I've been kind of seeing this guy for a couple of months. He is always asking me to borrow money or asking me to buy him something. He never offers to get me anything and never asks me if I need anything. He also tends to spend more time with his friends than he does me. My children and my family think he is just using me for money (he's always around when I get paid). I like him but I think I could do much better. Any ideas?
2006-08-30 07:08:54 · 58 answers · asked by Cool Callie 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
He IS using your for your money. Dumb his as.s and find someone who wants to be with you for all the right reasons. Do you really want your children around a leech like him? I sure wouldn't subject my children to that kind of behaviour.
2006-08-30 07:13:53 · answer #1 · answered by I love my husband 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes you can see more clearly at a distance. The fact you pose this question means you know this answer already.
Now your next step (after the obvious one of dump the chump) is to spend some quality time with your friends and family. It seems like you as a single mom might feel a little lonely, possibly insecure. Otherwise you wouldn't have gone past the first loan request. It's understandable feeling alone as a single parent.
Good news! There are lots of single men out there, some even raising their own children. My experience has been that men are needing us more these days than we are needing them.
Just for fun check out some web sites just for single parents and those who want to know them better.
Also always remember, Only love those who love you.
2006-08-30 07:33:13 · answer #2 · answered by robyn o 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Usually I would say stick it out and try to work things out, but well this guy is a jerk, I have a really bad feeling about that. So well honestly you really need to break up with him. And well the thing is that make sure he doesn't come near you or your kids. Because a guy like him isn't going to go away easy, if you have to, don't be afraid to call the cops and get a restraining order. You can find somebody alot better, and remember it's you and your kids, it's a big responsibility you have there, and a guy taking money from you isn't a good thing at this very time. I mean kids are very expensive. It sounds mean but it's true, it's worth every penny to make sure they get their shots, food, cloths, school supplies, etc...
So well your income needs to be on a high level focused on taking care of all of you. Really I would suggest you hold off on dating. Try to get over this guy, and make sure he doesn't come around anymore, and next time, make sure you get a guy that is a gentlemen, sweet, and wants to be with you. Along with him not minding you have kids of course
2006-08-30 07:21:04 · answer #3 · answered by Khalil S 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes! I know that you can do better! Sometimes we as women are led by our hearts and emotions and we tend to over look the obvious-the thing that's staring us right in the face. I tend to hope the best of people and over look the obvious. But at some point we have to wake up and smell the coffee. He is using you. I'll tell you the fastest way to get rid of him,or to see what his intentions are......... you ready........ start asking him for money. Money to pay child care....to get gas....to get groceries...to get your hair done! Any thing ! If his intentions are genuine toward you he will do what it takes to provide for you. And if not get a fan so you can fan away the fumes from the rubber that he's gonna burn getting away from you!!! Good luck!
2006-08-30 07:20:51 · answer #4 · answered by "Have a great Day" 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi i agree with your family. You can do alot better. I was dating a guy for 3yrs off and on , more off. But he was always needing money, and i was working two jobs at the time. Stupid me. When i told him he could not borrow any more, he got mean, (yes he hit me.) That was the last time, i was gone. i even moved 20min away.Find someone else. Lots of nice guys out there.
2006-08-30 07:18:35 · answer #5 · answered by wHaT eVeR 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's selfish, plain and simple.
You just have to ask yourself, "Do his good qualities outweigh that one bad thing about him?" If so, carry on! But remember: 1) don't expect him to change; 2) don't "loan" him money, because a loan is only a loan if you can expect to get it back; and 3) don't give him any more money or buy him any more things than are comfortable for you.
You'll know you're doing too much for him when you start to feel resentful. So, think of resentment as your "caution flag".
2006-08-30 07:14:20 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
OH girl .. you didn't need to post this question to know the real answer. He's a looser, a leech, a lifeless limb that you don't need to carry around. Give your self a hug and remember that you're better than this. Your children are watching you and they learn by example. Put this man to the curb and keep on searching for the one that's right for you. Peace !
2006-08-30 07:13:51 · answer #7 · answered by Jana 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ideas? Yeah, dump the loser!
He's using you and you can do SO much better. Kick his @ss to the curb and move on. You've only been seeing him for a couple of months - do it before anymore time is wasted and you become anymore emotionally invested in a completely lopsided waste-of-time relationship.
2006-08-30 07:12:33 · answer #8 · answered by Brutally Honest 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ah yeah you can....do better that is!
What does you gut tell you?? Forget what your family says!
Do you believe he cares, or do you think he's using you for money???
You already know the answer to your question. I think you just wanted to see if anyone would agree with what you want.....
It's ok to be alone, it gives you time to find out who you are. Once you know you won't be involved in situations like these and have to ask.
When you start asking then you already know what you should do....
Get out while you can!
2006-08-30 07:24:17 · answer #9 · answered by Hella Woman 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He doesn't seems to be a good man to be with, especially if he's burrowing money to have fun with his friend. Does he pay it back on time? Does he ever treat you to anything? Most important, does he have a good, stable source of income?
Have you wonder why is he burrowing money from you?
It seems like you already picked up bad traits about this man, then why do you still considering to be with him? Why do you like man that burrow money from you, never offer anything to you or care about your need, and just spend time with his friend???
When is enough is enough? Move on!!
2006-08-30 07:14:35 · answer #10 · answered by thsiung 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like a lowlife to me. Some men, like my father, use their charm and charisma to get women to do anything for them. Most of the time, it involves money.
My advice - Cut him off. Make up something, whatever, as an excuse why you can't loan him money. You'll see then what the real deal is.
2006-08-30 07:11:52 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋