How can you tell when a man is scared of commitment, or if he's just playing games and want to keep his options open??
Please let me know cause I am involved with a man that is sometimes hot and sometimes cold. He was in a bad relationship before and was let down by said woman. He keeps telling me that he cannot afford to be let down by anyone else.
Should I leave him alone, or stay with him and show him I am not like her?!?!?
To leave or not to leave that is the questions!?!?!?!?
2006-08-30 06:59:29 · 10 answers · asked by Hella Woman 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
In order for a healthy relationship to flourish, both parties must enter the relationship with the right attitude. One of the things is to put the past behind you and start fresh.
He needs to come to term and have the courage to take on another relationship, he has to come to term that this is a new beginning and what happened in the past does not mean it is guarantee to happen again.
Its nice of you to give him assurance, but he shouldn't rely or make the decision base on your promise. He needs to have the courage and the strength to stand up again. Otherwise every time when things don't go well, he's gonna hide behind that veil and think about the horrific past and blame you for re-living it.
The best thing is to talk to him, let him understand that you're different than whatever he had encounter before. However, he needs to come to term with his past and know that he's starting fresh with you; for the goods and the bads. That way it will help the both of you to maintain your relationship later on; trust me, starting out right goes a long way.
2006-08-30 07:08:33 · answer #1 · answered by thsiung 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
if you like him stay with him, he obviously likes you or you wouldnt even care....if he got burnt in his last relationship,it will take some time to trust another woman again but if you stick around and show him that you do want to be with him he should losen up. give him time to get over the last relationship. (realistically somewhere between 6 months - a year.) You have to decide if you want to put up with him that long before he trust you or not.
2006-08-30 07:07:06 · answer #2 · answered by puertoricout 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Here's some insight about men. They don't like to talk about relationships and feelings. They like a girl that knows how to turn him on sexually. That's what sexual relationships are about: sex. So, if he is not always "on" around you, ask him what turns him on, and he will very likely tell you, if he feels you will not be judgemental about it. It sounds like you want a guy to be like your daddy and give you attention and love and cuddling, but that's not what guys are with girls for. They do that so they can get sex. That's the truth, even though it may sound ugly to you. Reality is not pretty.
2006-08-30 07:09:45 · answer #3 · answered by martin h 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well i was in that same kinda of ordel to me i found out it is best to fight for what you want if he is really scared to be let down agian and you are serious about being with him then i would show him and prove to him i am not his ex find out what makes him happy what is his favorite things to do , etc and do everything to make him trust you what ever she did to hurt him you do the oppisite to make him happy.. if it was me no i wouldnt leave him unless he intentonally pushed me away
2006-08-30 07:06:25 · answer #4 · answered by miss_erica_2006 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Up to you totally. Give it time, love and you be commited to him. Why? It will show him what love is and that you really aren't the one who hurt him in the past and would die before even thinking of hurting him. He come around soon hopefully and will commit to you. I hope this all works out.
2006-08-30 07:08:14 · answer #5 · answered by dave_83501 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he's that way now...then he will always be that way. True, he may marry someone but he'll always be the way he is. Most men dont change...we do though. Think about what you want and if you feel as though he will be unable to provide you might want to cut your looses early b4 you get n 2 deep.
2006-08-30 07:10:29 · answer #6 · answered by Z. 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well,talk to him and tell him your true feelings towards him and get to know his,ask him whether he trusts you and be with him only if he is reday to give 100% trust or else just move on,cos if he has moved on from his last relationship he has to be involved 100% and not hold you for what happd in the past!!
2006-08-30 07:03:39 · answer #7 · answered by country_girl 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
T.W. put it best.
I could not have put it better myself.
"Two parties have got to enter a relationship with the right attitude..."
Sums it up for me.
Go T.W.!!!
2006-08-30 08:48:29 · answer #8 · answered by * Deep Thought * 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
show him you're not like that other women
2006-08-30 07:03:28 · answer #9 · answered by Tony B 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
leave him...ego is what matters to him, not love
2006-08-30 07:20:59 · answer #10 · answered by --=mynameisICE=-- 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋