2006-08-30 08:35:51 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
Send him a subscription to NAMBLA magazine.
2006-08-30 08:44:26 · answer #1 · answered by jaike 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Here is a list of questions to ask, in an innocent voice with the appearance of genuine interest.
You: Did God create the animals so that we can eat them?
Priest: Yes.
You: What makes us different from the animals?
Priest: Answer 1: We have souls.
You: If a person does not have a soul, like a brain dead baby, can we eat it? (You then get into an argument about whether human vegetables have souls if they have no brain activity. Go armed with information about the consequences of no brain activity.)
Variation: A couple of years ago the Pope decided that some animals have souls after all.
Priest: Answer 2: We are more intelligent.
You: A gorilla tested an IQ of 90. So can we eat mentally handicapped people with IQs lower than a gorilla?
Let me know how you get on.
2006-08-30 15:44:18 · answer #2 · answered by Pastor Sauce 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Buy a yarmulke (Jewish skull cap), sit in the first row, and every time the priest mentions something about Jesus being God, or Jesus dying for our sins, cough, yell blasphemy, and cough again. You can ask the priest how Jesus can stay on the cross without falling off. Ask the priest what were the names of the kids Jesus and Mary Magdalene had. If there's a large enough crucifix in your church, buy a yarmulke and put it on Jesus' head. Make fun of the "ever-virgin" Mary by taking some used condoms and putting them in her hands or at her feet.
2006-08-30 15:43:01 · answer #3 · answered by Nowhere Man 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
One day you will submit, but for now keep destroying yourself and others with casual sex (disease "HIV"and spiritual depravity) and other unmentionables. You will tire of doing the devils work. Until then keep secretly hating yourself and your life as a hollow shell. It is blatantly obvious, that you are shallow and immature and scared to death that this is ALL life has to offer. One day you will meet a Christian woman that will scare the devils out of you and you will LOVE her for it! Yeah, one day you will submit.
2006-09-01 19:16:18 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have tons of real and really funny answers, but felt guilty about writing them so I didn't. If you show up at my church, well, let's hope you do, you will be surprised
2006-08-30 15:43:07 · answer #5 · answered by Iamstitch2U 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Correct him. And after everything he says scream out AMEN. Excluding televangelists and Black churchs
2006-08-30 15:39:50 · answer #6 · answered by windfishfighter 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'd say, probably wear a "I love Satan" tee shirt and sit quietly in the first pew holding a bible and shouting "Amen" to everthing. That would probably work.
2006-08-30 15:38:19 · answer #7 · answered by Goddess of Nuts PBUH 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
y do u go to church if u dont like it u deuce
2006-08-30 15:37:59 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Eh, why bother. Skip the service, sleep in, and enjoy the day. ;)
2006-08-30 16:38:05 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
wear slayer t-shirts to church
2006-08-30 15:43:49 · answer #10 · answered by tandypants 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋