We were once very good friends, (best friends to be honest) and we had 'extra feelings' for each other, but i am the one that spilled my guts. after some time, i realized that he just didn't want me. so, i dissolved the friendship and have moved on with my world. however, he sends questions thru mutual friends, posting things (good0 about me on mutual friends' blogs...when i wanted this attention, he did not give it, but now that he realizes i am serious about my choice, (blocked his emails, etc.) he's doing tiny things to let me know he's been thinking.
2006-08-30 06:45:57 · 14 answers · asked by mariepurplewriter 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Let me also add (because there are some real idiots out there) that this ex-friend of mine was also a habitual liar and he led me on. That should help in preparing an answer vs. spouting off stupidity at the mouth. He played games with my head and my heart was already involved...I felt it would be best to stop hanging and supporting a dream that turned nightmare. If you have been in this situation, feel free to answer. If you know nothing of this situation, move on, thanks.
2006-08-30 08:05:58 · update #1
It's simple - you left. When a person abruptly changes their course of action (without notifying the other affected party) the other person is bound to do all sorts of things to win that welcome mat back. No offense girl, but if he had the capabilities of hurting you once, what makes you think he hasn't still that ability? This also depends on how long it's been since you cut him off.
2006-08-30 10:32:09 · answer #1 · answered by ? 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you think about it, since he's been inquiring about you, he's actually doing the initiating. In a sense, he's extending an olive branch to you. Not necessarily looking to hook up, but you said that you were once best friends, he obviously misses that. Start out slow so you can feel him out. Just "how've you been", "what's been going on in your life", stuff like that. The more you talk, the more you'll get comfortable with him and the conversations. If he's a good person, and a good friend-finding a lost friend may not be a bad thing. Just make sure you don't try to add to, look for, or make up something he's not willing to reciprocate. Good Luck!
2006-08-30 13:55:11 · answer #2 · answered by dct1218 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Marie..know how u feel. I once had a long standing intimate relationship 6 yrs to be exact. I broke off, due to the fact that she did'nt take steps to do the things she should had done when she had the chance. Eventually my patience give way. So years later she contacted me, our conversation ended by having a dinner date. At this point, she apologied for having taken so long in taking care of her situation, and understood my position, she asked for forgiveness... and I did. Today we do communicate, but not on the same intense level as before. Extra feelings tend to cloud our better judgments, thereby causing us to say and do things that we eventually regret. In my case I know I did the right thing for both of us. The heart is treachous who can know it! Hope this helps you. Peace
2006-08-30 14:32:32 · answer #3 · answered by Alluva52 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would it is not as if you had a romantic relationship and he cheated or anything like that. He simply did not want to move beyond friendship he didn't lie to you. You must have hurt him too. You sound like a spoiled little girl as if he doesn't want to be in a romantic relationship you will cut him out of your life. He probably asks about you because friends do care about each other. If he gives in to your blackmail and dates you. do not be surprised when he dumps you and even ends the friendship forever.
2006-08-30 13:50:49 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have the same problem. I want a serious relation ship I want kids and I want to get marrieed. I want to be loved more then any thing. Hey If you want a serious realtionship can you give me a call 308 529 2265 just tell me the ? you asked because I like to help alot of people on the net
2006-08-30 13:51:21 · answer #5 · answered by unkown 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Give it more time and avoidance maybe. I avoided by ex for a year b/c he always wanted to talk to me at least, despite how much he hurt me emotionally. If I had gave in and talked to him during that year though, it would've just been bitter and pointless. But after a year, I gave in. It seemed time and that I had moved on. The bitterness was gone and we could talk peacefully by ignoring the shitty parts of our past. Maybe it'd work that way with you too.
2006-08-30 13:49:38 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i loved my best friend who ended up hurting me. He and I went our separate ways. But we were more than friends---we were family to one another. I am now married to someone elso and we (my friend) and I resumed a friendship again. I guess it's because you can't ever divorce your family! In your case, there is potential for a romantic relationship--i wouldn't explore that, because now i know it was the cause of our rift in the first place--wo why muddle it? If he had been a good friend--perhaps the friendship could be resurrected! i cherish our friendhip--do you?
2006-08-30 13:59:40 · answer #7 · answered by hopscothchbunnies 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe at the time he was not ready or just scared... you may never know if you don't try! It may end up in something good ;)
Also, if you guys were such good friends why let a friendship go?
Give him a second chance!
2006-08-30 13:49:53 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You shouldn't gold grudges against past love, even it did not flourish. I know its difficult and awkward to face him, but then again you don't have to do anything if you don't want to.
You don't have to respond to everything he sends your way, but keeping a open mind and just keep it casual should be good for the soul
2006-08-30 14:02:19 · answer #9 · answered by thsiung 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well it depends - if you just want to be friends now too and it is understood, but don't set yourself up for rejection feel him out a little before you open up again.
2006-08-30 13:50:22 · answer #10 · answered by brokenheartsyndrome 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋