i m going around with someone,he is indeed a marriage material,BUT his dad is against our relationship,his dad wants his son to have an arranged marriage with a girl chosen by his family,my boyfriend is a family oriented guy,neither he wants to go against his dads wish nor he could stay without me,what could be an alternate solution to save our relationship,we truely love each other but just cannot understand how to overcome this problem without hurting any one,PLZ HELP ME??how do i convince my boyfriend to marry me without disappointing his dad???ANY SOLUTION FOR ME PLZZZ???
2006-09-01 00:22:36 · 14 answers · asked by Sofia M 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
See if you can get your parents to arrange the marriage for you...
2006-09-01 00:26:17 · answer #1 · answered by Kristi C 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi,
I do understand that its a very difficult situation u r going through.
First & foremost try & find out as why exactly your fiancee's dad doesn't want him to get married to you. Because why Iam saying this is his dad might have some reason behind it. find out the reason & u will definetly get an answer. The answer to your question may be within u itself.
Find the reason behind , coz some many people have different reasons like some may speak about equal status(money), caste & many more.
If all these are not the reason behind rejection & its only his ego problem. Then ask your fiancee to speak to his dad in a humble manner & make him understand that u r the best choice for their family & not alone for him.
Make tham feel that u are the right person for their family happiness & union.
In many families the elders are very orthodox, they feel that a son or a daughter who is getting married beyond their choice is something that affects their ego which generally many parents may not be able to bear. Remember this thought might come to u when u become a mother. its obvious , its very normal to happen to anybody. So put your self in their situation & see what could convinence u if your son was getting married to some whom u don't want to. And just see u will defintely get the answer for your question & u will be able to convenince your fiancee's father. The answer is right their in u just put your self in their shoes & ask a few questions to your self as to waht u will do & definetly u will get the answer. All the best................
Most of all have faith, u can succeed......... for sure!.
2006-09-03 20:48:52 · answer #2 · answered by anne 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just leave him alone, he is trying to play around.............
This is all Non-sense.........
If he really loves you, ask him to prove that by marrying you, Plzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.. don't give up ..... ..... to him. I hope u understand what i mean.
Given below are the checkpoints for you. [ To make or break your relationship]
1) His financial strength : whether he can maintain the same standard of living, which you are enjoying now or you are ready to compromise on that.
2) His he capable of Making money, without his father's support... Is he a earning Member .
3) Does he really LOVE you....... [ Use your mind & Not Heart]
4) Whether you are ready for leaving your family and can join hands & even ready to share yr own house responsibility.
If you clear above given points positively, than go ahead... thinking of trying to make each other's family understand first that you really cannot leave without each other.
Give them time & chance to take their decission. If nothing positive turns out and you people have considered above 4 points favourably ..
You can take a right decision of having your own house& leaving together happily... But every thing will depend upon howmuch you really love each other.
Bye & take care
Lastly, you are free
2006-09-03 22:52:57 · answer #3 · answered by Vijaypappu 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
girlie there is no solution. he either makes up his resolve to marry you and forget about his father or he goes to daddy and forgets about u.
the only other thing i can obviously think of is that you try to win his father over by showing him that you are everything that his son needs plus i am assuming there is a family clash as well. no easy answer again - you just have to try try try try very hard and hope for the best.
but then again it will depend on your circumstances. i am in a similiar situation but i am in the position of your boyfriend... so for me there are only two answers:
a) do the wrong thing in my family's eyes (and the consequences are not going to be nice in any sense)
b) forget about the man i love and move on to an 'arranged marraige'. which wont be easy on me or him but will make my family VERY happy.
good luck! if you need some more advice then contact me via email.
2006-09-01 00:28:42 · answer #4 · answered by lilmisssquare 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It doesn't matter what his parents think or how they feel about you marrying their son. What's important is that he loves you and you love him. If he cannot stand up to his dad about wanting to marry you, then he is not the one for you. I believe that if you truely love someone, other people's opinions wouldn't matter. If he truely loves you, then he would marry you regardless of what his dad says. You cannot please everyone ... someone along the way will eventually get hurt, but if you are both happy with each other then that's all that matters. Everyone will just have to deal with it on their own. Goodluck!!!
2006-09-01 00:40:26 · answer #5 · answered by bsantos0523 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unfortunatley this is one of those situations where you have to let him make the call. You probably should let him know you love him and step away for a minute so he can figure out what to do. If he truly loves you, then he will be with you no matter what. Hopefully it will work out that way, if so, remember, you are with him and not his family. But don't give him too long to make up his mind. What ever is meant to be will be and I have learned there is alot of truth to that saying.
2006-09-01 00:29:07 · answer #6 · answered by ? 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your bf has to decide if he wants to be happy for the rest of his life. I agree with those who said that if he truly is the guy for you then he will stand up to his father. True love will always find a way!
2006-09-01 03:00:46 · answer #7 · answered by hebe935 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he has to disucss his happiness with his parents and you will have to stay out of it, but if he is not willing to put everything on the line for you or try to work a solution for everybody to be happy, then if you want to get married he will have to do something or you get out of there. and find true happiness with another
2006-09-01 00:46:56 · answer #8 · answered by orangebutterfly82 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ask ur parents 2 talk n convince his parents.
2006-09-02 01:38:55 · answer #9 · answered by Angel 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell him to convence the pareents first if they are not accepting your love take the help of person who is very friendly speak with him tell your true love story.tell him to convience.i can't undrstand that your boy friend affraid of his parrent how he loves you.it very difficult to suitation.discus with your parents also they can speak with them.
2006-09-01 00:33:07 · answer #10 · answered by sathishshivakumar 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋