I really liked the idea of relocating with my husband and two kids. But now, I just can't stop crying. I had always lived in the same area until last week. I am depressed and want to go back home. My husband even said that he would quit his job, but I don't want him to do that. He would always resent me, I'm afraid. I was excited about moving, but now, I am just SO sad all the time. I stay at home with my two kids, and when my husband leaves for work, I get so sad. I have always had problems with changes. I miss everyone in my old town and the places that are there. I thougt that everything would be so fun and exciting, but I hate it here! If we move back to where we're from, though, I'll be humiliated and will be ashamed to show my face. I mean, how pathetic is that--can't even survive for one week in a new town? My place is with my husband and kids. I know that....I am just so sad an depressed--help!
2006-08-31 07:19:39 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
My wife and I have moved at least every two years, sometimes even more often. We have moved all over the world...from the US, to Europe, to South America, etc. The only advice I can give is that these feelings that you have are feelings that I think we all get in varying degrees. Leaving the comfort of your surroundings for something totally different is very hard. So, how we deal with it is by getting involved quickly with other families through the school, or school programs, charities, etc. You need to re-build a network around yourself so that you can start feeling the comfort of friends again. The worst thing you can do is sit at home and think about how bad things are. Get out, see new things, experience new things. In the end, if you just can´t get used to the new place, go back home! Since when is it shameful to go back to those you love?
2006-08-31 07:28:32 · answer #1 · answered by Nathan K 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have been in a similar spot. I moved from a small town up north that I lived in for my entire life (until I was 31 years old) down to New Orleans with a friend to further my education. For the first month or two, I knew nobody, and I would cry myself to sleep at night. I was very VERY homesick.
Try to look at the long term goal though, not the short term. When I began to look at things in the long term, it made it much easier. Like right now-- you had a fresh start-- a new home, a new area, and a chance to make all new friends. Many people would give anything to have the courage to move to a new area.
You did what was in your families best interest, and that is to be recognized. You sacrificed for your family-- and your family will be better because of it.
Relax a little, take your time setting up the new house, put things the way YOU want them, and allow yourself and your children to make new friends, and learn to love the new area. Remember though, keep the old friends-- stay in touch with friends back from where you were living, because real friends are hard to come by and have to take time to develop. So keep the old, but make new friends, and learn to love where you are at now. Maybe try to find out the history of the area you are now at, and try to find out what makes that area better than where you were at.
It took me a while to see this, but I love where I am at now, better than where i was. Where I was, there were factories and grocery stores-- that was my options for employment, and a small community college was my only option for education. Now I attend the University of New Orleans, have made numerous friends that I really enjoy hanging out with, and have started my new life :-) Enjoy the second chance :-)
Good luck to you and your family. You deserve all the happiness that life can give.
2006-08-31 07:30:10 · answer #2 · answered by AnAvidViewer 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are not pathetic, just homesick.
It has only been a week. Give yourself some time to adjust.
Set a time (Thanksgiving?) to go home for a visit. Start now to plan for that visit.
What will you wear? Will you drive or fly? Do you need new shoes for the trip?
Make the project a little part of every day. It will give you a happy focus.
In the meantime, make the effort to make some new friends and connections in the new town.
2006-08-31 07:30:28 · answer #3 · answered by Puzzler 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know what you mean. I get homesick to. But it has only been a week. I would try to stick it out a liitle longer. Give yourself time to adjust. Maybe once you get out a little and find new friends, (who will never of course replace the ones) and find things to do it will be a little easier. Think of the old place and smile about it, not cry about it.. If after a couple of months you still cant deal, then maybe inform your husband that you think you would like to move back.
2006-08-31 07:31:49 · answer #4 · answered by jam_psb 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's going to take a while for you to get used to your new home. You have made a drastic life decision, which can cause anyone to be stressed. You have got to get out of your house. Take your kids to the park, meet some more stay-at-home moms. Go to the mall. Anything is better than sitting at home, thinking about the past. Fake it until you make it.
2006-08-31 07:31:06 · answer #5 · answered by Shoddy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What sort of activities did you enjoy doing in your old town? (volunteer work, local clubs, etc) Have you looked in to joining any similar things in your new area?
2006-08-31 07:26:28 · answer #6 · answered by daryavaush 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
maybe you can visit every one on occasions
2006-08-31 07:31:42 · answer #7 · answered by 66hamerheadPD 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋