Need help understanding here. I am in love with this amazing girl but she has some relationship issues. After dating for a year, she broke it off with me, but then acted as if we never broke up. She says that the pressure of being my gf was getting to be too much. I felt it was unfair to me to be expected to be a bf, but not get the same in return. So, I broke it off with her.
Now she wants to casually date me. There are other issues here from both sides, but too numerous to list.
Essentially, I would like your opinion as to whether or not one should try to be with someone who needs fixing? This applies to both sides, bf and gf. Since I have my own issues. I am not perfect.
What would it take to say, yes, give it a third try?
2006-08-30 06:39:43 · 12 answers · asked by The Dude... 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Thanks for the answers so far. It helps, really.
When we fist got together, she had just ended a long relationship. I have a slight fuse and jealousy issues.
She feels that she doesn't like the expectations of being a gf put on her, but when they aren't there, she is happy and can be with me. Now, after the second failed attempt, she doesn't want to be in a relationship, with anyone, not even me, but would like to continue being my friend and date (but casually).
Does any of this make sense?
2006-08-30 08:42:31 · update #1
To be honest, if this relationship needs a thrid try it probably shouldn't have gotten a second. It sounds like she's playing some kind of mind games with you. Breaks up with you one second, acts like nothing happened, doesn't want to treat you like her boyfriend but wants you to treat her like your girlfriend. I would call this one quits and find a different amazing girl who actually knows what they want. Maybe this girl just isn't ready to make a commitment with you, or she's too young to settle down with just you. Either way, she's confused and for your sake.. you should move on. If you really care about her and think you two could make it work than make it work someday and don't rush into anything. She's not ready for what you have to offer yet.
2006-08-30 06:47:09 · answer #1 · answered by moonshadow385 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sound like you both need a break from one another, well for now. When you both find out what you out of life and a relationship then give it another try otherwise your going to try a 3rd time and its going to be the same situation and you'll just be going in circles. But that up to you, if you have time to waist and games to play I guess go right ahead. Good Luck!
2006-08-30 13:46:40 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I understand that you love this girl but what you need to think about is whether you actually NEED this girl in your life b/c you say yourself you have issues which sound like it's not been worked out or it's complicated. You broke up twice so what makes you think that it will work out this time? she is messing with your feelings b/c she knows you care alot for her. If she wants to casually date you then it's like saying "i like you but i don't want to be with you" and if you seriously are inlove with this girl then why drag some relationship out thats neva going to go anywhere and prolong the hurt your going to experience when she breaks up with you again. If he needs fixing then she will have to work it out herself, you cannot fix her. She's using you and will only break your heart, you can do better! Good luck! x
2006-08-30 14:21:59 · answer #3 · answered by missy minx 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Without the details it may be hard to figure out the issue correctly. There is something about you she cant give up completely. If you still like her, maybe you should sit her down and talk the whole issue over and respect her concerns.
2006-08-30 13:50:06 · answer #4 · answered by charmmer 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My boyfriend and I have broken up and gotten back together a couple of times. I think you get scared at some point, break it off, and then realize you want to spend the rest of your life with someone. Maybe she is just scared. It never hurts to try.
2006-08-30 13:44:29 · answer #5 · answered by heather_d72902 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
She's scared she must have had a relationship before that really hurt her a lot. And she scared the same thing will happen again. If you really love her and it sounds like you do don't give up on her.
2006-08-30 14:03:53 · answer #6 · answered by robert d 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
She has some issues she needs to deal with herself before she should consider a relationship with anybody. You can't fix her, no matter how much you want to. I'd advise you not to get too serious with her.
2006-08-30 13:44:16 · answer #7 · answered by CRtwenty 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It seems to me that you two are just not cut out to be together. Why keep trying. Find someone who does have allot of the same interests as you and wants to be with you as much as you want to be with her. Let this girl go, she isn't going to change.
2006-08-30 13:50:23 · answer #8 · answered by WENDY G 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
dude you can never fix a person she might lead you to believe that you did but if she is not ready for change it will not happen having being triggered by you so i think you should tell her to take time and think about the matter at hand and then come back to you.if she does not then she was not serious.
2006-08-30 13:56:35 · answer #9 · answered by Eric 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you can not fix or change people, so i suggest that you talk through your issues, so that maybe each of you will understand how the other feels,and then accept each other the way you are, and if you can`t, move on.
2006-08-30 13:49:19 · answer #10 · answered by animalloverinbama 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋