I made some terrible mistakes when she was growing up. I have paid for them & so has she and her siblings. I am not the same person anymore. I have changed in so many ways. All I want is a chance to show her that I will never hurt her again. I can be trusted not to go away again unless God takes me home. We all deserve a chance to be a family. Why won't she just try to let that wall down just a little bit?
2006-08-28 14:59:45 · 14 answers · asked by Jazzylikethat 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Time has a way of healing all wounds. You probaly didnt get in this mess overnight so it wont fix itself overnight either. Just take your time and dont expect to much at once. If you do that I will bet a year from now things will look alot better for you.
2006-08-28 15:14:51 · answer #1 · answered by noname 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry to say that you just have to let her make the first move. You just keep on doing what your doing as I believe by what you write that you have changed. You feel that you have paid the price and now you feel that she should just forget whatever it was that you did wrong. For some people it is harder but in time, God's time she will come around. I also did my daughter wrong and that was 14 years ago. I have been praying for her all the time and for God to bring her back into my life. Well just two years ago I recieved a fathers day card and it really surprised me. I wrote her back but never heard back from her so now I'm waiting again. But I just have to leave it in God's hands and know in His time I will see her again. This is very hard to do but you also need to just leave it in God's hands and when He see's that you are just leaving it in His hands then she will come home to her mother because I don't know of any child that doesn't need their mother. I just hope it is the same for the dad, just don't give up hope, don't give up your faith. Have a Blessed Day, Matt.
2006-08-28 15:10:21 · answer #2 · answered by Matt T 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Its hard to let people back into your life when you have been hurt. It takes time to learn to forgive and also trust again. The best thing to do is ask for forgiveness, and give the situation time. Not everyone is ready when you are- she may have issues to sort through, especially if she is still young. Time helps, and letting her know you love her will help too. Maybe it would be good to seek counseling for yourself, if you havent already, to help you step in the right direction towards reconsiling with her, and then after some time, invite her to maye attend. Family counseling can sometimes work wonders. Just my thoughts- good luck.
2006-08-28 15:07:47 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Saying you're sorry is a small portion the equation. Change your actions. You can't be her mother anymore, but you can be a friend. Acknowledge that you caused her pain and treat her the way you should have treated her. Call her often. Don't be shy or expect immediate results. Don't be pushy either. Just let her know that you care about her and eventually the wall would be broken!
2006-08-28 15:17:06 · answer #4 · answered by martha 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
those days are gone.
it will take age and maturity before maybe she'll let go of some of those things and try to reaquaint herself to you.
don't give up but it's going to be a real long road with many bumps, potholes and a steep incline too.. stay on the road be patient.
that wall will be there a long time, maybe forever but you can break out some of the wall and put a door or a gate there.... that's step one.
remember.. be prepared for a life long journey doing this.
good luck.
2006-08-28 15:06:34 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
They never forget, but they can forgive. It takes time--once they see with their own eyes that you've changed, then they can start to rebuild trust in you--but only they know how much time they need to get to that place. Don't give up, just keep doing the right things and making the right choices in life, and it will all fall into place when it's supposed to,
2006-08-28 15:21:07 · answer #6 · answered by Maybalee 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Growing up my mother wasnt there for me and my 2 brothers. I still to this day blame her for alot of bad things that have happened in our lives. When i turned 18 me and my mom formed an actual relationship. You just need to let your daughter come to you. She'll realize that she only has one mom and that life is too short to hate somebody forever. People make mistakes and the good thing is that your aware of your mistakes and you want to make it right. Just give her time. SHe'll come around. I hope everything works out for you.
2006-08-28 15:21:24 · answer #7 · answered by andrea lynn 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What ever the case may be, she needs time and space to come to reality. Mother or Father, she has lost something that was once the most important thing in the her world. She may have you back but she has no trust. It is like a parent who loses trust in there child, the child has to earn trust that back. Same goes for a parent. It is different for children, and I think, we as parents sometimes forget that. We brought them into this world, they have no choice but to trust us. It is our job to protect them, be there for them, love them, nurture them. Then, at times we mess up and have to work harder for them to trust us again. Talk to her and give her the time to gain that trust back.
2006-08-28 15:13:50 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The only thing you can do is set the good example now.You cannot change the past. Either she will see that you have changed or she wont.You can't push her into letting you back into her life.She may never relent, but you will always be her mother and nothing she says or does will ever change that.
2006-08-28 15:10:59 · answer #9 · answered by S.A.M. Gunner 7212 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You all need to be in family counseling, as this is a matter that requires a bit more than just a single answer.
2006-08-28 15:04:52 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋