My boyfriend was on myspace and he was sending messages to girls he never met like , you are so pretty I can't stop looking at your picture, or one day I would like to meet you and take you out to dinner or, when can we meet, things like that. He sent these at the beginning of our relationship when he was still in Texas and I was in Indiana, but I felt betrayed by it. He has moved to Indiana with me and there were no recent messages to girls of this kind while he has been living with me, but I got mad and broke up with him anyway. He told me that since we are together now and he is here with me that he has given up that stuff and he hardly ever even visits myspace anymore, which is true because I always go look at the time he last logged in and the date is still the same. I have a hard time trusting him now and I want to get over it but I cant and I bring it up all the time. He hasn't actually cheated on me, but I just can't gain the trust that I had before back?? What should I do?
2006-09-01 04:01:53 · 22 answers · asked by smoody 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
It's all about forgiveness. True forgiveness means having no recollection of his mistakes. You have to let it go if you really want to move on. I disagree with it not being a form of cheating. I think that if he is with you then there is no reason to speak to another woman the way he should only be speaking to you. If that is what he is doing now then try and give him this chance to prove that he can be 100% faithful. If it happens again I would suggest you move on before the relationship goes any further.
2006-09-01 04:07:40 · answer #1 · answered by PINKY 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I think you need some time to yourself to see if its really worth it. Guys always play girls like its a sport or something. If he was in a relationship with you when these stupid stuff was goin on then he should have remembered about you two being together. There should be no reason that he should be saying that stuff to other girls. Once that TRUST is gone, it is so hard to bring it back. I know this from my own recent life experience. I love someone very much but I can't trust him to ever tell me the complete truth. IT WILL BE HARD IF YOU TRY TO CONTINUE TO WORK THINGS OUT.
2006-09-01 04:07:03 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
I think your bf is right, if you really want this relationship to work out than you have to trust him. You are actually sure he;s not doing the same things as you have checked so don't tire him with suspicions, if you do so you will loose him. Be comprehensive and do not trust him only if he gives you a real reason. I really mean it, if you'll continue with your suspicious like a child you will regret it. He is proving to you that he loves you, what should he do more than that?!
2006-09-01 04:19:37 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you can't trust him over something little like that - and you admittedly know he's not been "out there" much on my space - then why are you still fretting? He's gonna leave ya hon and rightfully so if you don't get a grip and trust him. Relationships are always a risk...you decided to go for it ..so now you have to take the risk and trust him...and if not?..you will lose him. Nobody likes not being trusted...(especially if they have been trustWORTHY).
2006-09-01 04:13:06 · answer #4 · answered by svmainus 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Usually when a guy does sneaky things like that I am the first one to say leave him, but in this case, it seems like he was talking to you at first like he was all the other girls on line, but he choose you. Were you in a serious, monogamous relationship when this happened? If not and you were only talking its no big deal. I mean he moved to be with you and you said yourself he has not gone on line to MS in a long time. This is something I would be so paranoid about. You might be losing a good man.
2006-09-01 04:06:26 · answer #5 · answered by jam_psb 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Break up with him and deal with your trust issues. He's probably going to cheat ..he might not have yet..but he will. He's a player. There is no reason for a guy to be emailing stuff like that is you are his gf and have been all along. The other thing is: YOU ARE A SNOOP!! Stop being so sneaky yourself..you shouldn't be invading his privacy...get over it!! I think you have trust issues and until you deal with them, you will keep ending up with bf's you don't trust!!
2006-09-01 04:11:45 · answer #6 · answered by beautifully broken 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Get a grip girl! You obviously have some issues but unless you are willing to take it to the level of discussing your concerns of trust with him, no amount of yahoo answers is going to assist you in any sort of resolution!
2006-09-01 04:06:13 · answer #7 · answered by Goodie66 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you should break it up, if he is doing that on line, you never know what he is doing when he meets girls. Trust is never gain back once is lost. Move on.
2006-09-01 04:08:53 · answer #8 · answered by lluvia2wcc 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you should go ahead and break up with him. you are not good enough for a trustworthy man such as him. you speak of regaining trust when you never had any before. he is the one trying to make a commitment that you are incapable of accepting, therefore you are sabotaging the relationship. be fair to both of you and end it now before he is hurt worse.
2006-09-01 04:08:43 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
the only way for this to work out is for you to do one of two things..... break up with him and that is that, or believe in him and the fact that it was at the begining of the relationship, and he is now living with you says that he does care for you.
the only person that can make this decision is you, but dont rush into your decision think about it long and hard.
2006-09-01 04:06:19 · answer #10 · answered by dgr0919 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋