Im 8months 1 1/2 weeks along and am confused i thought that i could handle this but now im fealing as though im not ready to be a mom im not married im not done with my college and the baby's dad is not around i see him as only a donor! i drove out to his house the other night to have a talk with him face to face *i thought that would make him face reality* we were suppose to be married before we found out about baby but were savin money then we found out we were expecting he was very excited i was very scared and he proposed and said we need to get married sooner since were havin a kid then out of the blue im not atractive and he left me for this other girl he wont call or anything and when i went out there he wouldnt look at me and wouldnt talk to me i dont understand i was hopin he'd come around and be active in his sons life what do i do? our relationship was perfect then out of the blue it all went down hill im scared i miss him i need him and love him and want him around! help...
2006-09-01 05:30:36 · 11 answers · asked by LB 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Other - Pregnancy & Parenting
You will be perfectly fine without him. I promise. I am 20 and have a 2 1/2 year old. Her father is around when he wants to be but sometimes it's better to just do it yourself. I am not saying it isn't hard but it is so rewarding that I don't even worry about the struggles. Your baby's father seems like he needs to grow up and you can't make him do it. Just forget about him for now and concentrate on having a healty baby. He or she will make everything okay. It's like that baby will make you whole.
2006-09-01 05:36:04 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I went through the same exact thing...except I am not as far along as you. Hunny, there is a good chance he might not come around, ever. There is a chance that he is that immature to not want to be in the babys life or take responsibility. Unfortunatley, this happens everyday, I been there. It still hurts for me. But no, you DO NOT need him! He doesnt need you, does he? You are scared, thats natural! You can miss him and still love him...but dont be wanting something that is only going to become a problem for you...
please consider visiting this site: www.singlemothers.org
I feel so horrible that you may be naive enough to think he will def. come back....please, dont get your hopes up. its hard, but focus on that baby, you dont want to be like him and walk out of your own childs life before he is even born...the baby knows when you are sad, vulnerable, crying, upset, stressed...if he already has one parent walking away, what happens when you do too?
Just to let you know, I dated my boyfriend for 6 years, I got pregnant by choice, we decided we were ready, we got a house together, he proposed two months later, and then a month later, he left. Took all of his things when I was at work, and when I called him, he broke up with me. He doesnt return phone calls, is with other girls, saying it isnt his kid...whatever makes him feel better...the other day i got a blood screen test done that came back that my baby may have trisomy 18, a genetic disorder like down syndrome, but more fatal. i called to tell the father of the child, and he never returned the call, even after i left a detailed message. take this as an example...some things seem perfect, but arent. some things seem forever, but arent. some things seem to never be able to get better, but will.
you are not the only one, please dont think you are alone. I think it is time to let go, who knwos he might come around, but why would u want someone who doesnt want to be with you, or didnt want to be with you at your most emotional time of need?
Good luck...
2006-09-01 14:43:02 · answer #2 · answered by *mommy to two* 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think the father of your child is just as scared as you are. He doesn't know if he is ready to be a good role model in your child's life. I do believe one day.. maybe not today or tomorrow he will come around to see his son. I am sure he is just running away from his problems and hopefully he will realize he needs to be a man not only for himself and the baby, but for you as well. As for the other woman in this life I am sure he doesn't care for her like he does for you, after all.. you two were supposed to get married! This pregnancy thing scares all of us, male or female.. and he probably just doesn't know how to act. Best wishes, and I hope he is there to watch his son being born, to support you! Take Care!
2006-09-01 05:37:04 · answer #3 · answered by christines_lil_shorty 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You can do this with out him let him know that I am sorry this happened to you but you still have someone in your belly your going to have to love and take care of. If that jerk isn't there for you he is probably is as scared as you and that's why he is acting this way. Be strong
2006-09-01 05:34:59 · answer #4 · answered by 98ta 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You don't need someone like him anyway. Just sue him for child support when the baby comes. Then get on with your life.
2006-09-01 05:34:11 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wish I could say the right thing but I don't know myself. I know you can't make someone love you. Maybe he'll come around. Guess you'll have to wait and see. Maybe he just paniced.
2006-09-01 05:47:50 · answer #6 · answered by Lynn 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you have to let it go. you are going to be so busy soon. its going to be hard to keep your self sane enough.focus and all the love you feel when your son is born will make it worth it.things are going to get crazy between your hormones and lack of sleep. really focus take a deep breath and dont worry about it(HIM) YOU HAVE WAY MORE IMPORTANT THINGS TO WORRY ABOUT.you will be ok. focus.
2006-09-01 05:47:02 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
look most men in our society have lost the concept of responsability you both created life and he ran for safety
if comes back great if not you can find the strength to raise you child trust me my mom did it
2006-09-01 05:35:20 · answer #8 · answered by elvis2 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
sorry i agree with the above
2006-09-01 05:34:29 · answer #9 · answered by Nanakins 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
MAKE THE BEST LIFE POSSIBLE FOR YOU AND YOUR LITTLE ONE. MAY GOD BE WITH YOU.
2006-09-01 12:35:42 · answer #10 · answered by nwnativeprincess 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋