How do you explain sex to a young child so that your not explicit and they can understand................?

Question

My daughter is 9 and has come home asking what a virgin is and some boys at school say that they had sex and wants to know what sex is. She is very smart but we are christians and I am a single mom .........and she has friends whom parents are not very intelligent i am afraid of what she has already been told.........

I am a medical professional but at home is definitely different...........

Answer 1

All the answers I read were somehow good.I read this question from a single father and there were lots of good answers to him ,too.(story of birds and bees)
I have an eight year old daughter that sometimes asks such questions but my case is different in my country most people do not have sex before marriage and if they do it is hidden so nobody talks about it and children will not have any information from others.
Now you look at your society,if your child will hear s.th at school tomorrow,tell her yourself today.Give her books to study then she will believe you not her friends.Children prefer to count on their friends talk so prove what you say.
For the word "virgin" : you can show her a picture of body( a drawing not real photo) and show her the location and say it is s.th to prevent microbes to enter the ladies womb till they are ready to be pregnant and will be disappear after marriage.tell her that if girls loose it under a certain age they will have lots of problems and diseases.
I think some girls in 9 are as mature as girls in 13.
Good luck .

Answer 2

My mom explained it to me when I was about 8 or 9. She sat down with me and explained the whole getting the monthly period thing and one topic lead into another. She even drew pictures for me so that I would understand the female reproductive system.

It was a very mature conversation and I don't ever regret knowing about the birds and the bees at that age. In all honesty, it enhanced my relationship with my mom. And just because I knew at a young age doesn't mean I went out and did it with every Tom, Fred, and Joe.

It's better to hear the facts from a parent and not a friend who has no clue. She's asking...so be honest and tell.

Answer 3

I disagree totally with the person who said it is a beautiful thing, etc. etc. Sex is just that...........sex. It is an act between a man and a woman. It is something that grown ups do. Tell her what the bible says, what your beliefs are and that is it. Later on explain that making love and sex are two totally different things. Sex is just a release. Making love is a commitment of mind and body..showing love to the person that you are married to.
Ask her what questions she has and answer them with short specific answers.
What is a virgin? A lady who has not had sex with a man.
What is sex? It is sometihing private that a man and woman do together. some people think that it is okay to do at ayoung age but it isn't because they can get pregnant and are not ready to be a parent and are not yet married.

Answer 4

I'm beginning to think this isn't a one-time deal. At different ages, you can present age-appropriate facts. My son is 6, and I don't believe in lying or sugar-coating, but he's too young to get into depth, obviously. The "average" age of experiementation is going on 11 or 12 now, so this is a good time to explain more. But parents also need to explain that it's not just a physical act, but an emotional one, no matter what MTV tells you, and that sometimes it's more loving to not engage in the act than to do it. Our culture ignores this.

Answer 5

A lot of times a simple no frills answer is enough to satisfy the child. But be honest because hopefully you can build on the answers as the child ages and the questions become more sophisticated. IE. don't tell a 3 year old the stork brings babies because when the child is 12 you will need to tell them that was a lie and reexplain the baby thing and the child may not believe you because you lied before.

Answer 6

It all depends on their age and the exact question they've asked.

If there really young and ask where a baby comes from, you don't need to go into detail. You can just say something like: "when a mommy and daddy really love each other, they make a baby in mommy's tummy." That could be enough to satisfy their curiosity for a while. Just give correct, age appropriate answers.

Answer 7

Everything I have ever read says that you should only answer the questions that your child asks...don't go into too much detail unless they press for more info. Tell her what a virgin is and what it means to have sex with someone - she is definitely old enough to know the basics. Don't scare her with details and statistics of STDs and teenage pregnancy. Tell her what sex is and what it means to be a virgin. Tell her that sex is a very special thing and that God meant for it to be shared between a married man and woman for enjoyment and for reproduction. Keep it very cut & dried and don't use any cutesy terms. I hope that helps! Good luck!

Answer 8

1.God made man and woman to fit together in a very special way.

2. A husband and wife lay very close together.

Or at 9 maybe gently just tell her it all. It depends on her maturity level.

I went to a Bible Book store and got the book "Where do babies come from" and it has sex talk based on the childs age. 6-8 9-11 and 12 and up. Each gets more detailed. Although it is about baby's, sex is how ya get them, so it tells about sex.

Answer 9

how old the child is pretty important. If your not sure how to put it very simply I would suggest discussing it with the childs teacher, they always know how to phrase it and better understand the childs ability to process the information. Parents notoriously give way too much information. All you literally have to do is answer the question they ask....ie, where do babies come from? A mommy carries it inside her until its born........Hows it get there? When a mommy and daddy love each other and want children God gives them a baby.......get the idea? We want to explain everything to them and its usually too much. There is a lot of info online and books at any bookstore!

Answer 10

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How do you explain sex to a young child so that your not explicit and they can understand................?