I was in a long relationship in the past and wasn't treated very well so got out of it a few years ago..now am in a new relationship...got into an argument the other day with boyfriend and he told me that my ex took all the good out of me and all he got was the left overs....I am trying to build my self esteem back up because my ex really screwed it up and my new boyfriend doesnt seem to be helping any...it really hurt me when he said this to me...I got really upset and am having a hard time getting over the comment...am I overreacting?
2006-08-31 07:24:31 · 12 answers · asked by simplyhonesttou 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
No, that was a vicious comment he made....sounds like he's a real dick.
2006-08-31 07:28:42 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are not being overly sensitive at all! I was in a very similar situation. What he did was hit you where he knew it hurts. Probably just out of anger, but still a low blow. You should talk to him honestly about it. You have been through a lot in your previous relationship. Try to keep your eyes open to what you have learned. If you don't think that this guy is treating you any better.. Move on Sweetie. There are plenty of fish in the sea.
2006-08-31 14:34:26 · answer #2 · answered by Lyrical Goddess 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
WOW..he's a jerk.. personally I believe that yeah people say stupid things out of anger..but why would they randomly say them if they werent really thinking them. And you can forgive it once or twice but talking out of anger is a habit that people take years to break. TRUST ME i know by experience. and there is no way you can change it. Maybe you should look into getting out of this relationship before you get attached and hurt again. This guy said " I got all the left overs" that means..in his mind he thinks you are used, not worthy of respect like something "new" would be, you are no longer something GREAT and innocent , guys like a virginal image at times even if you're not one..but for him to say "im getting the leftovers" means he thinks you have been used and being intimate with you isnt even that great. PLEASE move on. You seem like you deserve so much better, and there are soooooo many guys out there and there are MANY that will treat you right. Do you want to spend the rest of your life with some guy who thinks you are sloppy seconds? NO.
2006-08-31 14:38:07 · answer #3 · answered by yourgirl11 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think you're overreacting, but maybe his statement should give you something to think about. Maybe it was too soon for you to start a new relationship, while you were still trying to improve yourself. That was a mean thing for him to say, but he also should understand that it's going to take time for you to build your esteem back up. You should tell him this too because if he continues to say mean things to you, the situation will get worst. Right now, you're just emotionally scarred and he should understand that and be willing to help you during this time when you need it most. If he cares about you, he would want to help you by not insulting you or making unnecessary comments like that one!
2006-08-31 14:37:20 · answer #4 · answered by melcar12345 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You're not being overly sensitive. He should never have said that to you,and it shows a lack of respect for your feelings. You're still recuperating from your last abusive relationshp.You don't need another one. Abuse isn't always physical. It can be emotional abuse,too and it sounds to me like if you stay with this guy,he will continue to heap hurtful words on you.The best thing to do when you're trying to recover from a bad relationship is to get support from family and friends,and NOT from another relationship. You need to heal first before becoming romantically involved again.
2006-08-31 14:48:36 · answer #5 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think the first thing you should look at is: is he right, if you are going to give this new boyfriend a chance you have to be open to him and not let you past relationship hurt your current one. Having said that I don't think you should ever be with someone that doesn't make you feel better about yourself.
2006-08-31 14:34:59 · answer #6 · answered by chrissy271000 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are not being oversensitive. But you do need to look at your criteria for picking men. Two in a row is a warning. If you pick a third jerk, you should consider getting help. Not necessarily a doctor or anything, but at least pick up a few self-help books, so you can recognize trash when it walks by.
2006-08-31 14:34:31 · answer #7 · answered by Michelle C 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wish I was level two so I could rate Poster22's comment up.
He's right!
That's a shitty thing to say and words like that don't form from spur of the moment. It's a freudian slip and it shouldn't be overlooked.
2006-08-31 14:35:37 · answer #8 · answered by dreft 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
wheather its true or not, he doesnt appreciate what he has.. he refers to you as leftovers.... girl you need to build your self esteem before you get back into the dating scene .... cause no matter what there will always be someone out there trying to break you down.!!!!! good luck!
2006-08-31 14:33:29 · answer #9 · answered by yVETTe 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hell no you are not over reacting. I would tell him to f**k himself. Ask him why he began dating you in the first place if he is getting is the leftovers. What an A**! Leave him.
2006-08-31 14:30:48 · answer #10 · answered by c_69_2004 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋