and i hate drinking also we have two kid to gether what would you do
2006-08-31 22:11:28 · 14 answers · asked by born2bsurfer 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
I could tell you to get her help but you cant do that unless she wants it. I am sorry that your kids have to go through that and you to. I hate to tell you to leave but that maybe your answer....And if you do take the kids with you...I dont care if she is a good mother they do not need to see her like that...If you love her then use tough love...Tell her you will come back when she gets help...But dont take the kids completely away from her you do not want her to think she has lost everything and drink even more.My boyfriend drank daily for 12 years of our 13. I was going to leave him but the unthinkable happen my brother was killed in a car wreak he was drinking and driving....I lost my brother but it saved my relationship.....He has been sober for 1 year and 1 month.....Its sad that it took my brother getting killed to help my boyfriend to see the dangers in drinking......My prayers are with you....I hope things work out.
2006-08-31 22:19:33 · answer #1 · answered by pam b 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have two children with a girlfriend and she is an alcoholic. And you say you "hate" drinking. Can't be. Unless, of course, you get high on a drug(s). This is a phony question or you are a dependent guy who does not feel superior unless your significant other has more negatives than you do. If that is the case, get therapy so the kids will have one sober, thinking parent.
2006-09-01 05:19:56 · answer #2 · answered by ALWAYS GOTTA KNOW 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can't change a drunk...
and she won't stop...
You're in a really difficult position because of the kids...and if you're in California, the partner laws are so disfavorable to the male your only chance would be...if kids are involved and it's a middle of the day binge you could try calling in CPS...
Outside of kidnapping (packing up and leaving with the kids) you're going to be hard pressed for a quick and easy solution.
What I would do - is tell her she's done - or we are done.
I would do it on paper and at the bottom have a place where she agrees to go to AA or quit getting drunk or whatever. She signs it - you save it.
next time - pack up and go.
Life is to short, too precious, to raise kids in that environment or to be that unhappy.
Good luck to you
2006-09-01 05:18:42 · answer #3 · answered by Warrior 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i am a recovering alcoholic and drug addict i attend AA meetings daily and work the aa program what made me change was losing my kids you can try going to alanon to get help dealing with her she has to meet her bottom before she will quit all the ultimatums wont work if they are not reinforced i hate to say it but she is going to need a rude wake up call and that may mean you and those precious kids leave her and tell her she is only able to see the kids in a supervised sober environment and get cps involved i wish you and your kids luck
2006-09-01 06:56:40 · answer #4 · answered by DUCKYJ 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not a good situation,for you and your children.You can ask her to get it under control,with getting help,for her.This usually doesn't work if shes in denial.Sometimes it takes a tragic situation,before a person will seek help.
Ask yourself this questions,is this putting a strain on our relationship and are the children showing any signs of being affected, by this.
2006-09-01 05:25:52 · answer #5 · answered by Rather be dead than red... 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
the first thing you have to do is stop nagging her if you are. if you nag a drunk they just use that as an excuse to drink more. you can call your lcoal alcoholics anonymous hotline and get soem intervention. they can help you and tell you what will work best.
2006-09-01 05:18:01 · answer #6 · answered by manyhartz 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
get her some help, but she has to be ready to quit drinking for it to work. (If you want to stay with her) Otherwise, you can leave and work on getting custody of the children. But you should know that as long as both of your names are on the birth certificate, you both have equal rights.
2006-09-01 05:14:33 · answer #7 · answered by Gayle 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Take her to AA meetings & never leave her alone with the kids
2006-09-01 05:13:33 · answer #8 · answered by scarlet 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
trick y question man. the kids make it very tricky. Think what is best for the children?
2006-09-01 05:13:48 · answer #9 · answered by Just John 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
leave her and fight for custody becaue she is unfit. you will find a nice woman who will love you even more because she knows you have your priorities straight.
2006-09-01 05:16:30 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋