If you put a woman on a pedestal and try to protect her from the rat race, you're a male chauvinist. If you stay home and do the housework, you're a pansy.
If you work too hard, there is never any time for her. If you don't work enough, you're a good-for-nothing bum.
If she has a boring repetitive job with low pay, this is exploitation. If you have a boring repetitive job with low pay, you should get off your *** and find something better.
If you get a promotion ahead of her, that is favoritism. If she gets a job ahead of you, it's equal opportunity.
If you mention how nice she looks, it's sexual harassment. If you keep quiet, it's male indifference.
If you cry, you're a wimp. If you don't, you're an insensitive bastard.
If you make a decision without consulting her, you're a chauvinist. If she makes a decision without consulting you, she's a liberated woman.
If you ask her to do something she doesn't enjoy, that's domination. If she asks you, it's a favor.
If you appreciate the female form and frilly underwear, you're a pervert. If you don't, you're a f-a-g.
If you like a woman to shave her legs and keep in shape, you're a sexist pig. If you don't, you're unromantic.
If you try to keep yourself in shape, you're vain. If you don't, you're a slob.
If you buy her flowers, you're after something. If you don't, you're not thoughtful.
I
f you're proud of your achievements, you're up on yourself. If you don't, you're not ambitious.
If you're totally beat after a hard day, you don't give a damn about other people's needs. If she's totally beat after a hard day, she's tired.
If you want it too often, you're oversexed. If you don't, there must be "someone else".
2006-08-29 20:13:40 · 25 answers · asked by Dew Drop 3 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
Is that whining I hear? LOL. LOL.
Thanks for the laughs.
2006-08-31 04:01:20 · answer #1 · answered by jfmm 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
of course....men NEVER win....
read this
The Silent Treatment
A man and his wife were having some problems at home and were giving each other the silent treatment.
Suddenly, the man realized that the next day,
he would need his wife to wake him at 5 a.m. for an early morning business flight.
Not wanting to be the first to break the silence (and LOSE), he wrote on a piece of paper,
"Please wake me at 5:00 AM." He left it where he knew she would find it.
The next morning, the man woke up, only to discover it was 9:00 AM
and he had missed his flight. Furious, he was about to go and
see why his wife hadn't wakened him, when he noticed a piece of paper by
the bed. The paper said, "It is 5:00 AM. Wake up."
Men are not equipped for these kinds of contests.
*heres another one...*
Gone Fishing
One morning, the husband returns the boat to their lakeside cottage
after several hours of fishing and decides to take a nap. Although not
familiar with the lake, the wife decides to take the boat out. She
motors out a short distance, anchors, puts her feet up, and begins to
read her book.
The peace and solitude are magnificent.
Along comes a Fish and Game Warden in his boat. He pulls up alongside
the woman and says, "Good morning, Ma'am. What are you doing?"
"Reading a book," she replies, (thinking, "Isn't that obvious?") "You're
in a Restricted Fishing Area," he informs her.
"I'm sorry, officer, but I'm not fishing. I'm reading."
"Yes, but I see you have all the equipment. For all I know you could
start at any moment. I'll have to take you in and write you up."
"If you do that, I'll have to charge you with sexual assault," says the
woman.
"But I haven't even touched you," says the Game Warden.
"That's true, but you have all the equipment. For all I know you could
start at any moment."
"Have a nice day ma'am," and he left.
2006-08-30 05:46:23 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 2⤋
That is sooooo true. Isn't it crap!! I have to admit I do some of those things to my hubby. Well the whole when he comes home from work he doesn't give a damn, but I'm tired if I do. It just doesn't make since
2006-09-03 16:32:58 · answer #3 · answered by butterfly 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Go ahead then and tell it boy. I agree totally. Women are too high maintenance in todays society.
2006-08-29 20:20:47 · answer #4 · answered by Ice4444 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Makes total sence to me.lol lol
2006-08-29 20:28:18 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I can't disagree with anything you posted.
I don't live in Iraq, Afghanistan, or Somalia either so I'm not complaining.
2006-08-29 20:19:52 · answer #6 · answered by abcdefghijklmnopqrstuvwxyz 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Love the ending.lol
2006-08-30 12:56:06 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
true, very true.
But that's why women rule the world!
2006-09-03 14:43:02 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Men always win.
2006-08-29 20:16:23 · answer #9 · answered by ipodipod 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
They just cant wint poor little fellows.
2006-08-30 15:36:20 · answer #10 · answered by Cali Girl 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋