Would you end your relationship with your kids if they are abusive towards you?

Answer 1

I would get into counseling.

Answer 2

This is an interesting question. It all depends on what you want to achieve.

1) If you want to make their lives difficult, of course stay connected.

2) If you are waiting for a convenient time to kill them, you should stay connected.

3) If you want to cause terrible problems in their marriage, or other relationships stay close.

4) What are the answers to these questions:

a: If I were abusive toward you, would you end the relationship?

b: If your doctor was abusive towards you, would you end the relationship?

c: If your sister was abusive towards you, would you end the relationship?

d: If your kids are abusive towards would you end your relationship?

But you don't want to, and you want us to tell you that you are right. It all depends on how bad the abuse is and how much you want to take. Frankly I have a real short rule for abuse, and I won't take it from anyone.

Pete

Answer 3

As a mentally-abused and quasi-physically abused child (let's just say I got my a** beat for just being a kid), I chose to "try" and work it out with my parents even though at times I felt like cussin' them the f*ck out and vanishing out of their lives. Unfortunately, they saw no wrong in what they did, so it was difficult for them to be helped or help me. Then one day, after seeking and seeking, I learned through an alternative healing system to take 100% responsibility for whatever had happened in my life with regard to them and everything else. It's big step in this world of blamers, I know. But would you rather be right or be free? www.hooponopono.org. Peace...

Answer 4

Verbally? Physically? What do you call abusive? Without more info, I can't say.

Unless my life was in danger, I wouldn't end my relationship with my kids. But I'm a mother. What can I say?

Answer 5

If they are willing to go to counseling, I would give it a try. But, you should never let your kids run over you. You should stand your ground and you should be able to say how people can behave in your home. Examine yourself also and just see why your children are so angry with you. If it is over something in the past, apologize and maybe they'll get over it. If not, stop talking to them so much. My dad was very verbally abusive to my mom and I held a grudge for years. When I was grown, he apologized and he was real. He meant it. Now, we get along great.

Answer 6

No, they are my children. If they were abusive to me I would first have to reflect why, what did I lack in my parenting for them to act that way, was I not strict enough, or did I not give them enough attention? Then if they were still under 18, I would make them go to family counseling. If they were over 18 and living under my roof they could have a choice of going to family counseling or hitting the bricks. Children have got to be taught to respect, it is not instinctual and it is up to the parents to teach them and talk to them and take the time to delve into what's going on their lives.

Answer 7

Well age of the children comes into play with that. If they are under 18 then counseling comes into play and theres no excuse for endig a reltionship regardless of the childs actions becuase they still need their parents to guide them. If they are over 18 and counseling and tlaking to each other hasnt't helped then yes.

Answer 8

Define "end"

and

Define "abusive"

Do you mean never talk to them again and write them off ??

And by abuse...do you mean they were "disrespectful", they called you names or they smacked you?

It depends...I think it would take an aweful aweful lot for me to "end" a "relationship" with my kids...then again...I wouldn't tolerate abuse of any kind from anyone in the first place...

Answer 9

No, but I would want to find out why they are angry. Is there something in the nature of the relationship that needs to be addressed? You would really need to look at the history of the relationship to determine what to do. Counseling would be advisable. But your children will always be your children.

Answer 10

There are people who define abuse as their children telling them the truth about their own realities and as their children not being available on the parent's schedule. There are people who shrug sheepishly when their sons punch them. There are people who abuse their children emotionally and have always abused their children and when their children act like they were taught to act, the parent finally gets it, calls it abuse, and doesn't want any part of it.

Bottom line: we all have the right to protect ourselves and to live as we choose, so long as we don't hurt others. You can set any standards you wish with your children.

For myself, I can never imagine my children being abusive to me. I've never hit them, I've rarely yelled, and we've all learned to talk about things. If one of them suddenly 'went crazy' and assaulted me, I'd probably call the police. Whether the relationship was severed would depend on how things went from the assault on.

Answer 11

If they wre abusive they would have counseling. I would not tolerate that kind of behavior in the first place. They would be sent to a military school to get their butts straightened out, but I would not give up on them.