HELP!my daughter is so bad!my boys are great i have tried everything but she is so mean.?

Question

she has a nasty mouth to everybody and i keep her home all the time, 4 months sometimes and she will start to act good but the first time i let her out she ends up findin someone to beat up, when i punisher her she laughs even if i spank her, i tried every trick in the book but the girl is so greedy and mean i sometimes want her out of my house cuz she is so mean. did i mention she is only twelve and beating up 19 yr old girls and some guys she looks 17 yrs old and is naturally built with alot of muscle, she is mixed white/black and when i try to talk to her she tells me that she is like this cuz she is black.

Answer 1

I'm sorry i understand what you are going threw,,..what she needs is an old fashion spanking...shes not worried about you..remember when we was a kid if we did something wrong we knew that we would have to face the consequences..well these kids these days don't have to worry about that...if i did something wrong when i was a kid i knew my *** was busted when i got home and i would always keep that in mind when i was about to do something wrong..let her call the police on you..what are they going to do say did she deserve it and when you tell them what she did they are going to tell you not to let her get away with it...if she keeps this up she will be in prison..you need to get a hand on her and let her know who the boss is...


My son once threatened to call the police on me and my husbands spanked him and then i called the police on him..it scared him so bad that he never threatened me with the police again and the officer asked him what he did and he told him and the officer told him that if he had to come back to my house because my son threatened me with the police he was going to take him to jail.. he was only 7 then and the officer was just trying to scare him...believe it or not the police has our back when we need to spunish our children they would rather see a child get swats then be put in a casket...

Answer 2

She needs counseling. I know this might sound crazy, but her behavior is caused by an underlined issue. I have a little girl so I don't know how it is to raise boys, but I will say from all of my friends who have boys no matter if they are younger or older than the girls the moms seem to treat their boys differently. I will say border line better then their girls. I will not say that, that is what you are doing it just seems like her behavior is saying some attention is better then no attention. I have learned from my own experiences that being in the same room as your child or taking them to a function where they can interact with other kids is still not you (mommy) giving her"your" attention. You have to make some one on one dates just the two of you. For example if your boys played football and you tried to attend every game, and then when you daughter says mommy can you do something with me no matter what it is, and you just can't get out of work that day or something came up really important and you could not make it her immature 12-year-old mind is going to say you spent more time with the boys even if that is not the case that is how it is interpreted, and that interpretation might be where the behavior is coming from. The bottom line is their is an underline issue, and you are the enemy so you need to get her into counseling even if it is in her school so she can let some of what she is holding on to go. You guys are all ready at a point where she is not going to open up and talk to you which in return is going to cause you to feel the way you do now often.

So get some out side help (couseling), and good luck. One more thing if you do decide to do this don't let any one put her on any meds or have her tested for A.D.D. because that is not the problem. Good luck.

Answer 3

What about just letting her take her lumps. Perhaps a few days in juvenile detention would get her attention, If protecting her isn't working, then stop wearing yourself out trying.

It teaches a manipulative kid how to manipulate you. She's not evil, she's 12. Have you gotten her a medical workup, and pyschological evalutation?

If you can't handle her, it's okay to get some help--before she hurts herself or does something that will impact her for a long time.

She sounds like a natural for sports, too.

good luck--having a child you can't handle will empty you out--energy wise and emotionally. People who don't have to deal with a difficult child will never understand (or be compassionate). You will feel alone a great deal of the time.

look at www.loveandlogic.com, they have an approach I try with my three boys, that helps keep me calmer, and removes my emotions from the discussion about their behavior and consequences. Easier said than done, but some good food for thought.

Take care, and God Bless you.

Answer 4

This sounds like a tough situation to be in. But keeping her locked up in the house, isn't the right answer. I'm assuming you are white and her dad is black. Have him sit her down and explain that not all black people go around beating people up. Explain to her that she is a girl, she shouldn't be using so much violence and curse words. Get her involved in a church group. That might help her start hanging out with kids her own age. Good luck... And forget about all the stupid answers the people are putting. Everyone goes through rough parts of life, maybe your daughter is just trying to get through stress. Did you and her father get divorced recently? Did someone close to her die? All these are good explanations of why she might be acting like this. When my parents got divorced some ofmy younger siblings didn't know how to react, so they started acting out. They just wanted attention. Good or bad... they didn't care, they just needed someone to sto and notice them.

Answer 5

It sounds like she has alot of emotional problems and you are not getting through to her . She may need counseling . Or maybe even more . I have found that children who act out the most are screaming for discipline and they have no idea . My grandson was so bad that he pushed me once right after a surgery . Next he tried to challenge his Dad { who by the way is X Military and a X cop } not too bright huh ? Anyway she had to send him to a military school . He loves it and is doing very well there . No child is beyond help you just need to find what works for her . P. S. It is not your fault .

Answer 6

Time to find Daddy. She's acting out her anger and aggression for a reason. You can also take her to the doctor and make sure there is no biological reason that she is behaving that way (like bi-polar disorder.) At 12 yrs old, I have to warn you, if it's like this now, either she's going to control your entire household soon, or you will be visiting her in juvi. And hopefully you correct her when she says her bad behavior is a result of her being bi-racially black! LOL

Answer 7

There is alot of places that help children like that. Have u ever seen Nanny 911 she is alot of help. If u don't want her help u will have to send your daughter away to a boot camp for disrespectful children. When she comes back u should see a change in her. This girl sounds serious so you better act fast. Real fast. It is for the safety of u and others.and her.

Answer 8

well, thats the fact when you raise a girl ..like my moma once told me ..I feel for you and i dont have kids , not yet! Seriously, all childrens Services offer a service called "try again homes" we used it when my cousin ,was living with us and needed counseled.. If she refuses , I would look for a " Boot Camp " program through maury povich show ..Hey hun, just given advice..Good Luck ! And Seriously, don't feel bad if she goes to a "Boot Camp " program .. You are saving her from pregnancy.. Seriously!! Thanks , Good Luck!

Answer 9

12 year old? still time to help change her life around. seek help for both of you and maybe the rest of the family, maybe setting up a contract of behavior will help? there are some real nice youth group homes that can help straighten her out.. good luck.

Answer 10

She needs some psychiatric help. And some tough love. She is too old to be spanked.

She needs help, before her picture ends up in the post office.

Where is Dad, can he help?