this is what a girl I like emailed me, its obvious that she doesnt want to be more than friends, my question is, is it because she doesnt like me like that,? because she sure used to act like she liked me, and then she backed off, as if she was scared, but i think if she didnt feel anything at all , she would not have put the part about, ruining a frienship in there, please help??
hey,
well first of all, I don't hate you. second, I haven't been avoiding you either becuase its not been just swimming that I've been busy with its been life.I also haven't been beating around the bush because you never asked me if I did or not. But I haven't ever thought of being more than friends with you because we've always been good friends and I think thats how things should stay.I just don't want to ruin a friendship.hope you've had a good day, and i will talk to you later
2006-08-29 13:33:12 · 14 answers · asked by how many 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
What i get from this letter is she just wants to be friends nothing more because she doesn't really have "relationship" feelings for you. Now two or three years down the road she may have realized what a great things she let go. But if i were you right now i'd just move right on and forget about her as a relationship.
2006-08-29 13:38:36 · answer #1 · answered by kshaw91 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The best advice I can give you is to continue being a good friend with no pressure. Don't talk with her about being a couple. It's obviously putting too much pressure on her. Let things happen naturally. If you push the issue now then it will ruin any chance you had of becoming a couple and your friendship. She might not be ready for a romantic relationship. I didn't have my first boyfriend until I was 19. I could have very easily I was just simply terrified. She may be the same. I should also tell you that my first boyfriend was a boy who I was dear friends with for a few years before we dated and became a couple. Give her some space. She might be like me. If she is then be thankful because (not to toot my own horn but...) we aren't that common and once we do commit we are wonderful partners. Good luck to you and God bless!
2006-08-29 20:42:59 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
well honey a girl like that ain't worth it u know move on cuz there are other girls in the future u can date it is ok nothing wrong with that after all she played u and manipulated u so whatever it is be cool if she wants to be ur friend then that's ok but if not just back off obviously she's just being someone she's not she's not interested and a girl like that would u ever date?
Boy just move on and be done with cuz not even a good firend would ever do such a thing like that right? You can't just let her hurt u like that but if she's everything to u try to talk to her and see what the problem is speak ur mind.
2006-08-29 20:49:20 · answer #3 · answered by Shirley l 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh my, i hate to break this to you, but the line "we've always been good friends and I think thats how things should stay.I just don't want to ruin a friendship." IS SOOOOO common, and it means one thing. She doesnt want to sound mean and have you think she's a b*tch, and she still intends on being your friend, but she doesnt want to be with you. I know, becuase i've used that line myself. Sometimes you dont want to hurt someone's feelings, and you say something which says if we dated, it would ruin our friendship, and i dont want to risk that (AKA- i dont want to go out with you. sorry! lets just be friends). Good luck pal. Try to forget about her. She isnt worth your time, becuase someone better WILL come along. You need not worryyyy!!! Try going out with some other girls. it will help u stop thinking about her....(hope i helped!!)
2006-08-29 20:41:00 · answer #4 · answered by heartbreaker2377 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You two seem to have some issues that needs to be worked out between the two of you instead of asking total strangers. Sometimes asking us for advice is good, but not this time. If person A don't want a relationship with person B, then no matter how hard person B tries, if Person B did convinve person A to try the relationship out, it wont make person A love Person B any more our less than before they made the decision.
2006-08-29 20:40:46 · answer #5 · answered by foreveready 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She's probably just scared and has probably been "avoiding" you because of that. She's told you that she doesn't like you "like that", and whether that's true or false, you have to respect what she has said (for now) and try and move on. It's going to be hard (and at times, impossible!) but you just have to keep yourself busy and hang out with friends to take your mind off of it.
If she wanted a relationship with you, she would have told you then: I think she's just too young to really know what she wants, and that's fine, so you owe it to her to not bug her about it all.
Sometimes, girls can give off the impression that they "like" you in a romantic way, but it is often misunderstood by us guys. I recall a number of times that I've been POSITIVE that a girl liked me more than a friend and have been stunned (and rejected) when I've found out it was just nothing. I think that girls, unlike guys, aren't as clear about giving out their "romantic" signals and you've got to be careful when trying to figure out how they feel.
As for the "ruining the friendship" thing, that's recognised nowadays as code for "I just don't like you in that way." Sometimes it doesn't mean that, but most of the time it does. It's a nice way that girls have found to let you down easily - if only they knew that we'd figured out what it meant, huh?
Dude, my personal advice is for you to just forget about this girl for now and try and be happy just being her friend (and if that's too hard, then, maybe you're going to have to back-off all together?) It's always sad when stuff like this happens and I've experienced it a number of times and it is the most awful feeling in the world, but there's nothing you can do.
Who knows, maybe she'll come around eventually, and then it's YOUR choice to decide whether you want her or not.
Oh, and don't forget:
If somebody doesn't love you back, it isn't such a crime.
So, just try and see it from her perspective too.
2006-08-29 20:45:44 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
She was probably just playing around when she acted like she liked you. Plus, you could have been too accepting and needy for her at the time. Chicks are like some guys; they like a challenge, they don't want the easy person. Don't be so easy. Hey, there are plenty of girls out there. Remember how the jerks always seem to get the girls? That's one reason why.
2006-08-29 20:37:40 · answer #7 · answered by merlin_steele 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Remain friends with her, that is the only sure-fire way to keep her in your life.
Love is a rose but you better not pick it
It only grows when it's on the vine
Hand full of thorns and you know you missed it
Lose your love when you say the word 'mine'
2006-08-29 20:41:28 · answer #8 · answered by johnnydean86 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why can't a girl be very friendly without guys thinking it's more then friendship? Be grateful that you have her for a friend and move on.
2006-08-29 20:43:33 · answer #9 · answered by sweet_thing_kay04 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry, she is not into you. It almost sounds like she never thought of you as bf material. We women/ girls like to flirt with guy friends, doesn't mean we want them as bfs or anything more.
2006-08-29 20:42:53 · answer #10 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋