Hi, I am a born-again Christian. I am dating a guy right now, that is also born-again. We've fell into the sin of fornication, on multiple occasions. We both feel so horrible when we do this. I know it says in the word, if you can't abstain from sexual sin to get married. I don't want to be like, ok we have to get married. I know it says in the word, that a man who find a wife finds a good thing. Not a woman who finds a husband. However, I've come to the point that I've made up in my mind, I will not fornicate again. I will put aside my will and focus more on the will of GOD. Do you think, I've messed up my chances of us being married, considering I've already slept with him before?
2006-08-30 09:37:20 · 19 answers · asked by me 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
No, just sincerely ask the LORD's forgiveness for your error, and then refrain from sexual relations until you do get married. Good luck & GOD bless.
2006-08-30 09:43:23 · answer #1 · answered by woman of faith 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Well, fornication is a big thing....huge, actually. But I'm glad you want to focus on the will of God now. Devote your life to Him. I think that if you honestly want to be married and you repent of that sin, you still have a chance. Ask for forgivenness, repent, (meaning, turn and walk away from the sin.....never do it again.) and live the rest of your life for God, according to His will. You'll see His blessings. He loves you very much.
If He wants you to be married, which is very possible even with the situation you're in, you will be married. But leave it to Him. I know a good book about that, called "When God Writes Your Love Story" by Eric and Leslie Ludy. I think you should read it.
Btw, there is such a thing as 2nd virginity.....
God bless you.
Edit:
I see some people think that sex is not a sin. And true, it isn't. Sex is beautiful. But God created it to be a part of marriage. Don't listen to those people who say sex is not a sin. It is if you're not married. Sex is NOT a result of love. Actually, I've heard it said that if you can go a long period of time w/out sex, the more you love that person.
2006-08-30 09:49:31 · answer #2 · answered by ac28 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I'm sure God understands what is happening inside of both of you and He realizes the nature of your affections towards eachother is valid.Your sense of guilt should subside as a result of the forgiving nature of God by taking a look at your relationships circumstances.....Making love is a way of bonding with eachother and getting to know eachother,you are'nt hurting anybody else or yourselves in the process,and if you think about the way God thinks....He apparently feels the need to tell you that you should consider yourselves married under His wisdom for your time together as a couple,Not a piece of paper signed by a state.Respect Him by being responsible within the areas of sexual encounters and do'nt let it get a control over your mind.Don't feel ashamed....you're only human.
I respect you guys for feeling respect for our God......it'll all work out in the end.
2006-08-30 09:58:36 · answer #3 · answered by unmovingasp 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He might marry you if you withhold sex from him but it is not a good reason. Pretty soon, the desire changes (not necessarily in a bad way) and things may become less passionate. You two had better really like (and I mean like) each other if you get married just for sex. Sex is not a sin. Calling it fornication is manipulative and a way to make you heel and obey. If you really are suffering from guilt (which is what they want you to do), stop doing it. Not easy right? 'Cause it's natural. You'd better be taking precautions against pregnancy. If you're concerned about fornication, just think what considering abortion would be like...or getting married just 'cause you're pregnant. It is a dilemma for you, but if you are in a loving relationship...ah...be careful but enjoy. Please enjoy.
2006-08-30 09:47:51 · answer #4 · answered by smecky809042003 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Quite tormenting yourself. People have been fornicating forever, natural behavior. You appear to enjoy it, also natural behavior. Either marry the guy or move on. You are not "ruined" for the next guy. Since this guy has already tasted the wares, he may be less inclined to buy the contract.
If marriage is your objective, it may be strategically unwise to allow sampling before the contract is signed.
2006-08-30 10:21:46 · answer #5 · answered by Dane 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The best thing to do is to go to God and ask first for forgivness, then for His strength against temptation and then ask Him what you should do. The Lords sheep hear His voice, He will help you. You may have to forgoe being alone with your bf until you can be strong enough to abstain. Ask God if this is the man for you, immerse Yourself in prayer and in Gods Word and you will make the right descision. Remember our Lord is Forgiving and His lovingkindness has no measure. He knows your heart...be honest.
2006-08-30 09:58:38 · answer #6 · answered by K Girl 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sins of the flesh are the biggest demons humans face. IF he does not want to marry perhaps he is not meant to be your husband. IF he judges you based on the fact that you fornicated before marriage, have confessed and repented on your part, he is not worthy of you for judging on the same sin he also committed. Stand behind your faith and commitments no matter what, one with God and let that be your guide.
2006-08-30 09:44:11 · answer #7 · answered by Jan 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
You should get married at once. In the eyes of the scriptures it would be infidelity to marry someone else or to remain unmarried. Not to seem harsh, but your resolve to not fornicate again is worthless. You will. Unless you get married to him, you will continue to dishonor him and God. Trust me, we always feel strong several days after a fall, but in truth we are no stronger than before. Remember Paul said if you lack self control be married (He didn’t say get more self control). God has not given you the gift of singleness. Mary this man in the Lord and do it soon. Blessings in Christ.
2006-08-30 09:47:19 · answer #8 · answered by rom9_16 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋
I dont think it will ruin your chances of marriage, but hearing that you were a born again christian you shouldnt have let temptation get the best of you, right? Just ask for forgiveness and this time dont mess up.
2006-08-30 10:18:14 · answer #9 · answered by Crystal 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry I can't believe in any religion that can say what two people in love can do or not do. As long as there not hurting anyone. As far as I'm concerned as long as you a good person don't hurt anyone try and help like we do here what else is there. We don't need a building or other people to tell us this and we sure shouldn't have to pay for it. This is from an old song "If loveing you is wrong I don't want to be right"
2006-08-30 09:54:42 · answer #10 · answered by robert d 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋