Help Me!!!!!!!!!!?

Question

We just got engaged 1 month ago and we are having an engagment party this saturday and last sunday we got in this really big fight and he moved out but we worked things out last night is it still right to have this party now that we have had this fight it just doesn't seem right to have this party like i still want to get married to him and everything but its just we are not the same as we where before, should we cancell the party and have it another weekend or should we go along with it?????????

Answer 1

Hard question.

How much is involved in the party? If family is coming from all over and there has been a ton of work put into the party then I would say go through with it, for everyone else's sake.

If you believe you can get out of it without too much damage (hurt feelings etc.) then one of you should get "sick" really quick and start calling things off for the party. (I say sick because it's no one's business what is going on in your relationship)

Answer 2

first of all...breathe...and add punctuation marks in your question :) ...second, every couple has fights. I'm getting married in two months and you wouldn't believe how many fights I've had with my boy where we almost called the whole thing off.

If you and your man have worked things out, you should ask him if he still wants to have the party, if you two still want to be engaged. It's a decision for the two of you. If all is well, there shouldn't be a reason why you two can't have your engagement party even though you had a huge fight.

If however, you two are thinking about calling things off (since you mention that you two are not the same as before) and you don't feel right having your party, then go with your gut and don't have it. Postpone it. It would be better than pretending to be happy when you're not.

Answer 3

Fighting and quarrelling (or at least disagreeing!) are normal -- for the most part. The moving out part is a little extreme, however, so I would take some time to talk with your fiance about what happened and why...especially if you feel things aren't the same as before. (It's important to deal with it now! Open up discussion, and let him know that you still want to be married to him and that you still love him...)
On another note ... with a wedding (and marriage!) in the near future, many people just get nervous and distracted, making it easier to flip out over even the little things. So if you've put a lot of time and energy into this party, I say go through with it. Perhaps some time with friends and family who are excited about this step you're taking together will be helpful to you both! A little celebration could heal some of the wounds and put you guys back on the right track.

Answer 4

Go ahead and have the party. The guests have already bought gifts and spent the money for travel (if applicable). They are looking forward to it, so you shouldn't let a disagreement get in the way since you are still planning on getting married.

A fight can change things, but sometimes it's for the better. Getting as much out into the open before the wedding can save the heartache later. You won't be the same from one day to the next, your relationship grows and changes with time and knowledge. It's usually for the good too.

Have fun this weekend, and enjoy your love. It won't always be a bed of flowers, but that's what makes a marriage strong. The ability to endure and adapt to each other is something that is a crucial part of successful marriages. Compromises have to be made, and sometimes problems put aside.

Answer 5

Depends on what was the fight over?
Things aren't usually the same after a fight. You're suppose to learn & grow from them.
It's no one else's business about this fight. That is something personal between the two of you. If the two of you worked the issue out & still willing to get married, then I say go ahead with the plans.

Answer 6

Cancel the party and get some couples' therapy.

If you go ahead with an engagement party and then break up after it, it is going to be a major embarassment for you, AND you will have to return any engagement gifts you received.

I have been in that position, and trust me, it's nothing you want to experience.

Answer 7

As long as you worked things out and you did not break the engagement it is still alright to have the party... as long as there is no tension between you two and everything is truly worked out. People bicker and fight and have to cool off. It's normal in every relationship and marriage. Don't worry about it. As long as you two are still planning a wedding then nothing is wrong.

Answer 8

Hard to say, but if you cancel the party, the speculation and gossip will begin!
I'd really recommend some pre-marriage counselling, if you're willing to split up over a fight. Marriage does not work that way. Remember, that most relationships are not always forward moving; sometimes, it's one step forward, two steps back, one step sideways, then 3 steps forward again. It's willingness to keep with it that matters. Good luck.

Answer 9

Sounds like this may have been your first big fight? Its OK! Couples fight. My husband and I almost broke off our engagement because we fought about what religion our kids should be baptized in. We worked it out. Trust me, you will fight, its inevitable. Don't let that stop you from celebrating! If your happy with him and love each other...show it, and share it with your family and friends! Have the party, you'll be happy you did. Congrats!!! and good luck!

Answer 10

Do you think this will be the only fight you'll ever have? Have the party, enjoy yourself and just know that more couples fight while planning weddings, why do you think they have a show called "Bridezilla? lol Emotions fly high but once the wedding is done, things will settle down.