I'll be turning 18 soon...it's senior year, so college is coming up soon as well... and I'm worried about my mother... she's always been neurotic and overprotective, and I know she's going to have trouble letting go... especially since I'm the firstborn... how can I explain things to her so she can get through it easier?
And please, no stupid answers like "SORRY HUN THANX 4 TEH 2 POINTS LOL", I'm not in the mood.
2006-08-29 12:07:30 · 14 answers · asked by kea33w 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
For the first time on Yahoo Answers, I feel like I'm getting a lot of good answers, with no clear winner for "best answer", so I won't be picking one. Thank you all.
2006-08-29 12:42:12 · update #1
I assume she knows you are headed off to college. She will probably cry and give you a list of 1000 things not to do. Just smile and tell her she doesnt have to worry about you. Assure her she raised you right and you will make good decisions. Call her at least once a week for a while. There really isnt any way to ease the pain of leaving home. Just keep telling her how much you appreciate the good raising and you will call her if you have any questions. Moms like to hear that. Thats what my son told me as he left for the Marines. I still worried. But every letter assured me he was ok so write her when you can or call or email if she can. Just let her gush and fuss. It will be over soon. You are a special child to even care how your mom feels. She really did do a good job with you. m
2006-08-29 12:20:14 · answer #1 · answered by Mache 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
that is a tough one. Most of the time moms are ready to let go cause kids make so much trouble their teen years (at least later teens usually). I am not sure there is any easy answer for you. Maybe just start talking to her about it now, bring up the subject once in a while saying things like, "when I go off to college..." and just keep that up all year long. Hopefully she will be more prepared by then. I have to say I was ready for my first two to go because they were trouble, but now my baby is a totally different story. It may not be as hard on her as you might think either since you are the oldest and she will still have others at home to take care of.
Good luck!
2006-08-29 19:16:03 · answer #2 · answered by hopetohelpyou 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, you can start by taking to your Mom to let her know that you will be going off to college. Then spend as much time with her as you can, but also make plans and be somewhere else. That way, she still spends time with you, but is also starting to get used to you being away. Then, when you do go away to college, let her know how you can be reached and when you can be reached. This is important because you wouldn't want her to worry that you couldn't be reached because you're in a class. Another thing you could do is write your Mom hand written notes or even full letters; that could be a summary of what you've done for the day, or even the week. Come to think about, you could even start that hand-written note thing now so that you get into the habit of writing it so your Mom can count on it.
Hope it works out for you!
2006-08-29 19:32:38 · answer #3 · answered by batch93 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't know an answer as the first born is something so hard, It's the first time for us too as parents. I am the oldest of my sibling and I always hated it so I try to remember that when it comes to my children but it dosen't always help. As with my eldest it was a learning time for me too! I also have a special relationship with my eldest. It is really hard for me to just let go, it is in my nature to want to protect my "baby" We know you are capable and mature but no matter what you say to us we will still worry and it will be hard. Please promise and follow thru to call every week at least once.Let her know how you are doing and how school is. Come back and visit especally for the holidays! Reassure her you are aware of the dangers and you have common sense and will be safe! Just have patients with her too! This is a major step in life for the both of you and it can be a rewarding change not a bad one, it can bring you both so much closer as well! make sure she knows that you love her!
2006-08-29 19:21:04 · answer #4 · answered by Rocky C 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm so sorry to hear you going through this, it's had to be very tough growing up.
I'd just sit her down and have a heart to heart with her. Tell her you love and respect her, but it's time for you to further your education and grow up. Let her know that you're planning on staying in contact with her, you're not running away, and that you'll come home as often as possible. You've got other siblings who can take your position in the family. Best of luck!
2006-08-29 19:25:05 · answer #5 · answered by swrong 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Let her know that you feel she's been a wonderful mother and you will carry the lessons you've learned from her with you forever. Tell her that no matter where you are and what you're doing, she'll be in your heart and your thoughts. Reassure her you'll be ok and that you are ready to go out into the world. Because you sound like a sensitive, caring person I'm sure you do fine. Hopefully, she will also!
2006-08-29 19:24:53 · answer #6 · answered by 60s Chick 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It is quite hard for many parents to see their children go off to school. I think the best thing at this point is to talk it out. You get the feelings "out on the table" and explain that millions of children are released into the wild for secondary education. Explain by seeking a college education, you want to get the best experience so that you can provide for the family, as your parents did. Getting this all out in the open, will help lessen the release later. Good luck.
2006-08-29 19:16:44 · answer #7 · answered by Country Boy 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Look, you're just moving out, you're not dying! She's not losing you, actually she should be happy! See, for me, my teenage years were NOT good between me and my parents (as is with most families).. once you are an adult, out on your own, having to cook for yourself and do your own damn laundry, you appreciate your parents sooo much more! I'm 20 now, and I get along with my parents way better than when I was a teenager, and actually spend more time with them too! She'll get through it, things are going to change, but probably for the better. Just make sure you remember to call your momma when you are away at college. (and don't do stupid things that will give her a reason to worry!)
2006-08-29 19:16:11 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
well thats what all moms do is have trouble letting go of their frist born trust me I know. I'm 28yrs old and I tried to move out after high school graduation but mom wouldn't let go and would find reasons for me to stay which made things even harder but she fianlly let go. Just make sure you keep in touch ALOT cause I think it helps moms cope if you still keep in touch. They are always going to worry and be protective no matter how old you are but just let mom now that everything will be ok and you'll keep in touch cause she is still you mother. But it is hard at first for moms but it slowly gets easier and it doesn't bother them as much. Hope I helped you. But just set and talk it out with mom and that will ease it some.
2006-08-30 08:40:26 · answer #9 · answered by April 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Being a single parent whose only child went away to college I can understand your concern for your Mom. Assure her you'll check in daily and do it. As time wears on you can lessen the contacts until you reach a comfortable schedule for you. She will adjust so long as you keep her posted on how you're doing. Its the loss of contact I suspect, that she may fear. My son just graduated with his Phd so I've been through it-for many years-you may find you'll become closer as she realizes you're becoming a responsible adult. Hang in there and stick to your guns, your education is one of the most important things you'll ever gain-and it can never be taken away from you. Good luck
2006-08-29 19:18:33 · answer #10 · answered by dibaby 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋