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I love my boyfriend very much, and it is mutual. When should the engagement and marriage start? After college? He gets done in 2 years and I get done in four, but I know I dont want to wait that long. I just was wondering if maybe we should wait to get engaged and married after I get out of school.

2006-08-30 09:57:02 · 17 answers · asked by Bobi C 2 in Family & Relationships Weddings

17 answers

it depends. how often do you guys argue right now and what things do you guys not agree with and how important those things are to you. also you need to figure out if you want a wedding(costs) if you can handle a child (who knows, things can happen) while in school and working and look at each others income spending factor. have you guys talked about your values (personal and religion) and how you guys can cope with it. how honest are you guys to each other. and do you hide anything back. don't forget to talk about the way you want to raise your kids and your life style and your goals and see if that does bring any issues. depending on all of these things determines whether or not it's a good idea or not to be married while in college. however, you can be engaged and not marry for years.

2006-08-30 10:28:32 · answer #1 · answered by weirdo fernado 2 · 1 0

Look at yourself now--are you the same person as you were when you were 15? Probably not.

In the next 4 years, you both are going to grow and mature. You could grow a part, but you could also grow closer together.

Wait to get engaged until YOU are at least left with <1 semester. Planning a wedding AND adjusting to married life is hard enough. Also, you both should have a bit of independence too. I suggest waiting until you have been out of school for a year and established as an indepedent woman before you tie yourself down.

2006-08-30 10:32:50 · answer #2 · answered by FaZizzle 7 · 1 0

Don't get engaged until you are both out of college. WAY too many things change during the college years and soon after.

I'm 32, and everyone I know who got married to the person they got engaged to during their college years has gotten divorced. Better to wait now, than regret it later.

I know it's not what you want to hear, but just trust me on this one. If the two of you have any "staying power" then waiting to get engaged later will be no difficulty at all.

2006-08-30 13:33:36 · answer #3 · answered by Etiquette Gal 5 · 1 0

I see that countless human beings are telling you in case you are attempting this now you would be making a foul decision. Sweetheart, you ought to comprehend the alternative is yours. it is the single decision in existence that no you could actually come to a decision for you. I supply you props. no longer a lot of human beings have got here upon their soul mate at 20. whether, it is very lots attainable. in my opinion, i might wait until eventually I graduated. whether, If I advised you to do one among those element i may be a hypocrite. I had a baby earlier I have been given married (and specific bubbles i grow to be of criminal age to drink) and, I have been given married earlier I even finished 2 years of faculty. issues do get greater durable once you get married, yet interior the top while you're with the guy you're meant to be with then it is going to artwork. So, do no longer hear to any physique at right here while they permit you already know which you're making a terrible decision. All you ought to attain isn't any you could actually come to a decision that for you. the alternative is yours. stable luck and maximum suitable desires to the the two one among you.

2016-10-01 02:36:50 · answer #4 · answered by ? 4 · 0 0

Yes you can have a long engagement but traditionally an engagement lasts around 1 year, not much longer and not much shorter. I would wait another year or two then get engaged. remember engagement rings cost a lot so maybe you would want your BF to have time to save up, especially if you will end up changing your mind in a year or two.

2006-08-30 11:24:04 · answer #5 · answered by Educated 7 · 0 1

WAIT... just a bit. Enjoy your relationship as it is now. Plan as much as you can for your careers, and see where life takes you. If you are truly meant for each other, then talk about marriage and play around with some ideas and thoughts for your life together.
There's no "right" time... but there's often a "better" time. You need to be able to take care of each other in more ways than love alone!

2006-08-30 10:17:50 · answer #6 · answered by bethiswriting 3 · 2 0

I know this is answer you don't want to hear, but wait until you are done with school.

Most likely you will have (literally and figuratively) grown up during your time in college, and you might have changed your mind about this guy. (I know if I married the guy that proposed to me while I was in college, I would be MISERABLE.)

Also, as I was while I was in college, you will probably be broke, as in no money for a wedding, home, etc. And the same applies until you have a solid job after college.

Plus, I assume you are around 18 since you have 4 years to go, but don't you want to be able to drink LEGALLY at your reception?

Good luck.

2006-08-30 10:16:24 · answer #7 · answered by Laura 4 · 1 0

I believe at this age group like many have stated, you may not be ready for this step. If you have the support of your family and this feels right, than attend free counciling that the University may have to get a few opinions. They may ask you long term questions and talk about topics you may never have thought of. Generally the rule of thumb is "if you can't afford marriage....wait awhile till that changes..." There are bills, rent, emergencies in life to pay for...think ahead is my only advice...

2006-08-30 10:57:09 · answer #8 · answered by eurazianbeauty 2 · 2 0

You should wait. But, there's no reason why you couldn't get engaged when he finishes college and plan a wedding after you graduate. Planning a wedding is a LOT of work and even more money, lol, besides, earning your degree is sooooo important. Focus on your goals and plan for your future.

2006-08-30 10:28:44 · answer #9 · answered by terasa425 4 · 1 0

Wait a while. Things change a lot once you get a job and enter the 'real world'. Don't rush you can always marry in a year or two.

2006-08-30 11:31:44 · answer #10 · answered by bluechick 5 · 1 0

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