Fighting Diper Changes?

Question

My son is just turned 3, two weeks ago. He fights me or Daddy when he needs a change. The problem is he isn't intersted in potty training at all. Dosn't want to have anything to do with it!
Any ideas to get him intersted? The other problem is that we are expecting another child in late Jan. Should I try the potty training thing or just wait until he wants to do it.

We have brought him into the bathroom with us and showed him. Daddy has showed him standing up with and without cherrios. He could care less. Do you think it has anything to do with not being in daycare. I don't believe in putting kids in daycare. I will not put him or our other child into daycare. I am staying home with them. I also don't believe in rewarding kids for going potty.

Any ideas?? Thanks!!!

I have a potty seat that goes on the big potty and he just dosen't care. I have read to him ran water, etc. Nothing! Could care less!!! And why should I reward him for something he should be doing anyway. I was never rewarded for going potty. Were you as a child? Chances are not.

He is hardly around kids his age at all! We don't know anybody who has kids and when I take him to the park he would rather play with me then the other kids. I have tried playgroups and he plays with me. And I just can't make friends with the other mom's. They are in there own groups and won't allow others to come in!

Tried big boy undies and pull ups! Nothing! He just pees or poos and dose nothing!

Answer 1

I applaud you on two counts: No day-care and no rewards for pottying.
He may never get 'interested' on his own unless HE decides there is a good reason to potty.
Is he about to move up into an older group at church for instance?
My son 'decided' (after a pep talk from me) that going into the 4-yr-old class in diapers was NOT cool. So he basically trained himself in about a week. Motivation is the key. Help him find a good reason to potty. Maybe a playmate is out of diapers and sporting underwear or pullups. Maybe 'big man' jeans just like Daddy's can only be worn when diapers are history. You get the idea.
Good luck.

Answer 2

Three is not too old to be still in diapers. It sounds like he just isn't interested in it. Not uncommon in boys. My son is almost three and is still a long ways away from being potty trained. Keep asking sooner or later he'll find a reason to try it. Don't despair.

As for the difficult diaper changes; we give our son the option to either get his diaper changed or sit on the potty. We started doing this because he never really wanted to sit on the potty and HATED to get his diaper changed. Nothing is really different except that he stands up to get undressed and dressed. It works like a charm. Plus it has the added benefit of getting him to sit on the potty at regular intervals during the day.

We also believe in the only reward given for sitting/going on the potty is a hug and a "good job, I'm so proud of you", so keep that up too.

Good luck and keep up the good work. He'll start when he's ready.

Answer 3

You may want to re-think the rewarding thing. I have just finished toilet training 3 kids (ages 6, 4 & 3 now), and the biggest incentive was a Smartie!! However, you may want to wait until after baby # 2 is born. If you don't have a problem with him being in a diaper (and later-age toilet training is becoming the norm, saves trauma to both child and parent to recognize that they just may not be ready before age 3) I would consider waiting until after the huge change of having another little person in the house. I don't believe toilet training has anything to do with being in daycare or not. Whatever your beliefs about child-rearing, they are what is best for you and your children. It isn't going to affect his ability to use a toilet or not.......he'll go when he's ready.

As for the "fighting you" when you change him....have you given him the opportunity to go "diaperless"? It seems to me that he may enjoy the attention he gets from fighting the change, if he keeps doing it. Perhaps if you took the approach that "Fine, if you fight the change, we just won't do it," he may either stop fighting you, or use the toilet. Perhaps the idea that if he uses the toilet he gets just as much attention as fighting the change, he will be more apt to try it : )

Answer 4

stop buying diapers. but pull ups and big boy underwear put the big boy underwear on him and take him and put him on the potty every 30 minutes. make him sit there for about 5 minutes. if he goes put an hour in between. if not go again in 30 minutes. use the pull ups for naps and bedtime only. he wont like it but he will get it in a week of two. you have to praise him and reward him whether you believe in it or not. positive reenfocrement is the best way. kids love loads of praise for doing good. day care has nothing to do with it my son is three and he has never gone but hes trained and this is what we did. you have to be consistent all day every day

Answer 5

usuallly boys arent able to know when they need to pee and when they dont till 3 years old or older. Also I would think that haveing a baby around he might want to be a baby again and be in diapers or. this might show him that he is grown up. have him help you with the new baby and positively reinforce him being a big boy. Kids want attention so if you give it to them while they missbehave then they think that behavior is great cause they get attention if he poops just say look this goes in the potty and show him dont get angry but when he does go potty or shows interest in the potty make a big fat deal and maybe say hey lets go get some icecream just for going potty. Just be positive kids go off your emotions.

Answer 6

Put a cheerios in the toilet and tell him to sink them or you can do what my mom did with my 4 brothers - in the summer time have them pee on a tree and then housebreak them, worked like a charm I was her trouble (pottytrained at 4). You HAVE to reward a kid for going potty. Get poster board and make a chart for pee and poo. Get a bunch of stickers and everytime he uses the potty like a big boy have him put a sticker under the correct category - my mom did this with my 2 sisters and it worked. If you don't reward a kid for using the potty like a big boy/girl then how are they supposed to know they did a good job/the right thing?

Answer 7

A reward does not have to be candy or toys. Put the child on the potty and if he goes smile and tell him he did a good job. Reward given. Make sure he hears you telling others in the household he good he was and how proud of him you are. Be patient he will learn faster if you ask him often if he needs to go.

Answer 8

When I potty trained my kids, I just said okay, no more diapers. I also stay home with my kids, so we were able to do this at home. I put underwear on them and let them run around in a t shirt. My kids do not like to be wet so after peeing on themselves a few times they quit. I also made them change their own underwear when they did pee their pants. Good luck, potty training is tough.
Oh, and Elmo just came out with a potty time movie. You can order it online. They are great for kids!!!!!!!

Answer 9

put him on the potty and read him his favorite book when sitting on it. Tell him how wonderful he looks on the potty and reward him for sitting on it for long periods. Talk about potty and spend a lot of time with him when he's on it. Encourage the fact that "big boys" use the potty and he's a big boy now, especially since he's going to be a big brother. Run water when doing it and they do have lots of childrens books and videos that seem to get them excited about doing it - GOOD LUCK!

Answer 10

Kids will go when they are good and ready. Not before hand. You can't force them to go because you want them to. And boys seem to be more stubborn than girls. Try buying some pull ups or some big boy underware and offer those as a reward if you feel you must try something. He may change his mind if he sees he gets to wear something he can control.