Steve is shopping for a new motorcycle. He finally finds one for a great price, but it’s missing a seal, so whenever it rains he has to smear vaseline over the spot where the seal should be.
Anyway, his girlfriend is having him over for dinner to meet her parents. He drives his new bike to her house, where she is outside waiting for him.
“No matter what happens at dinner tonight, don’t say a word.” She tells him, “Our family had a fight a while ago about doing dishes. We haven’t done any since, but the first person to speak at dinner has to do them.”
Steve sits down for dinner and it is just how she described it. Dishes are piled up to the ceiling in the kitchen, and nobody is saying a word. So Steve decides to have a little fun. He grabs his girlfriend, throws her on the table and has sex with her in front of her parents.
His girlfriend is a little flustered, her dad is obviously livid, and her mom horrified when he sits back down, but no one says a word. A few minutes later he grabs her mom, throws her on the table and does a repeat performance. Now his girlfriend is furious, her dad is boiling, and her mother is a little happier.
But still there is complete silence at the table. All of a sudden there is a loud clap of thunder, and it starts to rain. Steve remembers his motorcycle. He jumps up and grabs his jar of vaseline.
Upon witnessing this, his girlfriend’s father backs away from the table and screams, “OKAY, ENOUGH ALREADY, I’LL DO THE ******* DISHES”
Comments
Joke: The Fortune TellerAugust 27, 2006 at 1:08 pm · Filed under Jokes
During a recent publicity outing, Jennifer sneaked off to visit a fortune teller of some local repute. In a dark and hazy room, peering into a crystal ball, the mystic delivered grave news. “There’s no easy way to say this, so I’ll just be blunt: Prepare yourself to be a widow. Your husband will die a violent and horrible death this year.”
Visibly shaken, Jennifer stared at the woman’s lined face, then at the single flickering candle, then down at her hands. She took a few deep breaths to compose herself. She simply had to know. She met the fortune teller’s gaze, steadied her voice, and asked her question.
“Will I be acquitted?”
2006-09-01 07:01:11 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
i love it so much ill give u a 20 out of 1-10
2006-09-01 09:07:54 · answer #1 · answered by mommy to be 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
good.
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2006-09-01 19:00:26 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
LOL try this:-
Testicles
A young girl sees her father in the shower and asks what his testicles are.
"Those are the apples of the Tree of Life," he tells her, by way of poetic concealment.
She tells this to her mother, who replies, "Did he say anything about that dead branch they're hanging on?"
2006-09-01 07:02:30 · answer #3 · answered by Pd 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
LMAO!! WoW! That was too funny! Thanx. Im gonna remember that one.
2006-09-01 08:14:44 · answer #4 · answered by Happily Married 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
a guy grew to become into leaving a convenience keep along with his morning coffee while he > observed a maximum unique funeral procession coming near the interior of reach > cemetery. > > a protracted black hearse grew to become into accompanied via a 2d long black hearse approximately > 50 feet at the back of the 1st one. at the back of the 2d hearse grew to become right into a solitary > guy in a gloomy greater wholesome strolling a pit bull on a leash. at the back of him, a short > distance back, have been approximately 200 adult adult males strolling single report. The bystander > grew to become into curious so he respectfully approached the guy strolling the canines and > mentioned, "i'm so sorry on your loss, and that i be responsive to now could be a bad time to > disturb you, yet I even have in no way considered a funeral like this. Whose funeral > is it?" > "My spouse's." > "What got here approximately to her?" > the guy spoke back, "My canines attacked and killed her." > He inquired added, "nicely, who's interior the 2d hearse?" > the guy responded, "My substantial different's mom. She grew to become into attempting to help my spouse > while the canines grew to become on her." > A poignant and considerate 2d of silence exceeded between the two adult adult males. > > "am i able to borrow the canines?" > > "Get in line." > > >
2016-10-01 04:30:49 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Those were some great jokes!
2006-09-01 07:20:03 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
haha
2006-09-01 07:12:07 · answer #7 · answered by i cant decide.... 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
good ones.
2006-09-01 07:07:10 · answer #8 · answered by katz 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
funny as hell!
2006-09-01 07:25:18 · answer #9 · answered by DiZzY 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
LOL. LOL.
2006-09-02 07:34:35 · answer #10 · answered by jfmm 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋