, good! Then when you do spend time apart, think of how good it will be when you do see each other! Let him be his own person and you be your own person. Life and love is better this way! No more excuses. Get out there!

Answer 3

promote off and Run. Sweetie, this guy is an complete jerk. the instantaneous he all started appearing chilly with you, you need to have demanded a proof. From what it appears like, he thinks that you're going to continuously be there as a 'toy' for him to %. up and use even as HE needs. each and every of the same old garbage about 'taking a wreck' gained't count number sooner or later, because 9/10 circumstances he will basically act an same again. So in my honest opinion, do not contact him anymore except to say, F*ck off! you'd be so a lot more effective without him. bear in mind, that is not any longer your fault, in order that takes position that this guy is a d*ck.

Answer 4

Ok, you need to make some new friends, and give him some elbow room. You dont need to be spending every waking second with him or thinking about him.--get some balance in your life. Volunteer for some charity, take up a hobby, read to blind kids, do something that makes you happy ----alone.
Nobody wants to date someone who is totally addicted to them and have no life except when he shows up at the door. It is too much responsibility except for the most selfish, obscenely narcissistic person to deal with.
YOU do need space-you just don't know what to do with it, because you don't have much going on besides sitting around waiting for that guy to get your life started.
He may think things are moving too fast. He may be trying to let you down easy. He may have his eye on someone else and want a little freedom to go check her out. He may think you are childish to be so dependent on him for entertainment.
Who knows?
Boys are stupid--You learned that in kindergarten.
Bottom line-get a life and have a boyfriend on the side.

Answer 5

He means that you are too needy. He means that you get some of your own things going on that do not include him, so you can have something to share and bring to the relationship. He means he is uncomfortable with you having nothing but him, and feels pressured to reciprocate, but doesn't want to give up the things he has in his life besides you, and doesn't want give them up to make you the center of his world. He is uncomfortalbe with being the center of your world. He doesn't want to be responsible for your feelings of security and happiness. And he shouldn't, since that's your job. He needs breathing room, and interaction with other people. You are suffocating him. Back off and join a gym, take a karate class, and a pottery class. Ask him to take one salsa dancing class with you per week, and make a date for dinner once a week, and watch a movie or something the third time you see him, per week. Make him come find you, and make him fit into your busy schedule. Give him a chance to miss you, becuase he will, once you become busy and not always available to him. Let him come with you to the gym once in a while, and play rackettball. The point s, give him a chance to miss you and come find you.

Answer 6

Well, sometimes space means that a bridge needs to be put between. I am not sure if you both are always together, but that's what happens when you are always together. I experienced that and lost someone that I really love because I wanted to be with them 24/7 worried about what they doing, to the point I drove him away. So I suggest making new friends, finding a hobby you can do, and/ or volunteer your time at local shelters or hospitals. Find things that will occupy your mind so you won't worry what he's doing. Things will work out.

Answer 7

Don't call, don't go around, don't ask about the person and certainly don't hang around their house. You need to get more friends and a life independent from your boyfriend. You cannot have a partner be your all. As for friends, then go do yoga, dance or join your local readers club. Go online to make more friends and find like minded ppl. JUST CUT HIM OFF. Completely. Act like you have basically broken up because he HAS broken up with you. Good Luck!

Answer 8

Give him space means let him do things on his own without your intervention or participation, such as accompanying him or on the telephone with him.

Find something that you enjoy doing alone, maybe go to the gym to work out, exercise or even go to a quiet cafe to read a good book; to have some times away from each other actually bring you guys closer in a relationship.

Go out on your own and find something you like to do, it'll help you out.

Answer 9

He wants you to do something other than be a "cling-on". It's hard moving to a new town though. It's also not healthy to spend all your time together. Try to get some friends or take a class or something. He cares about the relationship and that's why he's telling you.

Answer 10

You're probably young and you're probably smothering him and he's probably just not that interested in spending every moment with you. If you need someone like that, you've got the wrong guy for you. Imagine liking someone well enough but instead of having time to do things for yourself, everything always had to be about or with this other person --- is it possible that's what you're doing to this guy? Sounds like it's time for some serious self-examination. Start by putting yourself in his shoes.