I have been approached by my (older) coworker's son. He is married and has 3 beautiful children. So far it has been a note that he left for me and nothing more than that, but I expect him to contact me again within the next few days. I was not attracted to him at all, and he is not my type, but somehow the cliche` "forbidden" idea has gotten to me... now it is sounding better and better. I do NOT want to follow through with it, but I don't have much willpower. If he keeps asking, I am afraid I will become more attracted to him. How can I stop this now?? It's not like I can just call him because I don't want his wife to find out because I don't want to hurt the family....
2006-08-29 16:37:48 · 21 answers · asked by marge0002 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Oh for the love of Richard Nixon, will you just grow a pair. Do you like being a pushover?
2006-08-29 16:41:41 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think that instead of gently resisting his charms, you should be direct and let him know up front that you are simply not interested. Anything less than a direct rejection, will likely encourage him to keep persuing you until you give into the lure of the "forbidden" which you yourself have admitted might break up a family, which you have indicated you do not want to do.
We all face temptation, but it boils down to the stregnth of your character. Which carries more weight, your lust for a forbidden affair or your concern for the potential consequences to the man's family? Addtionally, please consider what some of the other people have said: it is YOU who will be hurt emotionally in the end when it's all over.
2006-08-29 17:05:31 · answer #2 · answered by Leroy 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You need to resist the temptation - there are too many risks involved in this situation for both you and for your coworker's son. Many people will be hurt by this situation - most things like this do not work out! If I have not convinced you yet, at least stay away from him for his children't sake. They do not deserve to encounter a situation like this at such a young age. Finally, no offense to your coworker's son, but shame on him for approaching you in this manner when he has a wife and children at home. That should be reason enough not to date this man. Good luck to you, I hope I have not offended anyone.
2006-08-29 16:44:13 · answer #3 · answered by Kristmas 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The next time he contacts you, tell him flat out that you are not interested. If he persists, don't let it get to the point where you wear down. Talk to your co-worker (his parent) about how uncomfortable this makes you. While it may cause family problems, that's not your problem.
It's better to reject him and get him into trouble on his own than to be the other woman and get dragged into the family problems yourself. The parent can then decide how to handle it. They may bring it up to the wife, they may just confront the son. Whatever happens, make sure you stay out of it.
2006-08-29 16:44:05 · answer #4 · answered by welches_grape_jelly 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He. Has. A. Wife.
Imagine if you had a husband and three beautiful children. Imagine that you loved your husband and trusted him. Now imagine that he cheated on you with a co-worker, destroying your family, shattering your trust and breaking your heart.
It wouldn't feel good, would it?
If you really don't have the willpower to resist his "charms," (in quotes because he doesn't sound particularly charming to me) then you need to re-examine yourself. Surely you're a better woman than this.
Don't be that woman. Don't be a ho.
2006-08-29 16:42:32 · answer #5 · answered by Lanani 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
OK, you don't want to hurt the family, hold on to that. Remember, if you do sleep with him, you have hurt the family, maybe not directly, but they still get hurt. You want to turn him away, just ignore him, if he continues to persist, maybe tell his dad. If he still trys to get to you, you may have no choice but to tell his wife. Oh hey! how's this, threaten to tell his wife, and then remind him of the note he left you, dumb move on his part, and tell him that you can and will show his wife. If he's smart, he'll stop right there.
2006-08-29 16:48:22 · answer #6 · answered by Mr. Right 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are old enough to work, you are old enough to have some sort of moral fiber and maybe even a little backbone.
You already said he was not your type, you were not attracted to him and that is AFTER the ultimate "kiss of death" - that he is married. Gently discourage the whole thing. If gentle discouragement does not work, simply let him know that you are not interested.
If you have any brains, you really ARE NOT interested.
2006-08-29 16:43:20 · answer #7 · answered by Road Warrior 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Just give me his name and phone number and i will call his wife and children tomorrow, that would take care of your problem...don't mess with another woman's man, and don't mess up his marriage and family life just because you feel you need to get off and explore the forbidden...if you were the kind of woman my husband was around i would kick your a$$ just for asking this stupid question...enjoy your life in HELL, that's where your headed....
2006-08-29 16:44:47 · answer #8 · answered by tiffani h 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Remind him and your self that he has 3 children to think about. Why would you or he risk hurting the kids or his wife. You could even talk to your coworker and have him/her talk to their son.
2006-08-29 16:43:41 · answer #9 · answered by jagbeeton 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Tell him a story about an imaginary friend who got busted and lost everything. Then tell him you are going to keep the note forever.
2006-08-29 16:41:05 · answer #10 · answered by teef_au 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋