I just wanted to get some random opinions of this. Do you think a man that openly admitted to never being faithful before, could change, grow up, or just reform? Is there anyone out there who HAS? I just want to hear different experiences with this- would love to hear from people who have actually gone from cheater to devoted partner, if there are any out there.
2006-08-29 06:41:54 · 21 answers · asked by meow 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Don't let the holier than thou answers sway you. None of us were born in a manger.
Bottom line is we are all capable of cheating and all capable of remaining faithful.
Cheating is a good picture into a person's character but if cheating is involved it is obvious it is NOT True love nor is it the right person. A chronic cheater has deep issues concerning their own self esteem and may be very likely to do it again until those very personal issues are dealt with.
It is not the cheating but the reasons why someone feels the need to cheat.
If they are just a dirty horndog just dump them.
If they are wrapped up in issues dump them.
If they Truly Love you they will not cheat.
2006-08-29 06:51:50 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
A one-time cheater can be reformed, but a habitual cheater is a chronic cheater.
Whether or not people admit it, I believe that most people are tempted to cheat. It's just an issue of telling those voices/urges to shut up. Some people aren't always strong, and will make that mistake. These people can be reformed--because they know they made a mistake.
It's the people who constantly cheat that are the problem. They don't see anything wrong in what they do. Now--relationship maintenance aside, I have some issues with cheating because of the liability it introduces to a relationship. Disease is something that you don't need to worry about in a monogamous relationship, but once there is a breach of that, then unknowing people can be infected.
2006-08-29 13:52:45 · answer #2 · answered by sara_busa 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There ARE cheaters who are chronic cheaters, and there are those that have changed. I think it really depends on the person...if he admitted to never being able to be faithful before, thats like his disclaimer. When he cheats, he can say, "hey I told you already that I have never been faithful..."
Now if he said, "I have cheated in the past and I dont intend to do it again ever, because..." I would say give him a chance. I think it is POSSIBLE to change, but a lot of the people who are cheaters do it more than once because its a thrill that they get addicted to.
2006-08-29 13:49:46 · answer #3 · answered by kari 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is just like anything else, smoking, gambling, drugs, shopping, whatever, a person can change if THEY want to.
The problem is that cheaters like to cheat. It is fun. They should never get married in the first place, but society almost requires it as a condition of happiness. Then the cheated on spouse wants the cheater to change, and that never works.
Oh BTW, women cheat too.
2006-08-29 13:47:02 · answer #4 · answered by javelin 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I disagree with most people. I think that one can change. I think there comes a point or maybe a person in someones life who makes you realise that its not the answer, that there is something better, or maybe that your able to communicate with better, maybe you become religious, maybe its just part of growing up but people can change. I have cheated before in my past but never did so on my husband and really can't imagine doing so ever again. I have made the decision that if my life becomes such where I begin to seek the attention of another then the one I am with needs to know or has to go. Hopefully with the need to know will come communication and change of whatever circumstance has led me to that feeling. If that's not the case then I must first end my relationship with that person before begining another.
2006-08-29 13:50:02 · answer #5 · answered by Red 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
NO--- I am a FIRM believer that once a cheater ALWAYS a cheater. If this guy openly admits that he has NEVER been faithful... then he is lining you up so that when he DOES cheat (and he will) he can say, well I told you, I've never been faithful!
2006-08-29 13:45:45 · answer #6 · answered by Angel Eve 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I was a chronic cheater and then I found a guy that I really love!!
It still shocks the hell out of me that I'm not interested in anyone but him.
2006-08-29 13:49:17 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Once a cheater, ALWAYS a cheater.
Any one, male or female, who would cheat on a partner they promised fidelity to and claim to love is a despicable person. There's no "reforming" from that fatal character flaw.
2006-08-29 13:45:34 · answer #8 · answered by kja63 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Depends on the person and reason the person cheated. Some people can change. Others seem to stop developing mentally by the time they reach adolescence.
2006-08-29 13:46:00 · answer #9 · answered by wjays 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Cheaters stay cheaters, but faithful people can become them as well. I think if someone is drunk and kisses someone by accident and never does it again, they are faithful. If someone has sex with someone and knowlingly does it and keeps doing it, then you have a problem.
2006-08-29 13:46:42 · answer #10 · answered by hawksfan17 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋