delayed and attends a day program. The case manager keeps wanting her to be MORE sociable. I agree that she has a problem with sociaizing but what is so wrong with having 1 person to talk to? She has managed to find that one that will talk to her. She has tried to get other kids to do some activity or other with her but they always refuse. While I realize the other kids have problems too, it seems almost unfair for the CM's to be making a big deal about my duaghter not being a 'social butterfly' when the other's aren't either. So I (we) are here to ask what you think?
2006-08-29 13:29:40 · 10 answers · asked by helpme1 5 in Health ➔ Mental Health
As the parent of TWO children who had Disabilities -- I can say this ...
RELAX -- and tell the Case Manager to back off. LET the CHILD find their own happy medium and make friends on their own -- that is the way they will build skills. YOU need to STOP WORRYING about this -- to force your child to make MORE friends won't help -- in fact, it may actually set them back behaviorally in their therapy plan.
2006-08-29 14:36:59 · answer #1 · answered by sglmom 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If she doesn't want to be more sociable, I see no harm in her not being. I only had one or two close friends most of the time when I was a kid, and I was pretty happy that way. Even now, I get along well with most of my dormies and classmates, and talk to people when I need to, but I'd usually rather be by myself. It's not because I can't interact with people, I just don't like to. And I see no reason why your daughter shouldn't be allowed to do the same thing.
If she wants to have more friends and the other kids won't include her, that's a different issue. In that case, you might want to consider a different day program, or some other, less extreme modifications to her day that would facilitate making friends. But it's still not that she's doing anything wrong. If kids want to make friends, they'll usually talk to people. If they don't, they won't. There's nothing wrong with it either way.
2006-08-29 20:39:06 · answer #2 · answered by EmilyRose 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I work with developmentally delayed/disabled kids...I think if your daughter is happy with having one friend to talk to (i'm assuming its a friend and not a family member) that is great, but its also important that your daughter learns how to interact with others apporopriately in different social situations...social skills are extremely important to have as children get older and will become a key factor in the future if she wants to have a job and be an independent adult.
2006-08-29 22:50:56 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I agree with you. I think that some kids are less social then others. It's definitely not unusual to gravitate towards one person and be satisfied with that person as a friend. It also sounds like she is not opposed to doing things with other children. The only problem I can see is that your child might be bored, sad or lonely on days when her friend is not around. That might be the concern that her CM has.
2006-08-29 20:40:21 · answer #4 · answered by Shishi 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that she should have some after school activities that would involve her. Tell the people that she doesn't have to be more sociable unless she wants to be. Get her involved in an activity where everyone is doing the same thing. Karate, dance, whatever she wants to do..
2006-08-29 20:33:09 · answer #5 · answered by PreviouslyChap 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It does NOT matter what the others are in terms of social butterflies. YOUR daugther needs to know how to deal with other people. Forget about the others.
The CM's are trying to look out for YOUR daugther. They are also trying to help the others but their plight is independent of your daughters plight.
(whatever a CM is.)
tom
2006-08-29 20:37:56 · answer #6 · answered by a1tommyL 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes when it is our child we feel that they are being treated worse than those "other " children . Maybe you should ask the case worker to sit down with you and discuss the problem . Most times confronting the problem head works the best.
2006-08-29 22:16:09 · answer #7 · answered by Geedebb 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is always better for kids to have more than one friend, but it is also not helpful to try to push them into it before they are ready.
Perhaps it would be better to encourage co-operative games and such at her day program that encourage the students to work together to a common goal. These can be done at a level that suits their challenges.
I hope that helps.
2006-08-29 20:34:35 · answer #8 · answered by Loulabelle 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I say the CM should back off. Different strokes for different folks. Not everyone is outgoing. Tell them to let the poor kid be. One good friend is worth 100 acquaintences.
2006-08-29 20:34:58 · answer #9 · answered by lindagreendogs 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
some people just arent social. dont push it too much or youll do more harm than good. im sure you dont want her to become a recluse. besides, geniuses are sometimes socialy withdrawn. throw THAT in their faces, hmph.
2006-08-29 20:41:43 · answer #10 · answered by ---- 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋