She won't stop talking about herself and never asks othe people questions to find out about them. It's not that she's conceited, she's nervous and talking is her "crutch". It getting to the point that sometimes I would rather go out just the two of us, without friends.
2006-09-01 07:31:09 · 14 answers · asked by Lumberg06 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
Just be honest with her and tell her she needs to ask queatsion and allow others to answere.
2006-09-01 07:33:02 · answer #1 · answered by cin_ann_43 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
1. Some people use compulsive domination of the conversation as a way of avoiding personal questions being asked. This may also be her way of possessing you & keeping others at bay.
2. It's very rude, and everyone around here is probably looking over her shoulder after a few minutes for a means of escape.
3. It sounds like it bothers you as well. Is she really worth it to you? Can you imagine sharing a whole life with this woman? She's destroying your enjoyment socially.
4. Have a frank talk with her about this. It has to stop, or it's not going to work. If she has to get help for it, then encourage her. But each time she starts this at a social function, stop her by directing the conversation away from her incessent nosy questions.
Good luck!
2006-09-03 02:51:04 · answer #2 · answered by mitch 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Before you two go out with friends, take her aside and lovingly tell her to make sure that she is considerate of the other people's questions. Tell her that you realize that she talks a lot because she is nervous but that the reason that you two are going out with the other people is to enjoy their company. Tell her that in order to enjoy the other people's company that you have to be able to hear what they have to say and let them share what is going on in their lives too. Tell her that they have to be given equal time to talk as well. After all, that is why they are there!
Just do this creatively and she should be able to receive this coming from you! Good luck!
2006-09-01 14:41:13 · answer #3 · answered by December Princess 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well sounds to me like you have your work cut out for you. Personally, that would definitely drive me nuts. A constant talker, with the subject being "her". You didn't say how she was when it was just the two of you. But she shouldn't be nervous if they are "friends".
If you care about her then just be honest with her and tell her its becoming a problem with her constant talking when out with friends. I don't think you can beat around the bush with this one. Either you confront the problem straight on or continue to let it bother you for the rest of your relationship. I'm sure its nice to just go out with your girlfriend most of the time, but everyone needs friends.
2006-09-01 14:45:29 · answer #4 · answered by allyp51 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Talk to her and explain that it makes her look and sound conceited and that you love her and want other people to like her as well. Try having her do a time out from talking when with other couples and only talk when someone addresses her. Let her know that you feel like going out and leaving her by herself.
2006-09-01 14:39:43 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Is she like this when ur alone? if not then its obviously a social thing,
if she always talks everyone to death including u, then its just the way she is
u cant change her
I once had a stepdaughter like this, she was the same regardless of where or who she was with
shes now 29 and married, still talks the leg of anyone who will stay around to listen, not many
luckily her hubby is a quiet guy and doesnt seem to mind.
2006-09-01 15:09:59 · answer #6 · answered by livachic2005 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
have an honest discussion with her. tell her ytou're not looking to hurt her feelings, are accuse, but you'd like to discuss something which you've noticed. talking about yourself is easy, because it's a subject you know everything about, and nobody can really have a differing opinion. perhaps you can suggest she try and ask more questions (which helps progress conversation), instead of making self-related statements (which stifles conversation).
your other option is to try and steer the conversation in a direction that allows everyone to participate. dont cut her off or ignore her statements, as you could hurt her feelings unintentionally. maybe try a line like," oh yeah, i remember that time. that was fun. but anyway, ..."
2006-09-01 14:37:48 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Tell her straight. Tell her to not talk unless spoken to or asked a question. When talking limit herself to 20-30 seconds per question.
2006-09-02 04:00:30 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
You should be able to talk to her about her problem. Just point out that it would be better for her to ask questions about others than to spew about herslef all the time! Explain that you are not trying to hurt her feelings, just to help her.
2006-09-01 14:39:28 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
If she's uncomfortable around friends, maybe just going out by yourselves would be more comfortable for her.
It strikes me that these people can't be that close of friends to her if she's uncomfortable around them. Maybe you two can go out with her friends once in a while.
2006-09-01 22:38:39 · answer #10 · answered by drshorty 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
She probably doesn't even realizes that she's doing this. You and her should have a sign to signal her when she starts talking to much. Like pat your belly could be a sign. When she sees you do that, she will know to shut up.
2006-09-01 15:23:27 · answer #11 · answered by sheeny 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋