Q What is the difference between men and puppies?
A Puppies grow up.
Q What do men have in common with ceramic tiles?
A Lay them properly once and you can walk all over them forever.
Q If you drop a man and a brick out of a plane, which one would hit the ground first?
A Who cares?????.....
Q What did God say after he created man?
A I can do better than this! And then he created woman!!!.
Q Why did Moses wander in the desert for 40 years?
A Because even back then men wouldn't ask for directions.
Q What is the difference between men and pigs?
A Pigs don't turn into men when they drink...
Q What makes men chase women they have no intention of marrying?
A The same urge that makes dogs chase vehicles they have no intention of driving.
Q Why do men like smart women?
A Opposites attract.
2006-08-30 23:17:10 · 27 answers · asked by MissBehave 5 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
Q: Why are dumb blonde jokes so short?
A: So brunettes can remember them.
Q: What do you do if a blonde throws a grenade at you?
A: You pick it up pull the pin & throw it back.
Q: What happened to the blonde tap dancer?
A: She slipped off and fell down the drain.
Q: How can you tell if a blonde has been using the computer?
A: The joystick is wet.
Q: What's the quickest way to get into a blondes pants?
A: Pick them up off the floor.
Q: Why don't blonds play frisbee?
A: It hurts their teeth.
Q: What do you call a blonde with half a brain?
A: Gifted!
Q: How do blonde braincells die ?
A: Alone.
Q: Why don't blondes eat bananas?
A: They can't find the zipper.
Q: How did the blonde try to kill the fish?
A: She tried to drown it.
Q: What's the difference between a blonde and a 747?
A: Not everyone has been in a 747.
Q. why did the blonde bring a ladder to the bar?
A. because she heard the drinks were on the house.
heres some for the boys, enjoy
2006-09-03 10:51:28 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Those are FUNNYY!!! Thank you for the laugh...
What dominates the thoughts of men at different stages in their lives:
Ages Primary Concern
0-3 Pooping
4-10 Guns
11-14 Sex
15-20 Sex
20-40 Sex
40-60 Sex
60-? Pooping
Hee hee
2006-08-30 23:30:21 · answer #2 · answered by bburgandy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Here's another, but its a story joke- I find it hillarious- wish I could suck you!!
"""Little Mary was not the best student in Sunday School. Usually she slept through the class. One day the teacher called on her while she was napping, ''Tell me, Mary, who created the universe?''
When Mary didn't stir, little Johnny, an altruistic boy seated in the chair behind her, took a pin and jabbed her in the rear. ''God Almighty !'' shouted Mary and the teacher said, ''Very good'' and Mary fell back to sleep.
A while later the teacher asked Mary, ''Who is our Lord and Savior?'' But Mary didn't even stir from her slumber. Once again, Johnny came to the rescue and stuck her again. ''Jesus Christ!'' shouted Mary and the teacher said, ''Very good,'' and Mary fell back to sleep.
Then the teacher asked Mary a third question, ''What did Eve say to Adam after she had her twenty-third child?'' And again, Johnny jabbed her with the pin. This time Mary jumped up and shouted, ''If you stick that damn thing in me one more time, I'll break it in half!''
The Teacher fainted."""
And check this website out: www.funnyjunk.com nice jokes darlin'.
2006-08-30 23:23:35 · answer #3 · answered by x_Super_Social_Superstar_x 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
great here's some more!!!
Why should you never hit a man with glasses?
Because a baseball bat is much more effective.
How do get your bloke to scream whilst your having sex?
Phone him.
Why do men get married?
So they don't have to hold their stomachs in anymore.
Why does a penis have a hole in the end?
so men can be open minded.
what do you call an attractive,senitive and intelligent man?
a rumor.
2006-09-03 11:44:32 · answer #4 · answered by thenickistar 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why do Brides get married in white? So they match everythng else in the kitchen.! What is a wife? It's something you screw on the bed to get the housework done! How can you tell if your wife is dead? The sex is the same, but the pots build up in the sink. My wife and I have only had one argument. It started on the day we got married! How many men does it take to light the fire? None, she shouldnt have let it go out in the first place! Whats gone wrong when a woman comes out of the kitchen & gives you grief?? Chain snapped
2016-03-27 02:06:25 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Whos a clever girl then, cheers for the 2 points
2006-08-31 04:46:34 · answer #6 · answered by Dazman 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What is the useless piece of skin attached to the penis called?
A Man
2006-08-30 23:22:59 · answer #7 · answered by AusPixie 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is my fav joke ever....
Q) How many men does it take to wallpaper a room?
A) Two, but you have to slice them REALLY thin!
2006-08-31 00:06:11 · answer #8 · answered by Flossie 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I guess I'd be laughing my socks off if I was a woman.
2006-08-30 23:32:31 · answer #9 · answered by Dan 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
oh my god, they are sooooooooo funny, good on ya girl! I have one you may like....
*Why couldn't the stupid man write the number eleven?........
Because he didn't know which 1 came first!"
=]
2006-08-30 23:30:46 · answer #10 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋