For a few years now I have been chatting too a man in another country?

Question

we chat online nearly every day and then there are periods when he doesnt respond for ages. he makes me laugh and i genuinely like him, we talk on the phone sometimes, only monday to friday though. he never comes online at the weekend or calls. My feeling is he is married although i have asked him and he denies it. I sort of feel like its a waste of time but i enjoy chatting to him but wheres it going to lead? nowhere? maybe i should just be strong and close down the email account and take off messenger. Any thoughts or ideas would be helpful.

we have suggested meeting up but I think its almost like a game, do we both know in our hearts that it wont happen and thats why we play along with it. Maybe we should be looking at whats wrong in our personal lives, something is obviously lacking somewhere.....

all good advice all appreciated apart from smartarse at the start.

Answer 1

I would guess he is at his desk ... bored ... and your e-mail relationship is an excellent distraction and fulfilling, apparently more for him than for you, in its own limited way. His weekend "absence" (he isn't ever actually there for you in reality) suggests he is either married or, at least well occupied.

Don't put your hopes in it becoming more than e-mail flirting ... take the advice already given by others and look locally for a real relationship ... if that is what you want.

You obviously both enjoy the e-mail flirting ... so kept in proportion ... no harm in continuing. Any meeting ( and why not? - subject to not losing your head) should be carefully planned so you are safe.

Answer 2

Have you asked him what he does at weekends? The fact that he's never on line suggests he has a pretty full social life at weekends, which might or might not be with a wife.
If you told him you might be in his city soon (you could make up a business trip perhaps?) you could probably tell a lot from his response. He might be delighted and said 'let's meet up'. Or he might back off as though he doesn't want to meet, which might suggest you are right about the married thing.
Is it a waste of time if it doesn't lead anywhere? I don't know. If you enjoy it maybe just continue to enjoy it for what it is. What I would say though is, don't lose out on other social opportunities because you're spending time emailing him.

Answer 3

I tend to be againist internet relationships. I mean, how can you have a successful relationship with someone you have never even seen? I would say drop this guy and go to your local bar or night club and scan for men there. If you really want to find a guy on the net then set up a personal and try to meet guys in your area. Good luck!

Answer 4

Difficult one really. I suspect that you probably need to pull back a little; that you've made this person too much of a priority in your life.

This conversations are all well and good, but you shouldn't let it get in the way of realy life. So unless it's really going somewhere, don't focus so much energy on it.

Not to say that you should cut him off all together unless you really feel that you should; sounds like he's a fun chap.

Answer 5

Since there is no communication on weekends, I would definitely say he is married. Find someone single to be your love interest. Up to you if you want to keep this guy for an on line friend, but by the sounds of it, that is all he is ever going to be.

Answer 6

Well long distance relationships are always a challenge. So the question remains, do you just want a friendship or something more with this man. Also, are you willing to relocate because it doesn't sound as if he is willing to. Determine what you want of the relationship and then decide accordingly.

Answer 7

nicely, i'd not study the form of lengthy submit yet i found it exciting and extreme too. So, enable me inform you what you ought to or ought to not do. chum, in the initiating, enable or not that's your own decision and do not do what human beings inform you. No, not follow even me. So, what after all have I were given to inform you? nicely, you adore her plenty that's sparkling. She loves you that's slightly uncertain yet not a lot- imagine of what you 2 have performed mutually. So, meaning she, too, trusts you and needs you in her existence. It so at times occurs that someone receives attracted in direction of a few different person- man or woman except the only whom she or he loves. So, in the form of case it turns into that man or woman's duty to reveal that she or he cares and loves. So, are literally not making her cry back. communicate to her and tell her that she ought to share each thing with you- what undesirable or good she has ever performed. carry her into your self assurance that you do love her and could do even after understanding the worst area of her existence or tale. Make her have self assurance that you in basic terms choose her to be honest to you and that you ought to do precisely something for her. yet hereafter you would not like her to have any extreme or casual relationship with that guy. Ask her to end assembly him. And do tell her that yo do not favor to regulate her, yet her existence. you want to make her existence chuffed. tell her that any one ought to right now leave her if discovered all those issues about her. yet you're nonetheless being mutually with her- it guarantees that you truly lover her. tell her if she extremely loves then you definitely now is the time that you began a extreme relationship with purity of heart and soul and with utmost fidelaity. nicely, digital mail me. i ought to signify you some more beneficial approaches. don't be unhappy. do not duobt her a lot. in basic terms be calm for sometime and word what she does. :)

Answer 8

i thing you should stop , i mean it will really not be easy initially but it will take time and that there is nothing impossible in this world.. maybe even he is facing same problem and you know when you really feel something is not going on in right direction you understand it you should stop....... i am saying Cox in my life i faced something bad but did not realize then........ so just be brave and stop surfing the net for a few months.. and ignore his calls if he called up, coz maybe if he has family then unintentionally you are coming in way of them...... u dont know you will get someone just please do not blindly trust chattin coz when you can get in to the truth..... sorry if i hurt you........... good luck god bless

Answer 9

I wouldn't fall head over heels for this guy but since you both have good communication why stop? Nothing wrong with having a chat friend.

Answer 10

Find someone who lives nearby you to date and get to know. Don't waste your time on a guy in another country who may be married. It's never going to happen.