My 2 oldest are both girls ages 12 ( 7th grade) 10 ( 5th grade). My 12 year old wants more privledges than the 10 year old? She wants to stay outside longer and have her freedom. My 12 year old is upset that I put a time limit on what time to be back in the house. What should I do?
2006-08-31 12:03:23 · 13 answers · asked by TNA Ambassador 6 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
i think the twelve year old does deserve more freedom then her younger sister but they both need limitations on the freedom if you feel they need limitations then thats what they need to follow there are limitations on life at every age so you are teaching them a valuable lesson if you let them do whatever they wanted then you would not be a responsible parent if they dont like it tough cookies!keep up the good work
2006-08-31 12:14:09 · answer #1 · answered by happy-go-lucky 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Now a days the world is alot different then it was even a decade ago, I suggest that if you give her more freedom, that it be very controlled. It only takes one time for your daughter to be out a little later that some older kids can approach her to do things that you wouldn't want her doing.
Maybe you could allow her a later bedtime or allow her to have her friends over later or more often. But I am on the side of letting you be in control over her activities, like I said the world tries to turn our kids out very young and 12 is very young.
I know at that age my parents were lettng me do pretty much what I wanted and now as an adult, I wished that they would have protected me more, guided me more and even punished me more. Now that I am a mother of an 11 year old, I know better.
Be cautious with your compromises.
2006-08-31 19:11:28 · answer #2 · answered by free2praise76 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Each child is an individual, each one should have limits. My kids are 14 & 16 and when the 16 year old asked for her bedtime to be changed to later then what they both had I thought about it and said sure. Just because they are close in age doesnt mean that they should have the same limits. Of course they both should have to obyied by the rules you set.
2006-08-31 19:12:40 · answer #3 · answered by WENDY G 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, when I was growing up, the oldest always got more privelages. Maybe let the 12 year old stay up 30 minutes later. As far as outside time, I say they should be in before dark, PERIOD!
2006-08-31 19:05:37 · answer #4 · answered by Gayle 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I pity you - I have raised girls and they are tough. You need to set specific privileges based upon age and trust. I would recommend that the older child maybe have half hour longer than the younger child. You are going to hear all the good stuff about how her Friends get to do this and her friends get to do that (junior high is so great) but don't give in - stick to your rules. You will do just fine have faith in yourself.
2006-08-31 19:08:49 · answer #5 · answered by middle aged and love it 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your the parent and I can see her point of view but its not always best for the kids to stay out longer then you feel is a good time, for many dangerous reason's as well as many your the parent reason's. I "hated" my mom for years because of rules as I'm sure you did as well. But now we understand why the rules were set. Stick with what you think is best!
2006-08-31 19:07:06 · answer #6 · answered by higginslove3 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell her that's the way it's gonna be. She is still to young to be able to stay out all night and all the stuff that comes with it.
2006-08-31 19:06:01 · answer #7 · answered by Carrie! 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
keep up with the curfew, give her a bit of freedom , and more responsibillities around the house
2006-08-31 19:07:20 · answer #8 · answered by free2chat_tou 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
cut both of their limits down to school and home. then see how much they like to complain about stuff.
2006-08-31 19:07:48 · answer #9 · answered by joe_smo_red 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
make it an hour difference. just that hour will make her feel more privileges. if she complains, then say nothing at all.
2006-08-31 19:06:20 · answer #10 · answered by gesswh0 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋