My brother and I went out one night drinking. Well he had too much to drink and started calling me all sorts of bad names, for no reason, to the point where he even hit me...It totally sucked. We had a very good relationship, I just don't understand what happened... After all that drama, I never called him back, but he did try to call to apologize... It has been a month now.. I was really bothered by it. I didn't tell anyone in my family, but he did, and it sort of feels like they all feel bad for him....He seems to blame the alcohole, what do you think it could have been? What should I do? Some advise...
2006-08-28 13:19:31 · 14 answers · asked by losing my way 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
OK.... well no one can blame alcohol for hitting, or abusing someone even if it is a close relative, i say everyone deserves a second chance, but it is up to the person who has been hurt to make that decision. your family needs to hear your side of the story before they can start feeling sorry for anyone, after all u were the victim. i don't think anybody has the right to hit someone at all even if they were asking for it, u need to tell your brother your feelings and how much he upset, hurt and made you angry that night, otherwise it just might happen again.
i hope i helped in some way.....
2006-08-28 13:29:30 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well it's easy to understand why you'd be upset. Just because he's your brother, it doesn't mean he gets a free pass, but it does mean...he's your brother and he should get another chance.
Schedule some time with him and talk to him. Tell him what your concerns are, i.e.: You don't want to get hit again, you feel you can't trust him, etc. And then inquire about what's going on in his life that would make him have such an outburst. For all you know he could have a really serious alcohol problem and need help. It's understandable if you don't want to be "best friends" right away, give it some time. He could also have some psychological issue, but most likely it was the alcohol. Remember, it's cool to give your brother another chance, but don't let him hit you again!
2006-08-28 13:36:57 · answer #2 · answered by Christina K. 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
One more chance? A brother deserves way more than one more chance. Granted, what he did was pretty bad, but he tried to apologize. Maybe he had some other stress in his life and he took it out on you. It's not right, but people make stupid mistakes - especially around their families because that's where they feel the most comfortable.
Talk to him and let him explain what happened. If he blames it on the alcohol alone, then tell him that you never want to see him that drunk again. If you ever do, insist that he get professional help to stop drinking.
2006-08-28 13:22:24 · answer #3 · answered by FozzieBear 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have no idea; it could've been a onetime thing, or he could have a budding drinking problem, but I am encouraged by the fact that he called you in an attempt to apologize. The fact is, you're going to be brothers for the rest of your lives, and it is important to keep that relationship in tact as much as possible. Brothers are resilient ( as you'll soon discover), but life is short. Time you spend feuding is time you don't get back.
2006-08-28 13:26:20 · answer #4 · answered by Captain S 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you have always been close and he let alcohol get the better of him ONCE and he realizes and is genuinely sorry then i would say definitely give him another chance - only just don't go drinking with him again because of what happened
is there any point in throwing your brother away completely because of one evening?
alcohol rarely brings out the best in a person - just something for future reference.
2006-08-28 13:31:13 · answer #5 · answered by Aslan 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Okay, first, this is not the alcohol's fault, he's the one who decided to drink it, the alcohol didn't just jump into his mouth. Tell him that if he's going to go out drinking like that, he's gonna have to learn to control himself, because you're responsible for your life, alcohol doesn't control you. Be willing to listen to him, and if you think it's the right thing to do, forgive him, but know that it's completely understandable as to why you feel this way.
2006-08-28 13:26:51 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he made a move to apologize, even though you were hurt by his behavior, I would accept. He is your brother, and we all make mistakes from time to time, which doesn't make it any more right, but give him another chance, and tell him he should not drink that way if he is going to embarrass you or hurt your feelings. All families have problems from time to time, but I think since he knows he is wrong, you should forgive him....this time!
2006-08-28 13:42:10 · answer #7 · answered by autumn wolf 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well it is a fact that some people do have problem's with a additive in alcohol... i think it would have been the alcohol.... the best thing to do at this point is to actually talk to him about it and tell him your feelings on the situation..
2006-08-28 13:25:09 · answer #8 · answered by krazy guy 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Alcohol does do really weird things to people. Forgive your brother but try to encourage him to get help. If he was that out of control with you no telling what's going to happen next time he gets drunk. He shouldn't be drinking if he has such extreme reactions.
2006-08-28 13:29:07 · answer #9 · answered by DeeDee 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My guess is that he's not happy with his life right now. Thats why he's taking it out on you. Do you feel you're better off than him? if you say yes. Then he's probably stressed out about something. My advice to you is to sit down with him and ask him if he's having any problems. If he says he's ok then he's denying it. But you should give your brother one more chance, also make sure that if you approch him, you approach him with open arms. Don't hold any grudges.
Hope that helps you out.
2006-08-28 13:49:22 · answer #10 · answered by deais74 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋