How can I get my 13 month old twins to share? They are always grabing from eachother. They'll scream and fight when this happens. I've tried spanking their hands, but I don't think they are "getting" what I'm trying to teach them.
2006-08-31 11:28:34 · 8 answers · asked by geskuh 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
It's pretty normal, irritating yes, but normal. I have a day care in my home and I will put the child that grabs the toy in time out immediately. It usually works for most kids, but I have one little boy that I keep that does this constantly, he's older than your kiddos, but I will let another child grab a toy from him to let him see how it feels. This works better than a time out for him. Teaches him how to empathize. Good luck.
2006-08-31 11:36:02 · answer #1 · answered by disneychick 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Option #1
Alone time with a toy or two, each child can play separately, like one is in the high chair, the other in the playpen, so they can't see each other.
Option #2
Have few toys out so they have less reason to fight over a particular toy. They see the other toy and want it. That is natural. The less there is, the less they are distracted by. Allow them to fight it out.
Option #3
Have identical toys, one each, so each has just the one item for that play period, boring, but that may work for this time.
Option #4
Sit on the couch with them, one to your left, one to your right, so they can't "take" the toy easily, after 5 minutes, switch their toys.
Option #5
Whenever they do get too mean, take all toys from them and place them out of reach. After a while they will understand that they must behave or they loose ALL the toys.
Hope this helps
2006-08-31 11:36:53 · answer #2 · answered by schnikey 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A lot of parents expect their children to share but do you? It’s hard to share! Would you loan your neighbor your new dress or car? What if you were forced? How would you feel? It's essentially the same thing for children when it comes to their prized possessions. They don't want to share them either! If you force your child to share, it will only cause anger and resentment. Sharing is something that should come from the heart. I teach preschool and in my classroom this is what works. A child can use something for as long as they want. When they put it away another child can use it. The children understand the ways of our classroom and accept this. You can talk to your children in ways so that they can see their sibling's point of view. "It looks like Emma really likes your toy. I bet she would like to play with it too. Maybe when you're finished she can play with it." These words may help your child empathize with the other child and they may share. Have your children pick out some things that they are willing to share and put away the things they do not want to share. I would also do some role playing with them. Remember not to force it. Let it come from the heart. I think for sharing to come from the heart, children need to be able to empathize. Your children may be a little young for this. Good luck!
2006-08-31 12:06:05 · answer #3 · answered by marnonyahoo 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've got 13 year old twins. Your expectations are not correct for this age. Maybe you should look into a child development book that covers this age group. I don't know what kind you like already, but there a lots of books about parenting young children at your library or book store. You might even want to get a subscription to twins magazine. Or maybe you can drop a hint for someone to give you one for Christmas.
2006-08-31 11:44:20 · answer #4 · answered by Vonnie Dee 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My twins used to do that. Its their age. The whole sharing thing got easy for them about about 2 years old. Give em some time, stay patient.
2006-08-31 11:41:22 · answer #5 · answered by sweetie_baby 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Not sharing is standard for babies this old, kids really don't learn to share until 3-4 years old. AND then, only if you teach them to.
2006-08-31 11:31:21 · answer #6 · answered by SpeedyTV.com 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Teach them to say Please and Thank you to each other. Whenever they want something from other Teach them to say Please. When they receive it, Teach them to so say Thank you. This is a humbling experience for kids.
I've been teaching this to my neice and nephew and i've noticed that it humbles them and they end up not being so grabby and are more respectful in the other person's stuff.
But you have to do this Daily until they learn to do it by themselves. Cause they don't do it automatically. It takes time to learn a habbit. I've heard that it takes 21 days to learn a habbit.
2006-08-31 12:15:15 · answer #7 · answered by jrealitytv 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Perfectly natural!! I would say that this is just the beginning of their squabbles with each other. I don't think there is much you can or should try to do, they will work it out.
2006-08-31 11:31:58 · answer #8 · answered by leolady0765 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋