A friend and I are planning a vacation together, but we're running into "issues." He's a manipulative guy who can't tell the truth about anything. We each picked out a city to visit during the trip. We both agreed on a budget for lodging, but he's coming up with reasons and excuses why we need to spend more on his city. But, he insists that we stick to the super economical budget for my city, which he's not crazy about going to. This is ridiculous. Every little increase in expense for his city is validated with, "It's only a little bit more. We should do this b/c we get a better/ more/ closer blah blah blah." And to every increase in expense I suggest he says he needs to save money.
How can I let him know his style in handling things isn't working and needs to change?
2006-08-29 11:58:54 · 11 answers · asked by rrr ttt 1 in Travel ➔ Travel (General) ➔ Packing & Preparation
Just be honest and tell him straight forward. If you dont I see a very miserable trip in store for you.
2006-08-29 12:02:51 · answer #1 · answered by shirley e 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ok, so here's the deal. All you have to do is this...maybe you've already made travel & lodging arrangements that you can't or don't want to change. That's a pain...I don't blame you. HOWEVER, just because you're friends doesn't mean you're joined at the hip. If you want to and need to stick to a budget then do it. When it comes to dinner, you DON'T need to eat at the same places or share in the same sightseeing tours...If he gets to be a pain...all you have to do is stick to your guns...and if he doesn't then just say ok, I'm going to dinner and I'll meet up with you in 2 hrs. back at the room or the lobby. Remember, it's YOUR vacation don't let someone spoil it. And if he starts wanting to "upgrade" tell him ok, let's put it on your credit card. "I'll pay ya later". Funny how that always works. Remember the golden rule about "manipulation" ...You are only manipulated if YOU allow it. The magic word is "NO". Learn to use it...it prevents alot of headaches.
2006-08-29 12:07:50 · answer #2 · answered by punchie 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you haven't left yet cancil the trip your going on a vacation not a ego tour for your freind. Tell your "freind" that he's the reason why your not going and that you want to have a good time not fold to his agenda and if that dosen't work find a new freind your going to anyway after a trip like that!
2006-08-29 12:04:52 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can't change him. That is who he is.
And it is obvious by his actions that he doesn't respect your thrifty habits. Not a good combination.
If he's a boyfriend, get outta that relationship quick - because that is how the rest of your life will be... bickering over what he gets and what you don't. Total lack of respect for your ideology.
If he's a friend, remember this proverb:
"Every good deed shall not go unpunished"... don't try to do your "friend" any favors by being a friend to someone like that. Friends like that always make sure to punish you for being who you are - which is usually better than them... the proverb is about these types of relationships.
2006-08-29 12:09:24 · answer #4 · answered by nuovoterra 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tie the jerk up and spend his money. Honestly, say "Im spendind the same amount on both cities", I have no problem staying in these extra places as long as it comes from your wallet. If he wants more, the best answer is " I don't have any more...I budgeted for what we discussed earlier"
:)
Hope all goes well with this jerk:)
xo Honey
2006-08-29 12:08:13 · answer #5 · answered by Honey78 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him just like you said it here. By the way if your having problems planning the trip the actual trip is going to be hell.
2006-08-29 12:02:26 · answer #6 · answered by DVSKITTEN 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you are able to consistently tell him which you have reached the final analysis on your funds and that if he provides anymore you basically won't be in a position to flow. He sounds selffish to a factor. it is likewise possible to settle directly to %. yet another chum to proportion your holiday with.
2016-11-06 01:31:42 · answer #7 · answered by mcthay 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to lay down the law and say "we spend the same in each city, or I'm not going anywhere."
2006-08-29 12:03:20 · answer #8 · answered by btownridgerunner 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like a disaster waiting to happen. Don't go, avoid the stress.
2006-08-29 12:03:18 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are going on this detailed and long a trip with a manipulative "friend", WHY??!!
2006-08-29 12:01:56 · answer #10 · answered by catintrepid 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋