I love my sister. Really love her. She's one of the most important women in my life besides my girlfriend. We just live together in the same apartment and have no parent, they've passed away.
We're used to killing time together, but then she mentions about more quality time together for just two of us... what is she talking about actually?
Oh, yeah, I'm currently 21 and she's 20.
2006-08-29 03:47:51 · 58 answers · asked by Professor Franklin 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Hunny life is to short, enjoy every moment with your sister and family. Give flowers now that are alive, they can smell them, but not when they are dead. Pick one day a week just for you and her and ask her what she like to do and make it happen. When she ask you this question is because she knows that you two are getting far from each other. When you are with your friends and she is around, pay attention to her and make her feel important in front of your friends, some brothers, don't like to hand out with the sister when are around friends. but you must make her feel loved and that you care for her. Make her feel fitting in. you will see a big smile in her face and she will tell you how you make her feel. You two will become closer than ever.
Best
2006-09-05 02:47:44 · answer #1 · answered by TRANSLOPEDIA 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
The phrase you use "killing time together" might be the clue...if you hang around the apartment aimlessly, it might seem to your sister that she is part of the furniture, not an important part of your life. You both are on the cusp of adulthood, and soon will find others that fill a special place, so it might be a bit scary to her that your girlfriend takes a lot of your time, and she is put to the side. If you take the time to choose activities with your sister, go out together for things that you once did as a special treat, an old family tradition, or create a new one, she will not feel as if you are moving beyond her. Maybe a night at home making s'mores and playing scrabble by family rules? Taking her on a picnic to her favorite beach? Putting together a scrapbook of family photos and mementos? As her brother you probably know more about her than anyone else, so use that knowledge to share some fun and meaningful times. This will deepen your bond so that you will always be close, even after jobs, marriages, children intervene.
2006-09-05 18:23:05 · answer #2 · answered by herewittykitty 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stand by your sister young man BUT live your own life as well,Try to include her in a few things with your girlfriend, Your sister is lost in this point in time be patient with her I think you will find she is just lonely and maybe resents your girlfriend a little seeing as there is only the 2 of you, you are doing a wonderful job, but do not make your sister too reliant upon you I know you probably did the big brotherly thing to look after your little sister but she has to learn that you both have different lives to live,Its a hard question you have put and I really feel for you, Do you have any mates that may like to take your sister out on a date, I think that once she starts seriously dating she will be not quite so clingy as she is at the moment. Good Luck I hope this will help you a little in your dilemma
2006-09-05 19:48:40 · answer #3 · answered by brotherjohnsfo 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How long has it been only the 2 of you. She is probably going through a hard time with the loss of your parents and is concerned over loosing you. Maybe you could make an effort to devote an afternoon to just the 2 of you. I am sure soon she will get a boyfriend and that should help her desire to have quality time with YOU. Remember, each of us deal with the loss of family different and I am sure loosing your parents at this young age has been very difficult. Sounds as if your sister needs to feel your committed to your relationship with her and are willing to make sacrifices to prove it. You are both young and I am sure guys are in the picture. You'll never get another sister, try and help her through this tough time, she'll love you for it and you'll be a better person for it to! God bless you both.
2006-09-05 18:54:48 · answer #4 · answered by LAUSDDISTRICT8MOMOFTHREE 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Quality time means one on one - just the two of you. Some ideas might be hobbies together, watching movies at home together, but the best idea is playing board games - all types. She wants to do things to "bond more closely with you". Go out to eat together or take turns cooking for each other. She just wants you to be a close part of her life and it takes effort on both of your parts. Walk or run together each day and "just talk". She wants to know you and know about your life and she wants you to be interested in her life. LISTEN & ASK QUESTIONS. Women love to talk to each other (bond) and they like hugs from their family members. Hug each other regularly since you only have each other and no parents.
2006-08-29 03:57:49 · answer #5 · answered by debbiedo 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
maybe she sees you as a stable part of her life and is trying to be sure the bond you have wont come to an end,,you have a girlfriend and obviously want to spend time with her also but if your sis has not many others out there she may just be wondering where your relationship will go if she doesnt make an extra effort to keep you around,,losing parents at your age is tough and this may have a huge bearing on her wishes.
2006-09-06 00:39:07 · answer #6 · answered by lex 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you are reading into this more then it should be read. You are her older brother and as far as shes concerned, your whats left of her family. Your older brother role also has another assignment. You are now the father figure in her life. You both suffered a loss together and she doesn't want to loose you as well. Be greatful and happy that you both are close. I have a tight relationship with my siblings and I love spending time with them. Sometimes I don't think I spend enough time with them. Don't take her for granted because you wouldn't want to loose her either.
2006-08-29 04:32:40 · answer #7 · answered by Ro Ro 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe she feels you are spending to much time with your friends and she feels left out.. take a night out of the week and just have that day to do something with you.. she may need someone to talk about important stuff since your parents have passed away..Does she have a group of friends of her own? When both parents have passed she may just want the family feeling. and you are what she has.
She may be jealous of your girl friend taking up your time.
you guys are really young to be on your own.. and it is great that you are together.
2006-08-29 04:09:17 · answer #8 · answered by Sandy F 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Awww--- shes trying to cling to u--- the fact both ur parents are gone-- makes u the parent figure--she knows ur all she has left-- so now she wants u to be closer than ever-- since u have a gf ur sis feels shes not the only chick in ur life-- so its might feel like ur pushing he aside an shes hurting--- one night when u take out ur gf--- u should make it something ur sis can tag along on-- go bowling-- fishing-- something u all 3 can sit an do-- maybe go to a movie---or is she has a bf-- double date-- just make her feel like shes apart of ur life! Now this is what my sis an bro in law do-- our parents are gone an my sis is all i have left-- so im telling u-- thats what shes doing--- trust me-- also--- plan one day where its just u n her-- go to the mall-- or get some lunch-- an u pay-- be like aw its on bro-- an give her a big hug-- just make her feel wanted-- nothing hurts more than knowing ur own bro doesnt think ur important-- well let me know the outcome-- byes!
2006-08-29 03:55:02 · answer #9 · answered by sourkandi2486 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
your is just a bit insecured i think. as you said you two are very close (especialy so coz your parents are no more) she is probable scared that you wil not care for her so much now that you have a girlfriend.
her reactin is very normal n i think you shoul help her get ovwer her fear. discuss this with your girlfriend also. ask her to help you out by reaching out to your sis and explaining her that as your girl she just wants to be apart of your family and has no intentions of taking you away from your sis. your girl has to make an extra effort to make friends with your sis, to win her confidence.
you too should help your sis by ensuring her that your family isn't breaking up it's expanding. why not make your sis join you and all three spend time toghter like families do? not going out only but also having meal together at home when ever possible.
i am sure it will help. also encourage your sis to have her own life, go out with friends, date guys etc
she will then accept the idea of your life not just as her bro but also as an individual.
all the best.
2006-08-29 04:04:40 · answer #10 · answered by urfriendfrlife 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋