I consider Wal-Mart to be God's gift to shoppers. Literally, here are the similitudes I have noticed between the kingdom of Heaven and the Kingdom of Everyday Low Prices.
Heaven: St. Peter greets you at the gates
Wal-Mart: Some old geezer named Peter greets you at the automatic doors
Heaven: Eternal
Wal-Mart: Open 24 hours
Heaven: Where old people go when they expire
Wal-Mart: Where old people go when the retire
Heaven: Plenty of Room for everyone who loves God
Wal-Mart: Plenty of Parking for Everyone
Heaven: Golden-haired angels shouting the glory of God
Wal Mart: Purple-haired obese women shouting for a price check on diapers
Heaven: Salvation and redemption no matter what your sin
Wal-Mart: Full money refund on no matter what your complaint
Heaven: EDLP = Every Do-gooder lives peacefully
Wal-Mart: EDLP = Every day low prices
Heaven: Sam Walton -- now a resident!
Wal-Mart: Sam's choice cola -- now on sale!
2006-08-29 01:11:52 · 18 answers · asked by EL Big Ed 6 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
i just have to say LOL. i needed that this morning. nice analogy. thank you
2006-08-29 01:16:00 · answer #1 · answered by blondie 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
you really must be bored stiff w-m can go to hell and most of them old geezers were once small mom &pop stores down the street that you used to go in infancy and buy a bubble gum for a penny
2006-08-29 01:17:55 · answer #2 · answered by aldo 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wal-mart contributes heavily to the Republican party. I love to shop there.
2006-08-29 02:25:00 · answer #3 · answered by Jayna 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Walmart gets in products from countries with child slave labor that's why the prices are so low.
2006-08-29 01:38:25 · answer #4 · answered by hh 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Woo Hoo...Amen for Wal-Mart!
2006-08-29 01:16:30 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Wal-Mart is ruining america, I hope they all go to hell
2006-08-29 02:49:13 · answer #6 · answered by dicka512001 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yeah as the other guy said AMEN
2006-08-29 01:54:11 · answer #7 · answered by Pd 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Walmart contributes heavily to the Republican party. I refuse to shop there.
2006-08-29 01:16:03 · answer #8 · answered by Hillaryforpresident 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
That's kinda frightening
2006-08-29 01:17:15 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
LMAO! Throughly enjoyed reading this!
2006-08-29 01:15:22 · answer #10 · answered by X's Mommy 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That's great,, kinda scary though,, hmmm beware of false prophets.
2006-08-29 01:15:15 · answer #11 · answered by B V 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋