Help my dtr is driving me insane with this boyfriend issue?

Question

She is 15 (16 in Nov) All A's (honors). She does not go out. She is now crazy about a new boy and does not know how to break up with the other. I wouldnt be so bothered but we talked and she said that she was crying in school, ect. I want her to continue talking to me but i M loosing patience with the issue not to mention that she is so ugly to her little sister ( 5yrs old) and blames it on stress. She was home 10 minutes yesterday and was so bitchy that a screaming match (which I won) took place and she was made to go to bed. After everything calmed down , 5yr old asleep we went on the swing on the porch and talked. I can't make her see that maybe she doesn't need a "boyfriend". She didn't agree w/me. I am trying to be a good mother (single) but feel here lately that i do nothing right for her or so it seems

Answer 1

shes a teen nothing u say is right i have a 17 and 19 this moring my 17 daughters bf (18) got his phone ect taking away when she started to talk to me about it she started to cry when i asked her why she was crying she says i hate not being able to talk to him before school (cells) she had talk to him the night before. all we can do as parents is give them advice and storys from when we were that age we cant force them to take it. she does not need to take it out on the sister. keep doing what your doing shell learn and than thank u for being there good luck

Answer 2

I did not get along with my mom (single mother) in my high school years. Looking back, here is how some things could have been different.
My mom tired to control me too much. I was trying and learning to become more independent because that's what kids do at this age. Confusing time. It's a push and pull effect. The controlling nature made me want to rebel.

I had all A's until a boy slipped into the picture (my first boyfriend). I kept wanting to break up with him, but he wouldn't let me. He's stalked me, and made my life miserable at school. School is just as important to a kid as work is to an adult, When the *** hits the fan at work, other things suffer. Same as school.

Have more patience with her. Stick up for her, not demand how she should do things. Teach her about boys and men and be thankful she still talks to you about it. She's only 15. She's not emotionally as strong as you nor has she had as much expeience as you. She's a baby in this area. Take baby steps with her. Don't get mad it's not going the way you told her. She has her own way. Help her get stong in that. I was lucky and had someone (another adult) to stick up for me with this boyfriend and confront him and the torment ended. Be her savior, not her ruler.

As for the terrible behavior with you and her sister. Have a family bonding talk about how it's the 3 of you and to succeed, you all gotta stick together. And maybe take into account she really is stressed out. She has multiple bosses (you and teachers) and at this confusing time of life (childhood vs. adulthood) take into account she also may be pre-menstrual. She may not understand her symptoms and how they affect her. I sure didn't understand them like I do now at age 33.
Be so careful of this time with her. It could make or break her bond with you as an adult. It nearly shattered mine with my mom. I hope I helped give you an insight on her perspective from personal experience. I may not know her like you do, but the story is a familiar one. God Bless.

Answer 3

I used to be this way with my mom. Understand that when you have a teenager you aren't "hip" or "with it" at all. You never understand ANY of their problems completely because you were a teenager like SO a million years ago! :) You've just got to learn when to pick and choose your battles with them. "Raising children is like being pecked to death by birds!" lol Good luck. Try to find some time for yourself to recover after the stress of arguments. And reassure to the 5 year old that what your 15 year old is going through is normal and that she doesn't hate her, etc. Also, try not to argue too much in front of the younger one. Again, good luck! Hope this helped! :)

Answer 4

Calm down, Mom.

FIRST, you must both get to see a family counselor. You are both too emotionally involved in this issue to see clearly and actually help one another. You could ask the school to recommend someone since this is also affecting her school work --after all, if she's crying in school, she probably isn't paying attention and her "all A's" will soon suffer.

Shouting matches won't help and you won't "WIN" them, either, even though it may seem so at the time.
And it might start to affect the 5-year old, which you don't want.

Get some help, please!

Promise?

Okay, please keep us posted.

All will be well.

Answer 5

properly, you stated your self that he's a sex addict. So obviously he feels the favor to get off plenty, obviously it really is why he masturbated. If he would not get it from you, he will flow do it himself. If that extremely bothers you certainly i'd split with him. A "generic" guy that wasn't addicted to sex would purely wait till you at the on the spot are not there to masturbate. obviously if he is going into the lavatory when you rejected him, he obviously can not help himself/ would not care what you imagine. Now you realize his actual personality, so choose no matter if you need to be with him.

Answer 6

Her decision to make BUT in the meantime she still has to treat everyone with respect and civility. If she don't ground her.