I'm 33 married woman. I have a question about complex situation of my younger brother (27). He was a nice, jolly, handsome sportsman and very caring and loving too all. I had always great understanding with him and on my husband's request he lives with us as he himself has to be on buisness tours frequently. I was not much worried finding out my brother was into flirtious acts with number of gals but considered it a normal thing for guys. I start worrying when he start getting isolated and spending most of time in his room. Too boot, he suddenly announced he wont marry his fiance without giving any reason. finally I decided to talk to him and after a lot of hesitation he scummbed to pressure and admitted that he got addicted of self-pleasure while having immoral sexual thoughts in mind. He also confessed that he started it with suggession of a doctor and get addicted and now do it 3 or four time daily. Hes afraid he has nothing left in him to be married now. Please help me..
2006-08-29 01:59:35 · 6 answers · asked by samera 1 in Health ➔ Diseases & Conditions ➔ Other - Diseases
for freinds how are helping me, he did not tell me whats his immoral thoughts but i found incest movies from his drawers..and brother-sister stories
2006-08-29 02:21:46 · update #1
Encourage him to seek professional help. This may be very hard as the situation is embarrassing for some. As with any addiction, the person needs to want to stop. Talk to him about how it is affecting his life and that there is a way out. Get him to talk to his fiance, she needs to know that he's going through some psychological issues. She doesn't need to know the details, but if she realises he needs time and understanding, her love for him will help pull him through this. Is he taking any drugs or medication that may be complicating his situation? Make sure he knows that you are there for him, and that you love him unconditionally despite his problems. Please don't allow yourself to feel responsible or get too stressed out. He needs professional help but must be willing to help himself. If he's not ready to, don't pressure him. My little brother is going through a tough time presently. I'm not sure if it is severe depression or schizophrenia but he refuses to see a doctor. I ended up sending him to live with my mum as the stress was too much for me for to deal with. He is slowly getting better, but I struggled with the feeling that I should be able to do more for him. Don't put too much pressure on yourself. If you fear he might hurt himself or someone else, speak to a doctor yourself, or if there is immediate danger, phone emergency.
2006-08-29 02:23:45 · answer #1 · answered by sali_starr 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is a mental issue...not a physical one. What your brother was doing (masterbating) is normal and most men thrive on it at some point in their lives. A lot of women too...
He needs to be told by a professional that he is not immoral or bad and that he can still be married.
He may need counseling to recover from this false sense of guilt that he's feeling.
He needs his family to tell him that he's normal and he doesn't need to stop his life because he thinks about sex with the woman he was going to marry. Frankly, I'd be more worried if he didn't think about it...and like it.
2006-08-29 02:06:36 · answer #2 · answered by lilly 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He has a lot off emotional issues that need to be dealt with. The masturbation is just a symptom of the problem, not the cause. Help him find a counselor and get himself straightened out.
2006-08-29 02:13:07 · answer #3 · answered by kathy_is_a_nurse 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it would be interesting to know what these immoral thoughts are. whatever they are, if they are concerned only with himself or other consenting adults, they are not immoral, and that is the thing he needs to learn. masturbation, btw, is actually a natural process that actually helps with procreation because it means there will always be a supply of fresh sperm there when sxual intercourse actually occurs. it wouldn't be a bad idea for him to see a counsellor. the counselling results in him getting back with his fiance, good, if it doesn't but he'll learn to feel with himself whatever the result is, good too. of course, if his thoughts do not concern consenting adults, but children, animals etc. he needs medical help fast, in that case please try to convince him to see a doctor. good luck!
2006-08-29 02:11:48 · answer #4 · answered by nerdyhermione 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
jus let him know its normal and its ok!!!
Tell him if he likes masturbating he will like sex with his wife even more and it def does not mean there is less in him!!
Tell him what its like to be married!
To be honest i find it a little surprising that at his age he doesnt know all this...
Just talk to him and make him see he is ok and/or get him to talk to his fiance!!
2006-08-29 02:11:26 · answer #5 · answered by lazydazy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
please tell your brother to get some counseling & a
new Dr. let him know that this can be helped &
changed if he's willing to do so
2006-08-29 02:11:53 · answer #6 · answered by start 6-22-06 summer time Mom 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋