dating advice from women please?

Question

There's this girl I've been chatting online for about 3 or 4 months. We met each other a week ago but she only agreed to meet me as a friend. I think she was/is cautious cause she broke up with her boy friend just before I met her online.

During the meeting we were walking and chatting for about 1 1/2 hours, she was laughing and smiling. Then I took her home because it was late. She also mentioned she was looking for an apartment so I helped her to find it next day. No hughs so far.

If I send her an e-mail or an sms and ask how is she then she replies and asks me the same. I've recently asked if she would like to go to a concert but she only appologised and said she will have other plans that day.

I think she needs time for another relationship but at the same time I think she might not be interested in me anymore.

The question is should I keep on waiting and give her more time or say that I can't go on like that and want to be together?

Many thanks

Answer 1

My opinion would be that if she said she only wants to be friends then you should take her at her word. It has been a few months since her and her boyfriend have been separated. If she were interested in you, I think you'd know by now. She may not be willing to get into a relationship just yet, but she should be open to idea of dating by now.

As a woman, I find it very frustrating when a man continues to pursue more than a friendship with me when I think that I have made it clear I'm not interested. I don't want to be forced to hurt his feelings by blantanly turning him down, so I prefer for a man to take me at my word.

If your feelings are terribly strong, and you decide that you'd rather be rejected and know for sure than to not take the chance then I recommend you send her a card or e-mail saying something along the lines of, "I'm very thankful that we've met one another, and I've enjoyed getting to know you over the last several monts. {insert qualities that you like about her, and maybe a couple fond memories} I know we agreed to meet as friends only, but I've developed feelings for you. I understand there is a good chance that you don't share these same feelings for me, but I couldn't take the chance of not telling you how I feel. If at any point you decide you may want to take small steps towards being more than friends, please let me know, otherwise I'll respect your feelings and be thankful for our friendship."

Answer 2

You know we have all been hurt at one time or another in a relationship. We can all say we are scared, we need time, I don't want to get hurt again and we hide behind all the old crap that has nothing to do with someone new. We lived through the 1st hurt we will live through many more. Each is a lesson and experience. Listen to your gut! If you have to "make" it work.....it is not worth it.....move on. Life is to short. If it was right, you would not have written this question. Actually, I think you know the answer and what you need to do. Good luck and you will know when it is right!

Answer 3

It's smart to give her space and not pressure her to jump into another relationship, especially when she could be on the rebound. She's probably loving the fact that she can spend time with you without having to deal with the relationship pressure. If you really like her, just keep waiting until she's ready to want to be with you. All relationships start out as getting to know the other person or as friends. I'm not telling you to spend $$$ on her. But give her time, she'll realized that you may be the one soon enough.

Answer 4

hmmm that's a tough one, you like her but you don't want to be the rebound guy right! Give her time to bounce back on her own. I'm sure the attention you have given her is greatly appreciated but don't rush things, she may still be in mourning from her recent breakup. Especially since it has been a few months and she's not questioning where this is going, try other options, but keep her near in case she has a chnage of heart. Hopefully if she does it won't be too late for you two...Good Luck

Answer 5

Just invite her once again to go to cinema, concert or pizza and let her pick the date that is best for her. You will see what she says. If her answer is the the same as the last time look for another girl. Good luck

Answer 6

the point is what's goin on inside her head???did she just want you to help her out findin some apartment i mean did she need some help from a guy or it was kindda pleasure for her to hang around with you....i think if you could hold yourself back and stop callin her or drop some massage would be helpful...i mean just stay shush and don't show your face for sometimes if she calls you it means you might get her later on but if she didn then that's a sign of NO...
just be patient
good luck

Answer 7

From the male perspective I would say dont say that 'you cant go on this way'.

I think you should maybe meet somewhere casual for coffee or whatever during the day and ask her if she fancies doing something later on.....

dont make yourself sound desperate though, play it cool

good luck :)

Answer 8

I think you should tell her you really like her, and ask her if she feels the same about you, or is using the "not gotten over the boyfriend" excuse to let you down gently.....unfortunately my friend, I'm afraid it's the latter......but you sound like a really cool guy, keep looking!

Answer 9

You should tell her what is in your heart and not your head.I am a woman and from my view it sounds like all she need is na person she can lean on but she might want more and she wants to see if your faithful if you are then she might want to date you.

Answer 10

i think you should forget her for a while if you can, either she is shy or she's not interested right now, send her a message asking her to call you some time if she feels like it