I'm in a long distance relationship where I live in the U.S and my bf lives in Germany (military). We have been dating one and a half years two days ago actually and seperated for eight months. I really do love him. But a couple of weeks ago he hurt me real bad by completely blowing me off by disappearing with some girls I've never met and not e-mailing me or calling telling me where he is going and for how long. I'm not the controlling type at all but he disappeared for two weeks and came back by saying "sorry I'm a guy, I make mistakes".
Thats part A. Part B is at my job theres a guy thats unbelievable attractive and I really want to get to know him better. Part of me doesn't want to throw away a good relationship on a hunch but the other is tired of the pain and the waiting. The truth is, I've had more fun with this coworker in the past few weeks than I've had in eight months. I feel like I deserve this fun. Please what should i do?
2006-08-30 16:55:37 · 27 answers · asked by Sabrina J 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I would try explaining to him about the co-worker and then telling him what the heck your a woman and you don't make mistakes. haha Being separated is tough on any relationship. If you feel that the relationship is a good one and I mean this in the way of is the loving feelings mutual, then maybe you should consider trying to salvage it. I have no idea what he is doing or what kind of mistakes he is making but they don't sound like the ones you are going to like. Part B: Part B cannot be reckoned with until you have settled part A. Two wrongs don't make a right, it only makes things harder, so therefore you should decide what you want to do with part A before jumping into Part B. Even if Part A has no respect for you, have respect for yourself by doing the right thing and what feels right in your heart. Just because he would lower his standards and character to step out on you, don't lower yourself to the same standards. Make a firm decision before you get confused by the actions of the co-worker. You will feel better about yourself, regardless of your decision. Hope this helps.
2006-08-30 17:06:55 · answer #1 · answered by Big "D" 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well ultimately its up to you and how you feel.
Obviously being away from your BF is hard and then he comes back and does what he did, makes it even harder.
It seems as if he feels or felt the same way.
Long distance relationships are always hard.
Before you do anything you should have a serious and private conversation with your BF and ask him how he feels, and whether or not its worth BOTH his and your time to keep going into your current relationship.
And that should help you decide what to do.
Don't just do it upon having fun because that is typical,.... especially when you meet someone new and you just start to know each other.
I don't know if I have been helpful or not but good luck and think before you act.
2006-08-30 17:05:48 · answer #2 · answered by Yvett 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There's no doubt in my mind that you should get rid of the military man! THere's absolutely NO excuse for him to disappear for 2 weeks, WITH GIRLS, and then come crawling back to you with that lame-*** excuse! I'm a guy, I make mistakes"????!!!!! I think not, but nice try loser! Number one, leaving for 2 weeks with a bunch of girls is not just something that happens by mistake! Number two, you should NOT lower yourself to this scumbags standards. Let him play with his little girlfriends and enjoy himself. In the meantime, what are you waiting for?!?!?! Go for the other guy! The important thing here is that you are truthful and totally upfront with all involved parties. It never pays to hide anything because chances are it will come back to haunt you in a BIG way! When bitter people have the chance to "get you", they will, so be careful. One little cover up or lie could easily be interpreted as so much more. Suddenly you'll become GUILTY without a trial! Just drop this guy like a bad habit.... exactly what he is!
2006-08-30 17:19:03 · answer #3 · answered by Shellbus 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Long distance relationships are hard, and they hardly ever last. Your man as much as admitted to cheating on you with his I'm a guy i make mistakes remark what a jerk, he could of at least apologized or at least appeared to be sorry. Tell him to stay in Germany you don't need to be disrespected by crap like him.
Go out and have some fun with your cutie co-worker, is something happens it happens if not then no biggie just two friends out having fun. You do deserve to have fun we all do, so go and get it. GL
2006-08-30 17:04:15 · answer #4 · answered by whitebeanner 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
good relationship? he disappeared and never called you, he did not say what happened. Obviously he was cheating, so how is it a good relationship? Have fun with the co-worker and forget about the long distance guy, or better yet, you can do both, the long distance guy does not have to know. You don't really know what he's doing, do you?
2006-08-30 17:13:05 · answer #5 · answered by venus11224 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Long distance relations don't work when your hearts not in it. Get on with it , don't wait on him. He's not waiting on you, besides later if things are meant to be it will happen. Don't waste your life waiting on something that may never happen. He's a guy alright and that is the lamest excuse I've heard in my life time. Take some time apart dating and make sure of what you both actually want. It could all be an elusion of love , if your seeking others.
2006-08-30 17:09:29 · answer #6 · answered by angelw/brkwingcrookedhalo 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all it doesn't sound like it was a great relationship at all. I say go have fun with the coworker. You deserve it especially after the lame excuse "sorry I'm a guy" very lame. have fun live it up who knows the coworker just might be THE ONE!! Good Luck!
2006-08-30 17:04:33 · answer #7 · answered by happy_cute_mom 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you should have some fun! This guy left with some girls and now is sorry, oh well!
Since you haven't been together long (can't really count the time not being together) and you see the flags coming out then cool things with this guy tell him you aren't willing to wait and be exclusive, he really disrespected you and you are now going to cool things down! You can still write him and see him but not only him and he also appears to need time too! Good luck and you go Girl!
2006-08-30 17:02:27 · answer #8 · answered by Cheryl K 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are the only one who can truly answer this. Take a deep look inside and ask yourself if you are happy. Love dose not hurt. All men are dogs at some point test the waters before you let one go hell he is doing it to you. And being a guy is know excuse if they are a real man they know who to act like one.
2006-08-30 17:05:29 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Go for it. You're not attached to the guy in Germany. You aren't married. Date around....that's the best way to find the person you could end up spending the rest of your life with.
On the other hand, if you really feel bad about it and don't want to feel like you are betraying your bf, then don't do it. It's up to you.
2006-08-30 17:04:12 · answer #10 · answered by royal_crown78 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋