At what age (if any) does it become a negative to be a virgin?

Question

I am a female virgin pushing thirty. I was just wondering if there was a limit to the age limit where being a virgin becomes a negative in the eyes of the opposite sex. It seems that in the U.S., it is seen as a good thing for teenage girls to still possess their virginity. I would simply like to know starting at what age bracket is virginity seen as an "odd" trait instead of as a "good" mark of character.

Answer 1

No such thing as an age limit, it is amazing how many virgins I know, all of whom seem to be under the impression that being a virgin is somehow a good thing – I say if they are still virgins they obviously don't believe their own ideas on the negativity of being a virgin, if they honestly believed being a virgin was a bad thing they could have easily lost their virginity by now.

I do however understand the stigma, when that film '40 year old virgin' came out I cringed, so too did I cringe with something as little as the 'wax virgin' adverts from Veet wax strips, both implying there was something wrong with virginity, never mind virginity for those over the age of 16 – that would be the minimum age of sex, not the maximum as some seem to believe.

For a woman I do think it is easier to be a virgin because we still very much have these old fashioned ideas that a woman should be feminine, and to be feminine you cannot like sex, you must be virginal and good, for teens it is a matter of controlling teenage pregnancy by reverting girls back to the stone age. Tosh of course, however you then do also have more of a message sneaking in that to be a woman of today you need to be liberal about your sexuality, not a slut or a whore per say (not that there is anything wrong with either) but I suspect more of a stigma to the opposite effect is now creeping in. We ladies have to be the perfect balance of everything publicly, privately it is different, if your partner (assuming you have, will have or want one) is ok with this and you are ok with this then that is all that matters.

I think it all depends on how 'simple' the person is you are talking to, my own boyfriend was a virgin before meeting me at the age of 22, I have known virgin women over thirty, people seem to think this is shocking – what is shocking is that I don't bat an eyelash when people tell me they are virgins any more – there are more of you than we think!

As far as I am concerned only an idiot would determine your being a virgin as a negative, whether you are a virgin for religious reasons, you're ugly, homosexual, picky, spinster, looser, or very simply you are a woman pushing thirty who happens to also be a virgin…it makes no difference, and it says nothing for who you are.

Answer 2

I would say 40. But don't let the pressure hit you to do just for sake of it. I think it admirable that your saving yourself for that special someone.
It is true to see teens keep there virginity especially the way things are going with teens.
I would say do not fold to the wrong guy because I could see that you cherish your body and you not will to give it freely.
Take care and I hope you find the right guy.
I have actually saw a documentary on virginity and I think the oldest virgin was 60 years old. So your still good.

Answer 3

Ah Jeez, I don't usually answer these sorts of questions, but the way you've asked seems like your sensible so what the heck. So then, my second wife was around thirty when we started dating. She was, well; like you. That wasn't what I was used to, so to speak; my first wife most definitely was not. I found it sort of, well hard to understand. I was stunned really. I didn't look at it as good or bad, just very surprising. I personally don't think of it as a mark of character so much as a choice. In these days of ours it does seem a little restrained, but if you've not meet someone that made you feel , well special that way; then that's all there is to it. Certainly not odd in the sense of there's something wrong with you. I hope you find that someone special, thirty is a wonderful age to fall in love! With all that entails as well, LOL! Good luck, youngster!

Answer 4

I am a 26 year old female, who is still a virgin. Although I understand the "pressure" in which there may be to have sex (especially given my age), I really do not care. I trust that such a decision is a good mark of character, and that is what most matters to me.

Answer 5

Virginity never really becomes a negative to men. However, in response to some of the other answers, there is nothing immoral in finding a person with whom you have a great enough connection and having intercourse with them. Sex has been proven to relieve stress, increase endorphin flow, and even prevent or neutralize migraine headaches. Having sex should only be viewed as negative when someone is sleeping around promiscuously and is no longer using any semblance of protection. Sex is a gift, as is orgasm, that should be enjoyed, if you have that mindset. However, we should all remember that a little protection goes a long way and, as far as STD's go, we all need to do our part in staying clean and preventing the spread of diseases.

Answer 6

there's never an age where virginity becomes negative. it's good that you're keeping your virginity till you find the right person. right on! virginity represents your morals, values, and beliefs. it's ok to be thirty and still a virgin. i don't think it's a problem. whoever that lucky guy will be will appreciate what you will give him and it's only for him.

Answer 7

I agree with Johnny Bravo.Your virginity does not become a negative ever.
I personally think that your decision is smart and admirable.One would think that in these days and times, a lot more people would be virgins or practice abstinence.
I bet if you talked to a number of woman,they would tell you that they wished they'd lost their virginity in a different way.

Answer 8

I don´t think being a virgin would ever become negative. It is something that should always be valued, no matter what the age. I think you should wait until you´re married. I am 19 and I´m saving myself for marriage, and I´m proud of it.

Answer 9

It is beyond amicable that you have been able to maintain your chastity in this day and age. It's beautiful, magnificent, perhaps even awe-inspiring. You should definitely stand up right now and take a bow!!! I, for one find the fact that you're a virgin extremely compelling, and I'm sure that the person that you decide deserves to be with you will feel the same.

Answer 10

I do understand what you mean. There is a point that you become very self-conscious telling people that you are still a virgin. But if you've made a decision to wait for marriage, or to wait for a relationship to reach a particular point, that's your business--and the type of guy that you're waiting for won't find it negative. If it's because of religious belief, a man who shares that belief will find it very positive.