I recentlly found out that I was expecting. This was a serious shock to me because I thought I was being smart about Birth control but I guess I was in the unlucky 2%. I'm not to excited about it there is so much going on in my life right now. I recently decided to stop working FT and go back to school and also I am dealing with a very sick parent I haven't told anyone because everyone is so worried this would not be celabrated I am seriously considering not having the baby. I have no idea what to do.
2006-08-31 08:33:21 · 28 answers · asked by PYT 3 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Other - Pregnancy & Parenting
I'm 23 he 25 and he does not know yet. i recently found out that I was 9 weeks.
2006-08-31 08:42:43 · update #1
You have a lot of thinking to do. You need to consider the father's feelings, is he aware of the pregnancy?
I would suggest finding someone to talk to about your options. Abortion, adoption and keeping the baby are all options that will have consequences in your life, physically and emotionally. You might want to call a pregnancy counseling center.
Whatever you decide, good luck.
2006-08-31 08:39:14 · answer #1 · answered by S. O. 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You do have a lot on your shoulders at the moment! However, you should not be doing this alone. The first thing you need to do is tell the father. Since you two are in a relationship, he has the right to know and deserves the chance to offer up an opinion. This is a big decision, and is up to you and the father - you should not think about whether the fact that you are pregnant will be "celebrated" or not by your family. It is really none of their business - you are an adult. You don't mention what your "very sick" parent is dealing with (don't feel pressured to divulge it here, it's not necessary) - however, coming from personal experience, both of my parents have serious health issues and since I've had a baby (now 2 1/2), I swear she's practically the only thing keeping them alive at this point. As for going back to school, good for you! You can still go to school while pregnant, and if you can get daycare or a babysitter while you're in class, you don't have to stop going to school. You should be eligible for unemployment due to your pregnancy and going to school, and probably would be eligible for grants or financial aid. You really need to find out all your options and make a "pros and cons" list - I have found that helpful when making a big decision. There is really no "right" or "wrong" time to have a baby - usually it is not good timing (I was laid off 2 months before I gave birth). However, with a good support system (baby's father, family, friends), a bit of determination and a little luck you can make it work if you really want to.
On the other hand, there is nothing wrong with having an abortion or giving the baby up for adoption either. A few of my close friends have had abortions, and they all deal with it differently (one really regrets it, the other doesn't think twice about it). You know how you truly feel in your heart and soul about it, and either way it's the right choice to make, because it's your choice.
The best of luck to you in whatever you decide!!
2006-08-31 16:11:52 · answer #2 · answered by Andrea F 4 · 2⤊ 1⤋
It sounds like you have a lot going on right now. However it takes a long time to make a baby and you don't know what your life will be like by the time you deliver. You can do this semester without having to worry about birth and parenting. And maybe once you decide to tell your family about the baby it will give them something pleasant to look forward to after they have spent so much time dealing with family worries. You might be surprised at how much happiness an impending baby can bring to the gloomiest of situations. Good luck...and at 9 weeks you need to go get that first OB appointment.
2006-08-31 15:58:26 · answer #3 · answered by JordanB 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would just ignore all of these pro-life comments.
Your options:
Abortion - go ahead and do it if this is really what you want. There is nothing wrong with it.
Adoption - You say that life is pretty hard right now, but maybe you feel you can't get an abortion. You could give the baby up to a family that is unable to have a child on their own.
Keep the baby - you mentioned you stopped working FT to go back to school. Many colleges and universities have programs to help you out in this situation. A lot of grants, loans, campus housing for families, etc... to help you out with this.
Maybe you should do a pros and cons list? Or go talk to someone at you local planned parenthood. I would be cautious of calling one of those unplanned pregnancy lines, a lot of them turn out to be extreme pro-life groups that berate you for want or even thinking about an abortion.
One thought to think of...you say you have a very sick parent. you don't say whether or not what they have is terminal or not. If you do decide to keep the baby, your sick parent might be very happy to learn about the next generation coming along before they pass on and might be very happy to be able to see your baby.
Good luck and I at the very least support any decision you come to.
2006-08-31 15:52:20 · answer #4 · answered by Sherry 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You might consider adoption, there are many families out there who can't have children of their own, or want more kids. You might find too, that you will change your mind over time about this child. At any rate, don't make a decision in haste.
http://itsbaboutlove.org is the family services agency sponsored by my church, and is free and with out obligation to anyone, regardless of religion. Also if you have a church of your own that you go thru, ask your pastor if there is some sort of adoption or social service network that you can get some counseling thru, or if there is someone you can talk to.
I hope you find the direction you need, and the answers you seek. There are answers for you, and many people who are willing to help you in a non-judgmental manner. Good luck, and God bless.
2006-08-31 18:56:51 · answer #5 · answered by East of Eden 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Honestly, it's a personal choice. My personal choice would be to have the baby and give that child the best home and life that I could. You do have options, such as adoption, that can still give the baby a good chance at a decent life. Talk to someone you trust or go to a Planned Parenthood clinic for more information on how you can handle this.
2006-08-31 20:53:12 · answer #6 · answered by Lindsay 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Please dont have an abortion! Im 19 and nine weeks pregnant. Im a full time student and I have two jobs, I know that its hard and its a very hard decision to make up your mind on what you want to do. The best thing to do is pray about it. But since we are both at the same week, you should have seen that your baby has a heartbeat and fingers and toes. Its a baby with feelings now, and Im sure you dont want to put your baby through any pain.
2006-08-31 18:26:56 · answer #7 · answered by Ilovehim 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
please think very carefully before making a decision but in the mean time listen to this i was just like you yrs ago but i made the right choice for and i kept my baby,then later on i had an ectopic pregnancy went to surgery came back with no tubes because i had a cyst on the other one,2 months later after the surgery i maried the love of my life but a few months ago we decided to give ivf a try and guest wath 3 days ago we got the result i was not pregnant,i'm devasted right now,i've been crying since then,can't eat nothing,don't want to my husband doesn't known what do scare that i may hurt myself.but goin through all this i think god i make the right decision to keep my daugther she's 16 yrs now. think before you make any decision that you my regret later
2006-08-31 17:59:24 · answer #8 · answered by jolie minouche 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm not going to tell you that it is easy, but I will tell you that at first, I wasn't sure myself. Now, I know that my son is the BEST thing ever. My situation is different I'm married and have a good job, you will definitely need the father's help unless you have someone else you can trust your child with. Talk to him first and see what he has to say. The first year is always the hardest but even through he tough times, time flies by so quick. If you're strong which I know you will be when you see your child for the first time, it will be all worth it.
2006-09-02 01:53:34 · answer #9 · answered by ghalli01 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i feel very sorry 4 u being in this situation, i found out i was prgrant 3 years ago, i was gutted, had a new job, i was devastated, i didnt know wit to do, i told my mum she was over the moon and my bf was shocked to say the least, i did have my son & could'nt image life without him, he is my life, but for u it is diff, u have to consider whats best for you make a appoint with doc, they'l go throu all your options remember your not alone & there is help 4 u, Also there is worst things that could happen to u. Hope everything works out for u. Do whats best 4 u!
2006-08-31 15:44:00 · answer #10 · answered by kirsty m 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋