I lost my virginity, is there anything i can do?

Question

Hi,

I really would like someone to help me. Im in complete depression and I dont know how to overcome. I lost my virginity to someone i loved very much, and I thought that we were going to spend the rest of our life together. In the culture that im from loosing my virginity is a major issue. He left me and didnt think twice about the state he left me in.

I regret it will all my heart, i tried to contact him to help me overcome but he didnt want anything to do with me.

Im really sorry for my innocent questions but i really do not know the answers to them. I was wondering if if my vaginal hole will ever go back to the way it was before i had sex with him. The men in our culture find it important that a girl bleeds during her first time. If i ever get married one day, will the man im sleeping with know that i am no longer a virgin just by having sex with me?

Please someone help me =( I really need some answers and im very lost.

Thanks so much

Answer 1

A doctor can perform a procedure known as hymen reconstruction. They stitch the hymen back together. Afterward, it will be as if you were still a virgin.

Answer 2

I am sorry that your first experience has left you with so many problems. I am sorry to tell you that you do not ever go back to being a virgin. As far as bleeding the first time you have sex, that is caused by your hymen tearing. It will not heal itself, but on the bright side, there are other things besides sex that can cause it to tear, so it is not a sure sign that you are not a virgin. The more important question is if you can lie to a man you intend to marry, and let him think he is your first lover. This is a difficult issue, and you may want to find someone you trust to talk this over with in person.

Answer 3

So sorry that this jerk deflowered you and left like it was no big deal. I know you're probably really hurtin right now, you have every right to be hurt and upset. Don't apologize for asking questions though, how else are you gonna get the answers to the questions you have. Unfortunately you can't get your "virginity" back (unless you play by my rules-if you don't have sex for a one year you're automatically a born-again virgin). You don't really need to worry that your husband, assuming that is the next person you have sex with, will know that you're not a virgin. Most girls' hymen breaks when they are very young, usually while horse-back riding (which is also when most girls have their first orgasm) or playing sports, that hymen's a fragile little thing isn't it? There's really no way to prove that your hymen was broken by having intercourse and I guarantee you that the next time you have intercourse it will probably hurt equally as much as the first time and it's very likely that you will bleed (again, assuming that you wait untill you get married, which I'm guessing won't be for quite a while). For right now just focus on trying to mend your broken heart, deal with the other stuff later. Good luck!

Answer 4

not much you can do now accept it and move on is all you can do
guys will do what they did to you to alot of girls for some reason guys are that way you have to be careful which ones you believe when they say that they love and care for you
as for other guys knowing then not all girls bleed on their first time however if in your culture your husband insist you go to the doctor to prove your a virgin then yes the doctor can tell I am sorry for what happened but it's how guys are
there is a procedure that recontructs the hymen but that won't take away the regret you seem to be feeling

Answer 5

Sorry aboput what happen. It seemed like he just wanted to have sex with you. Every heard of the saying "Hit it and Quit It."
I will never be like that person. If you ever get married I don't think that he would care that you are not a virgin. If he loves you, he will love you the same. If I was to marry you, I would love you the same no matter what. So don't worry about it and don't be so stressed out about it. You will find the right one.

Answer 6

Unless you goto a doctor the man wont know. If you have such major issues with your culture maybe you should address those. Your decision on who you had sex with should never be a regret and I hope one day you can see the bright side to all this. But any man who wants you will love you regardless and you deserve nothign less than everything you ever wanted. Good Luck and I will keep you in my prayers :)

Answer 7

That's so unfortunate. But cheer up, here are your options:
1) When you get old enough and make enough money you can have it surgically repaired, so it will seem as though you're still a virgin.
2) They hymen doesn't always stay intact, so maybe your future husband wont even question it.
3)Marry a man outside your culture, who won't make a big deal about a silly mistake that so many young women make.

Answer 8

Sad to say, you have lost it and it will not grow back. But that is not the end of the world. Women break their hymens all the time in sports and riding bikes etc... You can always use that as a cover story unless you decide to continue to have sex.

Not being a virgin does not lower your self worth and please do not ever think that. Just continue wiith your life and be happy.

Answer 9

Oh, sweetie. Sorry you had to deal with such a jerk. But aside form expensive surgery, medically there is nothing you can do -- once you're not a virgin anymore, you can't take it back.

Not all virgins bleed on their first time anyway! HOpefully you will find a man who loves you for you, doesn't ask questions, and doesn't care anyway.

Answer 10

My wife's not a virgin when I married her, and I also came from a very conservative culture. I just love my wife and she was never a disappointment to me. "It is one of the superstitious of the human mind to have imagined that virginity could be a virtue." - Voltaire