Jealousy - What do you do ?

Question

What do you do when you are jus down on luck & everyone around you is doing good except yourself ? you see everyone getting opportunties and when it's your turn, they jus say , too bad, no luck. No really feeling unworthy myself , just cannot accept why the other equal can get things you can't . ... You find yourself unwillingly building walls of tension and getting worse......

Why other are pretty and you have defects. Why other bf are so loving to them and yours sucks
Why does training program goes to the one sitting beside you and not you ..... and the list goes on ...........

Answer 1

Just ask yourself "What would Jesus do?" He be givin answers like you won't be believin. Have faith baby, it'll come.

Answer 2

I do admit that in our life luck plays a very important factor. Sometimes you see others have better opportunites than you but the question is did you try to grab or take the opportunity in the first place. If you didn't try in the first place, opportunity don't knock on your door. The first step you should take is to try to grab or create opportunity for yourself. If you fail the first time, never mind just try again there will be at least once you will be successful. The main key to any success is your confidence. If you lack of confidence in yourself, probably others will think the same. So be confident in approaching any problems even though you may not solve the problem but at least it leaves a good impression to others and people will respect you.

Don't be jealous about other people's good luck coz not every day is Sunday. They will have bad luck too, it is how you are going to handle the situation calmly. If you are not going to handle this well, you will always feel that others have a better luck than you. So whatever you do, try your best even thiough result may not be satisfactory but it is the effort that you put in that count

Answer 3

Start taking some risk and get out of your safety nest, what are you doing to get some of the opportunities you are witnessing?
Make a conscious effort to start making things happen for you and except that when things don't go your way you don't have all the answers! I am going to tell you something I usually don't tell anyone but I hope it helps! I relate, I asked myself these questions and worse when I wanted my son more than anything in the world and he was stillborn due to a cord accident and the guy I worked with said his wife was thinking about having an abortion ever time she got mad at him. Why???? I never will know this so I have excepted there are things that I can't change, after I thought about it for a very long time my conclusion was this was one of the most self defeating things I could ask! So know I just try and wish the best for others and except that as my journey continues my time may come and when it does I will appreciate more than most. Good luck~

Answer 4

Honey, what I am about to say, isnt' being said to be mean, it's being said because you need to hear it. These people are being rewarded for their hard work because they get out there and put forth the effort. They aren't sitting around asking God "why me?" They are living. And I'm afraid to say, you seem to be dying a slow and painful death due to your own misconceptions. I could be like you, and sit there and focus on all my misfortunes. The Lord knows I have had more than my share. My middle son survived cancer, my oldest son has seizures, I was a battered wife, cheated on, lost my house due to medical bills, and then when I thought I was getting back on track, I ended up having some major neck surgery that has left me with some major nerve damage. Oh, woe is me didn't help me. It hurt me. One day while feeling depressed and asking the "why me" question....someone said the most important thing to me. He said "Why someone else?" And then he went on to tell me that God will never give me anything that I can't handle. And that man was right. After that conversation, I changed alot of things about my life. To my surprise things started to work in a more positive way, and I'm still going. You only get one shot at life. The idea is to make the best of it, no matter what situation you are dealt with. Nobody can change what is going on in your life but you. And either you sit here complaining about it, or you get up and do something about it. The choice is yours honey.

Answer 5

You probably need to remind yourself that someone else's getting something has nothing to do with you. I had a friend once who often said, "There's always going to be someone who is better off than you, and there's always going to be someone who is worse off than you. There's no point measuring."

Something else you can remind yourself about is the line from Kenny Roger's Gambler, ".... There'll be time enough for counting when the dealin's done". Don't look around and see who has what and remind yourself you don't have what someone else has. People have their ups and downs, and you're having a down right now. That's all. There'll be time enough for counting when the dealing's done, and the dealing just isn't done yet.

It can be difficult to be happy for other people when things are so rough for you you feel as if you've been removed from "real life" and are in some kind of miserable limbo. You can wish you were happy, and sometimes any envy you may feel isn't envying the thing they have but is instead envying the happiness.

All you can do is stop measuring yourself against other people. Their having something doesn't mean you can't have something too. Their losing something doesn't mean you either will get or have something. You and other people have nothing to do with each, and the only measure you should use for yourself is your own plans and ambitions and accomplishments. Sure, you may not quite measure up to those right now; but that's what you should be measuring - not what other people have.

If the other people have, say, money to spend or jobs that are interesting, and you don't; it is easy to feel left out and feel as if you have nothing to add to a conversation with them. As a result, you could be tempted to kind of stay away from others for a while until you feel you can offer something other than complaints about your miserable situation. I don't necessarily think cutting back on being out and being expected to be able to be the same as people who have more is such a bad thing. Don't cut yourself off entirely from your very closest friends, but reducing the time when you're feeling pressured and/or inadequate is no different than if you stayed in and didn't go out with friends because you had a flu.

Remind yourself, too, that life isn't always fair. I'm not saying feel bad for yourself, but the reality is it isn't always the most qualified person who gets the job or the kindest and most decent person who gets, say, custody of a child, or the most capable person who gets the promotion. It isn't always integrity or strength or intelligence that gets anyone anything; and you just have to accept that. Its rotten, but its how it is.

Try to be happy for those other people who aren't as down on their luck as you are because in this world anyone who has anything needs to feel fortunate simply because so much depends on things like timing, luck, serendipity, or even knowing
someone. I'm not taking away from whatever qualifications someone has for something, but the reality is that isn't the whole story about who gets whatever it is.

So be happy for the friends that such an unfair world hasn't left them without. See them as your reason to know that eventually things usually work out if people keep trying. The other people have done nothing wrong and don't deserve your resentment or tension. Just think about your own aims and plans to achieve them and concentrate on keeping a positive attitude while you're hanging in there.

Answer 6

The grass is not always greener, so someone sitting next to you is going on a training course, but perhaps behind closed doors she has huge debts to worry about, just because people around you seem to be getting blessings, it does not mean that they are necessarily happier/luckier than you, everyone has problems in their life, and for all you know someone could be looking at your life and wishing they were living it. Count your blessings:

1. You are alive

2. You have a job

That's a hell of a lot more than some people have.

Answer 7

It's best just to let it go--if you spend time obsessing about what other people have, then you don't take the time to build yourself up. Success is about diligence and confidence. If you don't think you will succeed, you probably won't.

Instead of getting jealous about other people's good fortune, remind yourself that you can be that person, too. See how and why the other person is having the opportunities and make sure you are putting in the same time/effort/hard work.

Good things rarely just "happen"--we have to make them happen.

Answer 8

Hey...don't be jealous or envious of others because it will never end.

You will end up continuing to dig yourself a hole so big and deep that you can't come out anymore.

In the end, you will become the most negative and pessimistic person in the whole world.

It is really pointless being jealous. Just be contented with what you have.

Please remember that even the richest person in the world is not contented, so what is there for you to be jealous about. Be happy and life goes on.

Answer 9

Ive gone through that in one phase of my life. I just learned, that no matter what others get and you dont, wont change a thing. You just have to feel good about yourself, and not let what others say to you get to you. They succeed, congrstulate them, but never let yuorself feel down. Someday, they will be looking up to u for teh patience and willpower you had after all the failing. Thats how life is - just a test. Enjoy it while it you can . . .

Answer 10

That's hard, I know. When others around you look like everything is going their way, and nothing is working for you.

I heard someone say this once, "when you do the right things and the wrong things happen, keep doing the right things, and the right things will happen". Stop looking at others' lives and look to your own. I am a Christian, so you see I keep my eyes on Jesus Christ and God's word. I don't compare myself to others. Not as easy to do as it is to say *smile*, but be patient and do what is kind and good; God has good plans for you.

Answer 11

sounds like a song
mr song writer !
you can get paid fro that stuff you know
i work right across from capital records call then ask if you can send in a song portfolio
and a demo hey mabey the person with all the opportunities is only a shadow your chasing when you should be looking for yours
try and make your own future not follow someone elses
then youll see they will be green with envy in no time